‘I can’t believe you gave me a key and trust me to let myself in,’ she beams. ‘To us?’
I watch her eyes light up as she holds a drink out for me. It’s not what I thought we’d be toasting to but I find myself raising my glass anyway.
‘To us,’ I agree.
Yoga
Alice
I went for tie-dye harem pants and a maroon T-shirt with the words ‘You Had Me At Namaste’ written on it for today’s date. Not my usual choice, I’ll admit, but I thought it would be fun to try some actual yoga and not just the sit at home, eating cake on my yoga mat with Natalie type. Besides, Zach loves exercising and he’s seemed a bit distracted all week so I thought this would help him de-stress.
He’s standing outside the studio when I arrive and I can see him do a double take of my ensemble.
‘Hey,’ I beam, reaching up to kiss him.
He smiles down at me but there’s something missing. His usual spark. I was utterly touched by the treasure hunt he’d set up for our last date but he’s seemed a little bit lacklustre ever since and I can’t for the life of my figure out why.
‘I’m guessing we’re doing yoga?’
‘Ten points! Was it the invitation to join me at a yoga studio that gave you your first clue? Maybe I should do a scavenger hunt for you next time.’
‘Always teasing,’ he says with a smile.
‘Come on, let’s go and stretch it out. I know you’ve been stressed with all the house renovations you’re doing on top of everything else, so I thought yoga could be a great way to unwind.’
Our instructor is called Ocean, a wiry, red-haired man with a South Yorkshire accent which leads me to the conclusion that Ocean may not be his actual name. He’s definitely big into water, though. The sound of crashing waves floats from the studio’s sound system and Ocean is wearing a pair of cropped but baggy blue shorts with a nautical print on them. And nothing else. Once the room has filled, he rolls out his mat at the front and switches off the sounds of the sea.
‘Heyyyyyyyyy,’ he says in a soft, lilting voice, motioning for us all to sit down. ‘Welcome. Today we’ll be practising with no music so that we can completely tune into our own bodies.’
Oh no. Please don’t let me fart. I’ve only done two classes at this studio before and let’s just say that I learned an important lesson about why you should never do group yoga after a cannellini bean wrap for lunch. At least that time there’d been background noise so I could look around accusingly, hoping no one could pinpoint me as the source.
‘During today’s flow we’ll focus on our upper bodies. Easing from one movement to the next. No jamming or forcing, just letting ourselves flowwwwww.’
Zach shoots me a look.
I bite my lip.
We start with our legs crossed and our palms at our hearts and I try very hard to listen to Ocean as he talks about clearing our minds. Mine is totally clear, I think. Absolutely empty. Did I use the last of the milk this morning? I should get some on the way home. No, focus on the flow. Did I lock up the flower shop last night?
‘Anyone find their minds wandering?’ Ocean asks and I realise he’s now standing right next to my mat.
I shake my head serenely.
‘Now to breathing,’ he says, taking a deep breath in through his nose and exhaling with an extremely loud AHHHHH sound through his mouth.
‘Inhale,’ he instructs and the sound of about fifteen people breathing in fills the room.
‘Exhale AHHH.’
We all attempt a tiny ahh.
‘Louder,’ instructs Ocean.
‘AHHH.’
‘LOUDER.’ Ocean practically barks this, losing his seascape voice for a second, and I jolt one eye open. After breathing in, I see Zach opening his mouth wide and I follow suit, trying not to giggle.
‘ARRRRRRGGGHHHHHHHH.’ We all but shout as we breathe out, tittering to ourselves.
