She unzipped it at the side and held it out carefully, while Beth slipped her dressing gown off and stepped into the dress. Ashleigh pulled it up for her, almost wanting to close her eyes when it came to getting it in place over Beth’s bust and hips. Please God, let it fit. Once in place, she slid the zip up under Beth’s arm, smoothed out the creases and stepped back.
There, itdidfit and…it looked lovely. The tension in Ashleigh’s chest eased a little – her friend was by no means going to look awful walking down the aisle, but, it wasn’t Ashleigh’s opinion that was the most important one.
Beth had gone very quiet. ‘Shall I put on the shoes too? I should put on the shoes.’ Her voice came out a whisper and Ash didn’t want to say anything either. She pulled the ballet slippers out of the shoebox and knelt down, putting them in place and Beth lifted the skirt slightly to step into them.
Ash could barely stand, her legs were so shaky, as Beth walked slowly over to the full-length mirror. There was an agonising pause as Beth stared at herself.
And then she burst into tears.
Ash’s heart fell down to meet the soles of her Doc Martens – her blood was rushing in her ears so much she barely heard Beth’s voice when she turned back to her, wiping her face and smiling through her tears. ‘It’s perfect, Ash. I love it.’ She swallowed and spun back to look in the mirror again, gasping as the skirt twirled out around her legs. ‘It’s so,soperfect. Thank you. Thank you.’
‘Oh Christ,’ Ashleigh pressed her hand to her chest and collapsed onto the double bed. ‘You nearly gave me a heart attack then. I thought I’d ruined your wedding.’
Beth shook her head, meeting her eye in the reflection in the mirror and stroking her hands lightly and gently across the bodice. ‘No. I’m sorry. It’s just so beautiful.Ilook beautiful in it.’
‘You always look beautiful,’ Ashleigh told her and managed to find enough strength to come over and give her a very light hug. ‘But I’m so pleased that it makes you feel it.’ She stood back and asked Beth to turn around in it, walk up and down to make sure it all fit exactly the way it should. ‘I could put a couple of stitches here, to really tuck it in at your waist.’
‘No. No. Like I said it’s perfect. I can breathe in it. I wanted to be able to eat and dance in it, and that’s exactly what you’ve given me.’ Beth’s dark eyes shone, and she bit her lip. ‘I can’t wait for the first dance.’
‘Are you ready yet?’ Her mum’s voice called through the door. ‘Only the other bridesmaids should be arriving in the next half an hour for the rehearsal…and I’m dying to see you.’
‘Okay. Okay. I’ll come out in two minutes.’ Beth called to her mum with a laugh and took a deep breath, wiping her cheeks free of the shine of her happy tears. She grabbed Ashleigh by the shoulders. ‘God, it’s really happening now isn’t it? I’m getting married tomorrow.’
‘Yes, it really is, and you are,’ Ashleigh agreed. ‘How are you feeling?’
‘Emotional.’ Beth laughed and gestured at her tear-streaked face. ‘I can’t help missing my dad and wishing he could be here with us. And I know Nick’s feeling the same way about his mum.’ She sighed and her smile turned a little sad. ‘But I’m also excited. Really excited. I can’t believe this time last year, I didn’t even know Nick and now I’m getting married and I really feel like I…I don’t know…like I’m really living my life. Does that make sense?’
‘It does make sense. But can you bottle that or write me some instructions on how to get it…or does it only come when a dishy pilot falls in love with you?’
Beth shook her head. ‘The dishy pilot helps, but you know what? I think it’s only part of it.Iwas the one who made my life better. Sorry, that sounds really arrogant, but the blizzard and running the hotel…it made me realise I wasn’t a screw-up. Nick could see that, and he told me that, but it wasn’t until I sorted my head out that I realised and I started doing the things I always wanted to do.’
‘I want to drink to that later.’ Ash felt what Beth was saying resonate within her.Shewas changing too. She’d known this Christmas would be different. She’d started reassessing her life and Olivier’s presence and spending time with him had been a catalyst, but the alchemy was going on inside her. Thingsweregoing to get better. She just knew it. Even if her last-ditch attempt to make things work with him didn’t pan out the way she hoped, she was not going to let her life slide by without seeing the beauty in it.
She had family and friends whom she loved, and talent and passion for fashion design. She didn’t know exactly how she was going to make a proper living out of it, but she was going to give it a try. She’d need to go back to university probably and rack up a load of student debt but if she could make a living out of doing something she loved, it would be worth it. It made total sense, and she knew that’s what Olivier had meant when he tried to talk to her about how it brought her joy. She hadn’t felt ready to commit to it until this moment, hadn’t believed she could be good enough at it, until she saw Beth’s reaction and knew that she wanted to re-create that over and over, helping people to feel beautiful and comfortable. She never would have done that if she hadn’t had Olivier’s voice in the back of her head, suggesting that she think about what there was to gain, as well as what there was to lose.
She wanted to speak to him. She wanted to tell him how it had gone and show him the photos and just hear his voice really. She knew she had planned to wait until the wedding and Christmas were out of the way but…all this waiting. What was the point? If she was going to have a relationship with him – if he still wanted to have one with her – she was going to have to get used to phone calls rather than seeing him face to face. Why wait?
After ensuring that Beth looked fresh-faced, they went out and showed Rosie…who promptly burst into tears too. Ash helped Beth back out of the dress, hanging it up carefully ready for the next day, and nipped back down to her room, saying she was going to meet them in the lobby with the other bridesmaids when it was time to go down to the church for the rehearsal. It only gave her twenty minutes, but maybe that was enough? It was going to have to be enough.
It was probably because she’d already had one enormous surge of adrenalin and crashed down from it, that she was able to pick up her phone and dial Olivier’s number without any second thoughts, or chickening out.
But then it went straight to voicemail. She hung up before leaving a message. Oh God, what if he’d blocked her?
No. He was probably working. Of course he was working, getting ready for the dinner service. He’d see she called him. Was that enough? Would he call her back?
She pinched her bottom lip and paced up and down for a moment, looking at the little Christmas tree, her reflection in one of the big silver baubles bending strangely backwards and forwards across the convex surface. Back and forth. Flipping and flopping.
Why leave him wondering why she had called? Why leave it to chance to see if he was curious? She dialled him again. It went to voicemail again and she took a deep breath and started talking.
