Crying didn’t cure me, yelling didn’t cure me, and tequila didn’t cure me.
Maybe this is something that just can’t be fixed.
CHAPTER26
Justin
Trash Panda fans…you guys aren’t going to believe this. I’ve learned SO FREAKIN’ MUCH this week that I’m not sure that there’s enough page space in Trash Can Tattle with Tabitha to tell you everything I need to.
I’m beside myself with just how sweet all this tea is.
Sit down, kick back, and get ready to sink your teeth into some salacious gossip about none other than our very own UCR captain, Justin Ashe.
My blood is cold, my muscles tense, and my friends, my teammates are staring at me as though they’re expecting me to explode at any moment.
I won’t lie, it’s possible.
Rumor has it that our very own Captain America isn’t so squeaky clean after all. He hauled ass out of Minnesota like his feet were on fire to attend UCR in a bid to leave his past behind him, but Trash Panda fans, we all know that your past never stays there. It always catches up to you in the end.
My chest tightens. Did Savannah do this? Did she learn all my truths and then run off to her computer to pound it all out into The Internet? IssheTabitha the tattletale? It feels a little out of character to blame her so quickly. I’ve never had questions about her loyalty or ability to keep secrets before this, but she’s the only person I’ve told recently. The only new entity in this situation.
This reporter heard stories about our beloved captain cheating on more than just his girlfriend in high school.
What the hell? Tabitha has never gone this far across the line before. She’s always been cheeky, brazen, sometimes even a little risqué, but outright trashing someone like this just isn’t her style. The article goes on to out my freakin’ pen name. I can’t believe this.
It has to be Vannah. She has to have told the wrong person. I hate to bethat guy,but this totally stinks of a woman scorned. I wonder who she might have told. Or maybe shediddo it herself.
But why? I told her the truth. I told her that I didn’t do the things I was accused of. Doesn’t she believe me? Or does she just not care? Has this whole thing been a ploy to get close to me to destroy me for something I did when I was a teenager?
Fuck.
Dragging my fingers through my hair, I look up from the article on my phone to the expectant stares of my team.
“None of this is true.”
Someone folds their arms, and another clears his throat, but so far no one has yelled bullshit or started punching my face, so I’m taking the win.
“I was accused of cheating… On Morrison’s sister and my term paper, but it wasn’t true. I let them believe it was true ’cause it was kinda hard to explain myself with O’Brien’s fist crunching my orbital sockets. Plus, when your girlfriend doesn't believe you and your dad doesn't believe you, like right off the bat, then what's the point in even trying to explain? But it wasn’t true. I swear.”
Cold fear trickles down my spine. What if they don’t believe me, like my friends in high school, my teammates. My own fucking father?
How can they play under a captain, a leader they can’t trust?
“We believe you. At least I do.” Scott’s face is firm, his nod resolute. His eyes tell me that for him there is no doubt in his mind that I’m telling the truth. Something uncoils in my chest, and I suck in an unsteady breath.
“I do, too.” Apollo holds my stare before I move my eyes around my team, my family, searching for the disbelief, the uncertainty, but I don’t see it. I could cry. I might cry. I know they wouldn’t care. But in this moment, their support means more to me than I know how to put into words.
“After Finn kicked my ass when he saw what he thought he saw, I was quietly shoved out of social circles. Hockey became hostile, and I couldn’t get a single girl to hang out with me, not even to study, let alone go on a date with me. It was like I had a scarlet letter inked on my forehead, and no one wanted anything to do with me.”
I rub my stomach as the memories assault me from those days. It was awful. I ate lunch alone, I hung out alone, and even if I scored a hat trick at games, my teammates always had that look in their eye as though they were always waiting for me to betray them somehow.
The more they dug their heels in, determined to believe the lies, the harder it got to find a way to clear my name. Especially with the term paper thing. The Molly situation was something that started out as a simple misunderstanding, but it caused an emotional reaction from someone I’d considered to be my friend, and it spiraled out of control.
Someone grabs my shoulder, pulling me out of the past, and I’m damn near nose to nose with Raffi. “We believe you. And even if you did fuck up in high school—which I’m not saying I think you did—we wouldn’t hold it against you. That’s not who we are, it’s not what we do. Everyone does stupid shit when they’re young and thoughtless. It’s how that shapes us into who we are today that matters. We know who you are, Cap. Down deep, in there.” He pats my chest, and it takes all I have not to let the tears welling in my eyes escape and course down my cheeks in front of my boys.
“We’ve played with you for years. One bullshit rumor from your past isn’t going to undo the years of skating by your side.” I don’t know who said that, everyone’s kind of blurry, and I’m trying to swallow down the lump in my throat before I fall apart. I know for sure some of those pesky tears have already escaped and are making a bid for freedom down my cheeks but no one says a word.
“Tabitha has gone too far this time.” Artemis’s face is taut, and his nostrils are flaring. Dude is piiiissed. “I get freedom of speech, but this hurts one of us, and that’s a step too far.”
