When I finally made it to the fields, Dovelyn was already waiting. “Alright. I’m here. What do you want?” I asked.
“I want to talk to you about your father—”
Oh hell no. I started walking away. There was no way I was about to talk to her about that, even if I owed her my brother’s life. I’d been actively avoiding thinking about everyone I lost. Itried to block out my mother and Moli. They didn’t deserve to die. The feeling of guilt and sadness and grief washed into me whenever I did and it was all too much.
And my father was even worse. The emotions I had about losing him were confusing as hell, and I didn’t feel like figuring them out. The only time I’d willingly open those doors was if Greyland wanted to. He was the only person I would uncover that grave for.The only person.And he was just as stubborn as I was.
“I knew him…” she said, her voice was soft, but I heard every word perfectly. I stopped walking. “Before you were even alive. I met him over a century ago.”
I slowly turned to face her, forcing myself to keep my expression blank, forcing all my emotions down. “So what?”
“So I wanted to tell you about him.”
I scoffed. “No, thanks. I know who my father was.”
“No, you didn’t, Sie. My father and Athler, they… they…” she let out a breath. “They changed him. The person you knew and grew up with wasn’t your father.”
“I don’t care,” I started. I didn’t want to hear this. I didn’t want to know…
“Well you’re going to listen to me whether you want to or not.”
“Why?” I snapped.
“Because I can tell it’s eating away at you. I can tell his death bothers you. You feel guilty about missing him. I can see what you’re doing. You’re spiraling, and as much as I don’t particularly like you, we need you in this war, and we need you to be mentally sane.”
“I’m fine,” I snapped, and I realized I wasn’t coming off remotely close to fine. My fists were clenched at my side, and I hadn’t realized I’d taken a step toward her. I was leaning down, practically spitting the words in her face.
She didn’t move. She just tilted her head up and met my gaze with her own piercing look of defiance. “Just hear me out once. Only once and then I’ll leave you alone.”
“I don’t need to hear you out at all. I’m leaving.”
I started to walk away when she said, “I’m either going to tell you in private now where you don’t need to worry about anyone else overhearing, or I’ll tell everyone at the next meeting, and you’ll be forced to mask your emotions while everyone stares at you. Your brother will most likely be there too. I’m sure you don’t want him hearing this in front of an audience. If you do this now, you can decide if you want him to know.”
“Fine,” I seethed. If she wasn’t a fucking air ability user who possessed shields, I’d compel her to never speak of it. But of course she was one of the few people who I couldn’t naturally compel—assuming she had a shield over her now, which coming into this conversation with me there was no way she didn’t. “You have three minutes of my time and know that I’ll kill you if you tell Greyland anything.”
“Five minutes.”
I ran my fingers through my long locks, then turned to face her, waiting for her to start, trying to put up my walls high enough so I could stomach to hear this.
“He used to visit a lot, making up excuses to get a work visa in Lux, and then he would spend every single free second he had with my mother. We had our own quarters away from the King, so no one ever noticed. It was just Arcane and I at the time. Tezya wasn’t born for another twenty years…”
I let out a breath, trying not to think about the fact that he also fathered the Fire Prince.
“I knew him from the time I was born. He was kind. He looked after Ar and I. He even brought us gifts every time he visited. I watched them together a lot—my mom and him.” She swallowed. “My father was never kind to her, and as all rank fivemarriages in Lux are arranged, I’d never seen it before. I never saw what it looked like for two people to be in love. It was intoxicating. I always spied on them under my invisibility, imagining if I’d ever find what they had someday. I saw them holding each other well into the night. I saw the tears shed every time he was forced to go. I saw his rage when my father called on my mother in public, and he was forced to sit back and do nothing. But as I got older, I also heard them talking. It was rushed whispers when they thought they were alone. Your father… he… he didn’t agree with the way things were. He wanted to get rid of the ranks altogether. He wanted a world where both Tennebrisians and Luxians could live together, and he could love my mother freely. Whatever the King said about him during the broadcast was a lie—”
“Dovelyn, I grew up with him. I know what he was like. He hated rank zeroes…”
“Let me finish, Sie. My mother didn’t die until Tezya was thirty-one. I was fifty. That means I’ve known your father personally for fifty years. I knew him. Therealhim, and he was more of a father to me than mine ever was.” She closed her eyes for a second before looking back up.
“I think you have the wrong person…”
“I watched him die during that broadcast, Sie. I don’t have the wrong person.” She blew out a breath before continuing. “When Tezya was born, they were more careful. My mother was terrified of what would happen if Tezya was ever discovered. When my brother turned four and the King’s punishments started, she wouldn’t let your father see us anymore. Ar and I were hurt, but Tezya was too young. He doesn’t remember him. They still saw each other, but it was stolen moments. He only came to my mother when we were asleep. They tried to hide it from us, from Tezya.”
Her breath hitched. “When my mother died, your father was distraught. He came to Lux without a work visa. My father andAthler found him before he even made it to our quarters. They thought he was there to overthrow them. Your father’s views were the start of the rebellion, Sie. He and my mother—they started it all back then. People were only just starting to act upon their anger for how our society was being governed and how our citizens were being treated.
“I saw them drag your dad down to the dungeons. I was under my invisibility and too much of a coward back then to come out of it and do something.” Her voice choked. “I didn’t see him for an entire decade after that. I thought… I thought they killed him. But when I saw him again, he changed. He was a different person. I think Athler used his abilities to change his way of thinking while torturing him. I think the effects of it over a decade were starting to seep into his being. I think he was brainwashed so thoroughly until there was nothing left of the person I used to know. When he finally returned to Tennebris, he hated rank zeroes. He got servants for the first time in his life. He worked his way up the Dark Council. I stopped following his life after that. It hurt too much. I had no idea he went on to start a family until I saw the‘N’on my mother’s grave. I didn’t realize the connection. The person you grew up with was a remnant of my own father, Sie. Anything you suffered was because of what the King and Athler did to him.”
There was a long moment of silence.
