As I rounded the corner of the barn, Caleb walked out and we collided. I stumbled due to the big boots and he caught me, pressed a warm hand against the small of my back and pulled me close so I didn’t fall. I placed a hand on his chest as I steadied myself and immediately noticed he’d taken his shirt off. Feeling flustered, I pulled back and tried to hide my cheeks that I knew were bright red now.
“I’m sorry! I didn’t hear you coming,” he said as he glanced down at the boots and smiled.
“No worries, I, um... I brought you a water bottle since it’s hot out here.”
He gave me an appreciative grin and took a long drink of water. He motioned for me to follow him into the barn and offered me a stool at the workbench. Duke lay just inside the barn so he could lie in the sun but not get too hot.
I sat there watching Caleb for a moment before either of us spoke. He had pulled up a stool and positioned it closer to me than where he found it but still left me some space. He took a small towel from the workbench and wiped the sweat from his head and face, his muscles flexing with every movement. Suddenly, I realized I had been so focused on him, I didn’t notice he was now watching me. I was so embarrassed but chanced looking at him anyway.
I figured he would make fun of me immediately. However, he smiled at me with that sweet smile that always met his kind blue eyes. Then he winked at me, which caused me to blush again.
I didn’t know how to act. Ethan always humiliated me. At first, it had been him teasing me, which was fine cause it was just for fun. I can joke and have fun, but after he changed, he did anything and everything to humiliate me, sometimes publicly.
Caleb must have noticed I had been staring at him and hadn’t said a word, so he broke the silence first. His voice was low and warm. “Enjoy the view, Sunshine?”
I realized that even though I had been lost in thought, I hadn’t stopped staring at Caleb. Without a chance to recover from blushing after he’d winked at me, I knew I had to be a brighter shade of red now. A nervous laugh escaped my lips, and it caused his smile to grow even bigger.
“Sorry, I—” I couldn’t make the words come out.
“Don’t apologize, Sunshine,” he said as he flashed another genuine smile. The warmth in his voice made my heart feel a bit lighter, like I had been weighed down by bricks for years and they were now slowly being chipped away.
“Caleb, I want to apologize for this morning when I kissed you.” I blurted the words out, almost too fast. Caleb’s face twisted into a look I couldn’t read. Confusion? Hurt? Disappointment?
“I... I’m sorry. I hope I didn’t upset you.” Again, I spoke too fast, hoping I hadn’t upset him.
Caleb looked at me with a look I’ll never forget—all warmth and quiet understanding, like he could see straight through the walls I’d built. “Rae, the only reason I’d be upset is because you think you can’t be yourself around me. Because I want you to be comfortable around me and I don’t want you to feel like you need to apologize for anything. What he did to you, I would never do. You have nothing to apologize for. That kiss...”
I stood up from the stool and walked toward the barn door but didn’t leave. His kindness was almost too much, and I didn’t know how to process it.
The warm breeze felt nice in the shade of the barn. The only noises were the rustling leaves in the trees and the chickens. I tried to focus on those quiet sounds instead of the storm brewing in my mind.
I hadn’t heard him move but I could tell he was behind me. Even though he didn’t touch me or say anything, the heat of his body radiated near mine.
“Sorry, I just needed air,” I murmured, unsure if he would’ve heard me since I said it so low.
“Sunshine, that kiss showed me that you feel safe enough with me to let your guard down a bit. I hope...I can continue to show you just how special you are.” He walked in front of me, cupped my chin, and looked into my eyes. “So...incredibly...special,” he said slowly, as if each word were its own sentence.
He pressed a small kiss just next to my lips, and I knew it was so I could pull away if I wanted to and not feel forced into it. The fact that he thought about that meant the world to me. Before he had time to pull away, I turned my lips to his. As soon as our lips met, he pulled me gently to his chest. Everything went silent. All the chaos in my mind vanished the second our lips met and I was in his arms.
I leaned into him, one hand on his arm and one around the back of his neck. My heart was racing. Nothing about our movements was rushed. He was letting me lead, letting me set the pace. I had never felt so safe in my entire life.
Slowly, he moved one hand to the back of my neck, and with the back of his other hand gently rubbed my arm. My body somehow felt numb and every nerve felt alive at the same time. I started to smile while kissing him and he pulled back slightly to look at me. His blue eyes almost had a glow to them.
“That was...” I didn’t even know how to describe that kiss.
“I feel like any word would be an understatement.” He chuckled. The sound of his laugh was music to my ears.
“Ye— mhm.” I tried to form a word, but he gently touched my cheek with the back of his fingers, and I lost my train of thought. He leaned in, kissing my forehead, and I closed my eyes, hoping this moment would never end.
