I twisted the knob, trying over and over again to open it. I had no idea the doors could even lock from the outside.
A thump followed labored breathing, and I knew he was leaning against the other side.
“Hael,” I shouted, my fists pounding against the wood. “Open the door.”
I had no idea how long we stayed like that—me desperately trying to get his attention, screaming every curse at him to open the door while simultaneously listening to his breathing get more and more labored until eventually another voice sounded.
My fist was mid-air about to pound into the wood again when I heard it.
“I’m here. Now what was so damned urgent that I had to—” the voice paused. “Shit. Hael. What the hell happened?”
“Ahthimil,” he breathed.
I heard shuffling. Then, “Fuck.”
“What do you need me to do?” the new person asked.
“Watch the door.” His voice was tight. “Make sure she doesn’t leave or,” he paused, “no one goes in.”
“Is she?—”
“No. I took care of it last night.”
I bristled.Took care of it.I wasn’t sure if I should pound on the door again, but at this point, I didn’t think they were going to let me out, and the second I revealed I was listening, I knew they’d stop talking, and I wanted to know what was happening to him…
“You need to go find?—”
“No,” Hael’s voice cracked. “Just. Watch. The. Door.”
Hael wasn’t at breakfast,and whoever he asked to watch over my door was gone as soon as Bran showed up hours later. I looked. I even ran up and down the hallway twice, ignoring Bran’s nagging, asking me what the hell I was doing. But no one was there.
I had asked him what drinks he sent me during the ball, but he had no idea what I was talking about, which meant it was a setup. He didn’t give me any drinks.
“But you said you were in the kitchen,” I protested.
“Yeah, that doesn’t mean I know how to make a Suns-damn drink,” he spat back. “I am a designer. I garnish the plates to make them pretty. Not even a prisoner starved in Dahes’ Hell would trust me to make a drink for them.”
I was a mess. I couldn’t sit still. My fingers kept fidgeting, and at one point I realized I was peeling the skin around my nail beds and nearly every single finger was bleeding.
The only time I could pay attention to what was going on around me was when Hael’s name was brought up.
Elion was furious he wasn’t at breakfast.
Then dinner came, and he still wasn’t there. My brain kept going through every possible scenario in my head.
He hated me. He resented me. He was disgusted by me.
Maybe he was still in pain. Maybe he wasn’t doing well.
Maybe he went to someone else forhelp…
Then I kept torturing myself by replaying everything I did last night. All the times I begged him to touch me cycled on a constant loop inside my head.
I wanted to die.
Mercifully, Cash didn’t come to my room for training. Although I was on edge waiting for it all night.
I couldn’t sleep—between replaying what happened, wondering if Cash would show up, and trying to figure out where Hael went—Istayed awake the entire night watching the moons replace the suns as they shifted across the horizon.
