I turned to look at him but his gaze was toward the horizon again. “I hate Dahes,” I admitted.
He turned to look at me then, his gaze solely focused on my face, searching my eyes, and not once drifting down my bare body. “Did you know him?”
“I don’t think anyone in Moriann truly knows him,” I settled on, not sure how to answer. “But I think he and Elion are similar. The only difference is Elion hides his cruelty behind rules and luxury. I used to dream about escaping here, always imagining Viven as the better kingdom, but now I’m not so sure.”
“There is no better kingdom,” he said. “Not anymore.” He was silent for a moment. “I’ve flown over the entire ocean.” His gaze shifted back to the horizon. “Aura and I, we flew over every inch of water hoping to find more land.”
“Did you?” I asked, barely able to breathe. I was getting used to Aura—his dragon. She flew him in every night. Most times she’d lay out in the sand for a couple of hours, basking in the last remaining dregs of warmth, but she never stayed. She always flew off.
He shook his head. “Nothing. We saw the sinking islands south of Ryaranthia, but I was hoping the stories from theWar of Two Kingswere a myth. That they’d still be afloat and Hilithia wasn’t the last remaining hope for civilization because Viven and Moriann are both fucked.”
I looked back out toward the horizon. It was what we’d always been told. That there used to be two continents with three kingdoms. The Islands of Perinth made up the third, apparently rising and falling during the war between Dahes and Elion.
The islands were known for peace. They weren’t involved in the conflict, but somehow they were the ones who suffered the most.Everything was destroyed, and there wasn’t a Perinthian left in existence.
It still felt that way now, that we were all forced to suffer from the two kings’ brutality, and it didn’t matter the cost.
“You were right about the mead,”I said, passing the bottle back to Hael, making sure I kept it above the water. I had no idea how long we stayed in the ocean, talking about everything as the gentle swells of water pushed and pulled around us. I was glad we were far out, glad most of the water was covering me, even though Hael made it a point to only look at my face.
“It does taste good.” Either that or my body was just getting used to the bitter burn of it as it ignited a warmth down my throat.
He took a sip, grinning into the bottle, before passing it back to me.
The mead warmed my belly, and I felt myself relaxing further with each sip. I was letting my guard down, my vision slightly blurring enough to let me know the alcohol was affecting me.
I shouldn’t be getting drunk, but fuck it. Honestly, fuck everything. Talking to Hael all night just made me more pissed off. With Dahes. With this whole Suns-damned situation. With myself.
I didn’t want to betray him.
I wouldn’t.
You have to, Magnolia. You don’t have a choice. If you don’t, Masinwill suffer.
I took another sip. Then another.
“Whoa, slow down,” Hael smiled, and Suns, why did it affect me so much? Why did my stomach flutter every time I saw his dimple?
I contemplated my next words for all of two seconds before I blurted them out. “I don’t want to take it slow.”
His smile faded. I wasn’t talking about the mead. Maybe he knew it. His eyes flicked over me, ignoring my breasts, even though I didn’tcover myself. I had my hair pushed over my shoulders. It was still wet from an outlier wave that crashed over us—well, over me. It had only reached Hael’s chin and he laughed when I frowned at him.
The water was mostly calm, but Hael told me that sometimes Caerulus dragons affected the tides as they soared over the coast.
“You’re shivering,” he said. “We should go in.”
I took a step toward him, the alcohol warm in my belly, giving me courage, because honestly, I wasn’t thinking straight. All I knew was one of these nights was going to be my last, and I wouldn’t realize it until it was too late.
I didn’t want to waste it anymore.
I had an eternity of wasting my life, and I might only have a single night to truly live it.
And I wanted to. I wanted to feel, wanted to live, wanted to give into this before Hael would hate me so fully.
“I don’t want to go inside.” I swallowed, then took another hesitant step toward him. “I want… I want you,” I breathed. I knew he wasn’t going to make the first move. I’d waited all week for something, anything to happen, but besides talking, Hael didn’t push anything. It was infuriating.
His eyebrows pinched, somewhere bordering pained and unwanted restraint. “Nollie, we don’t have to rush anything.”
Yes, we do.
