CHAPTER ELEVEN
Pirates were gross, Sidney decided. Gross, and smelly, and weird. Especially up close and in person. The Lost Boys didn’t exactly smell great either, but the pirates werewayworse.
And the ship was—were thoseskulls?
Oh god, she was going to be sick.
Thosewereskulls on the front of the ship. Stacked up on metal skewers like elephant tusks. Some had flesh still, with seagulls cawing and diving at them, trying to rip chunks off as she watched.
The sun was just coming up as they were all loaded aboard dinghies and rowed back to a ship that Sasha said was called The Jolly Roger. Like Sidney cared. She just wanted to go home.
She just wanted Hook to die and get fed to that horrible crocodilethingso they could go back and try another book. Maybe she could talk them into a nice, charming, peaceful, Regency romance. Something with tea and scones. Where the only drama was if a duke had danced with a lady out of turn.
Notkiller mermaidsandskull skewersandelectro-dileandpiratesand she wanted to be sick and above all, she just. Wanted. To go. Home.
Sasha was just holding her, letting her cry into her shoulder, andshe didn’t bother to offer any fake words of comfort or any other nonsense like that.
Because no matter how badly they both wanted to go home, it wasn’t happening. Not anytime soon, it seemed. They climbed aboard the ship up a rickety ladder—with her going second to last and Sasha going last because she was absolutely notletting a pirate look up her dress, thank-you-very-much.
Sidney could only watch as the Lost Boys were lashed to the masts or to barrels or whatever was tied down to the deck. She was left standing next to Sasha, as “Mr. Smee” was guarding the special prisoner.
One of the gross men standing next to her leered at her.
She decided she was never going to like anything with pirates in it ever again. “Can I pick the next book?”
“I don’t know if that’s how this works, but, sure, if they let us pick.” Sasha reached out and took Sidney’s hand and squeezed it gently. Nobody seemed to want to say anything about Mr. Smee and Wendy getting a little cuddly. In fact, nobody seemed to notice.
It was like if they did anything extremely out of character, it just didn’t exist to them. Just skipped off the surface.
“But if you recommend some sappy romance novel, I’m going to bet money Vile refuses,” Sasha continued.
“That—but—” Sidney lifted her head. She wiped her eyes with her sleeve. Her tears were finally starting to dry up. “But that’s not fair. It’s a perfectly valid genre.”
“I’m not saying it isn’t, trust me. I’m just saying I think he’d rather gouge out his eyes.”
“Are we putting words in my mouth?” A heavy metal hook rested on Sidney’s shoulder. It was Captain Hook. He’d come up right behind them. “I love it when people put words in my mouth.”
Sidney went rigid in terror.
“Technically,” Sasha glanced over her shoulder at him, much less tense than Sidney was. His flesh-and-blood hand was resting on Sasha’s shoulder. She seemed far less unnerved by the murderouspirate’s presence than Sidney was. But, to be fair, Sidney wasn’t the one stuck with the guy. “Isn’t everyone always putting words in your mouth?”
Hook paused, looked as if he wanted to argue, then let out a hum. “Touché, my dear.” He smiled down at them. “Regardless. What were we saying about me?”
“Sidney wanted to know if she could pick the next book. I said I wasn’t sure if that’s how it worked.” Sasha brushed off Hook’s hand before reaching over and pushing the hook of Sidney’s shoulder. “And I was warning her you probablydon’twant to get put through a romance novel.”
“Well, I wouldn’t jump to conclusions.” The insidious smile that bloomed across Hook’s face sent a wave of revulsion crawling up through Sidney, threatening to make her want to yack. “But only if I get to pick thekindof romance novel. There are some wonderfully entertaining sub-genres these days.”
When Hook lifted his fingers and wiggled them at Sasha, a sick grin still plastered on his face, it took even Sidney—who’d be the first to admit that her mind was usually lodged firmly in the dumpster—a hot second to realize what he was insinuating.
“Oh mygod,gross!” She grabbed Sasha and pulled her a step farther away from the villain. “No, absolutely not. I change my mind.”
“Bah. And here I thought you were the fun one.” Hook began to stroll away across the deck, folding his hand at his back.
Sidney glanced at Sasha. There was a weird look on her sister’s face. It wasn’t disgust, whatever it was. Lowering her voice, she elbowed her twin. “Sash?”
“What?”
“You’re kidding me.”
