Alfred’s defensive stance faded, and he smiled.
“Oh, yes, well, one does seem to follow naturally from the other. Speaking of which, it was quite a spectacle at the auction. I wish I could have been there to see it. What were you thinking, making such an ostentatious bid?”
“Well, I grew tired of losing out on everything else. I thought I should make an offer that nobody could match,” Edmund said, keeping his true intentions hidden from Alfred. He preferred everyone to see him as a reckless rake. It was a reputation he had cultivated for many years, and it had worked well for him. People expected little from him, which allowed him to live a somewhat private life.
Of course, he had revealed the truth to Rose, but only because she deserved to know how close she had come to falling into the clutches of that dreadful Lord Whitcombe. Edmund shuddered as he thought about what might have happened to her. So many poor women had been cast out of that man’s estate. Ladies had been stripped of their dignity, and when Edmund saw the chance to interfere, he could not stop himself.
But if people started to believe that he was capable of nobleness, then they might start thinking of him as a gentleman, and that would not do at all.
“And now you are going to escort Lady Rose Bolton five times. That is rather a lot for you, isn’t it?” Alfred continued his teasing. Edmund didn’t mind because it was all in good fun.
“Indeed, it is, but I am sure we will not run out of conversation. I just hope the young lady can keep up with me.”
“I must say that I don’t know much about her. Charlotte told me she’s Lydia’s friend, but beyond that…”
“She is not shy of speaking her own mind, and she does seem somewhat pampered. Frankly, it doesn’t surprise me that she does not have a husband yet, because she seems demanding. I am not allowed to call for her too early, and if I take her to a public park, we must use the smoother paths because she doesn’t want her shoes to get muddy. And you should have seen her when I looked through her book. My goodness, you would have thought I was strangling her cat!”
“Well, it seems as though you have your work cut out for you there. It wouldn’t be the first bad investment you’ve ever made, though,” Alfred said, slapping Edmund on the back.
“No, and at least I shall only have to pay the price for a short while. Besides, it was all for a good cause.”
“So there are no intentions for you to seek her hand then?”
Edmund furrowed his brow and looked at Alfred as though he had suddenly started speaking in a foreign tongue.
“Her hand? And why would I ever want to do a thing like that?”
“Because it’s about time you settled down, my friend. Time waits for no man. You are thirty now, and you must think about your future. Stonewood needs a strong heir, or would you rather it be passed to some distant cousin who knows nothing about the ways of business?”
Edmund turned away in an effort to hide the grimace on his face. He thought about his parents and how their marriage ended in sorrow. So far, things seemed to be working out well for Alfred, Mary, Charlotte, and Nathaniel, but it would have only taken one tragedy for them to be thrust into sorrow.
“The place will be in fine hands, I am sure. If I can manage it, then anyone can.”
“I will never understand how you can be so cavalier about marriage. Don’t you ever think about getting old? Wouldn’t you want someone to sit beside you and offer you companionship? The winters are only going to get longer the older we get, and to face them alone… I could not bear it.”
“And I could not bear having to see the same face every day. Variety, my friend, that is why I can be cavalier about it. I am sure you are quite happy to have the same meal every day, but for me? No, I must sample everything the world has to offer. I would only grow bored with the routine, and I am sure that any woman who spent more than a few months with me would find the prospect intolerable.”
“That is a good point,” Alfred said.
“So, all in all, it’s much better for me to remain alone. Besides, it is hard enough for me to focus on one thing at a time anyway. How could I pay attention to our business ventures if I got married?”
“As you wish,” Alfred sighed. “I should have known better than to talk some sense into you. It is just that Mary worries about you. She thinks you would make a fine husband. Even young Clara has started asking questions about why you do not have a wife, and I can only avoid the subject for so long. And she is only nine!”
“Why would you wish to avoid the subject?”
“She is hardly old enough to speak about such things. I only indulge her because, well, it is hard to refuse,” Alfred scratched the back of his head.
“You are too soft, my friend. But Clara has been a precocious child since the day you and Mary met, and I am sure she can handle the truth, especially when it is stated by her father.”
Alfred’s face fell. “I am not her true father, only her stepfather.”
Edmund placed a hand on his shoulder. “You are her father in every way that matters, and I am sure if I asked her, she would say the same thing,” he said, then chuckled. “Tell them to have no fear. I am quite happy. I have the luxury to live life as I see fit, and there is no greater freedom than that,” he said, masking his true emotions with a grin.
Because he thought about his parents, and how much they had loved each other, and how that love had been doomed. Every time he considered how he would feel if he lost someone he cared for, his heart was torn in two. The pain he imagined was so intense that he had no desire to experience it himself.
Love was the realm of brave fools.
He was neither.
