‘Believing Logan? And thinking I was cheating on you?’
‘Yes.’ My heart gave a strange squeeze at the words he’d used. Cheating implied a promise broken, but he’d made me no promises.
‘What about pushing me in the river?’
I looked up at him and grimaced at his raised eyebrow. ‘Oh, yeah, that too. I’ve been on fire tonight haven’t I? I’m so sorry.’
He shook his head and pushed some loose strands of hair back from my face. ‘I don’t blame you—’
‘Don’t, Stephen, please, it only makes me feel worse. So what if in the past you’ve had casual sex with half of London? It doesn’t make it okay for your boss to come on to you in that way. She’s in a position of power over you.’
‘I really haven’t slept with half of London,’ he choked out. ‘I just. After Mum…I didn’t like staying home alone.’
My heart squeezed again. ‘I was just exaggerating to make a point, that no matter what you choose to do with your body, it doesn’t give her any rights over you.’
‘Perhaps. But I’ve made choices about how to conduct myself and it’s had consequences. It’s the reason you believed Logan isn’t it?’
Rain started falling then. Big fat irregular drops splatting down around us onto the concrete.
‘That’s not it. It’s because you’re so handsome.’
He snorted. ‘I accept your apology, Noelle; you don’t need to lay it on so thick.’
‘No really. I told you how I never had any boyfriends in high school, how no one ever paid any attention to me? Well, there was one boy who paid attention to me. One very handsome, popular boy. Justin Bickerman.’
His eyes narrowed. ‘And what did Justin Bickerman do?’
‘I was always in the library – obviously – and he started coming in to do his assignments. Then he started talking to me, asking about what I was reading and writing. I couldn’t believe it. This cute boy who all the girls wanted to date, was talking tome. Andthen, he asked me to prom. I was walking on air.’ I swallowed. ‘I spent all my allowance on a new dress, and I waited, and I waited, and he never came to pick me up. Turns out it was all a bet some boys on the football team had made. “Date the Desperates” they called it. They pulled names from a hat and he got me.’
Stephen swore. ‘What little shits.’
I nodded and put my hand to his face, so sharp and masculine and gorgeous. Eyes deep and dark. His mouth sculpted for sin. ‘You can see why I might doubt the motives of a handsome man like yourself? Why would you be interested in me if not to use me or as a cruel joke? I’m a still a chubby, bespectacled, bookish girl inside.’
‘I find you stunning, Noelle, inside and out. Have I ever said anything other than that? Ever acted differently other than when you told me I wasn’t allowed to?’
He hadn’t. When he put it so simply, I searched my memory and he’d never given me any reason to doubt that he was genuinely attracted to me. So what if he hadn’t asked me out first at the hotel? And so what if he didn’t want a long-term relationship with me? He wanted me for as much as he thought he was capable of. This much I knew. Maybe he wasn’t going to be ‘the one’ to settle down and have babies with. But maybe he could be ‘the one’ to convince me that I could genuinely be desirable to a man like him. That was something and wasn’t a waste of time. And if I knew that’s all I was getting from this, surely that would stop it from hurting when it ended?
‘I’m happy to prove it further, too.’ He dipped his head, nudged my nose with his and nipped at my lips.
‘Well, I do like hard evidence,’ I waggled my eyebrows. His mouth lined up with mine, but I put my finger up in between us. ‘Wait.’
‘What’s wrong?’
‘I was sick. Before. On the boat. I can’t kiss you until I’ve brushed and flossed.’
He pressed his lips together. ‘I probably taste of river too.’
I laughed and plucked at his wet clothes, which were only getting damper as the rain grew more persistent. ‘You definitely smell of it.’
‘Sexy.’ He laughed too. ‘Let’s grab a taxi back to my place and get cleaned up.’
‘So we can get dirty again?’
‘Precisely.’
A droplet of rain landed on my hair and slid along my scalp, making me shiver. ‘I doubt we’ll catch a cab in this weather.’
‘Maybe if we hurry. The rain’s still light.’ He caught my hand and started tugging me along the path.
