“I’ve already decided. I’m keeping the baby.” When exactly I’d made that decision, I wasn’t sure. But there was no question. It was what I wanted.
“That’s great. Doesn’t mean you have to go through it alone.” She wrapped an arm around my shoulders, pulling me into a tight side-hug. “You might be a bit of a mess right now, but you like Caleb. He likes you too. Don’t shut that down.”
“You know I already did. He asked me out, and I said no. Remember?”
“Then change your mind.” She squeezed me tighter. “I’ll talk to him if you want. He’ll understand.”
“What? Don’t you dare.” I tried to pull away but she had me locked in.
“Why not?”
I gave in, sagging into her grip. “Because a relationship right now would be a mistake. A big one.”
“Who says it has to be anything right now? Just let him in, Zadie. Stop slamming the door every time he knocks.” She released me from her stranglehold but pinned me with a glare. “You won’t do it on your own, and I don’t want to hear you crying when you realize I’m right.”
Why did I ever bother arguing with her? The more I disputed it, the more convinced she became.
“Fine, Chantel.” I shook my head. “Do whatever you want. My life’s already a disaster. Might as well bring Caleb into it. I’m sure he won’t mind having his cousin set him up with a pre-made family. What young guy doesn’t dream of taking on eighteen years of someone else’s responsibility?”
“There’s a lot about him you don’t know.” She straightened, arms folding tight across her chest. “If you knew, you’d realize how wrong you are. But you are right about one thing. I don’t think I should fix any more of your problems. I love you, Zadie, but you need to pull your head out of your ass.”
My jaw dropped, but she wasn’t done.
“You’re not the first woman in the world to have an unplanned pregnancy. Not everyone would consider it a disaster.” Her voice cracked on the last word. “Some might even think of it as a blessing.”
The wind caught her hair as she turned, but not before I caught the glint of a tear on her cheek and the wobble of her chin. She walked away, leaving me standing on the sidewalk with a lump in my throat.
Either I really was a horrible, raging bitch, or I didn’t know my best friend the way I thought I did. But she sure had a handle on me.
The selfishness. The self-pity. The constant spiral. All of it needed to stop.
Right now.
Those reckless feelings weren’t solving anything.
And apparently, neither was anyone else.
Week 9
Chapter Twelve
Caleb
Being friends sucked.
Not the concept. I could handle friendship. What I couldn’t handle was the way Zadie shut down every time we were alone together, like being in the same room without a buffer was a trap she needed to escape.
It was getting old. And I was done tiptoeing around a woman who slept across the hall.
The smell of buttered popcorn drifted through my open door. Chantel had declared it movie night, and from the sounds coming out of the kitchen, the two of them were either bonding or committing murder.
Something was going on between them. I’d been too far away to hear their argument at the park, but I’d watched the whole thing. Zadie’s body language had been tight, defensive. Chantel’s had been explosive. Whatever they’d fought about, it was big. And I couldn’t shake the feeling it had something to do with me.
“Caleb!” Chantel’s voice tore through the house like a fire alarm.
I was down the hall before the echo died. But there was no fire. Just the two of them in the kitchen, throwing popcorn at each other.
“Zadie’s trying to make me watch Sinister.” She pointed an accusing finger. “She says it’s a must-watch. I don’t believe her.”
