‘He walked out on you and your mom? Or she had an affair with him? Either way, you’ve got nothing to feel ashamed about.’
‘He left us. I’ve not seen him since I was three.’
‘What a piece of work.’ She stepped closer, so that I couldn’t avoid looking at her face, and repeated, ‘You’ve gotnoreason to feel ashamed, Stephen. That’s on him, not you.’
‘Are you certain? What was it you said about me? You’re not sure “guys like me” know how to do anything other than flirt?’
‘Flirting is not siring children and abandoning them to move halfway across the world. You wouldn’t do that, would you?’
‘I don’t know.’ I shrugged. ‘It’s why I don’t get in too deep. I don’t want to hurt anyone.’
Elle pressed her lips together hard before she spoke again. ‘You know what we need?’
‘Please, God, don’t make me go on a Ferris wheel again.’
Her laugh erupted from her, loud with surprise and what sounded like relief. ‘No, I promise. There’s a great place that sells lemon ice on the way to my parents’. We’ll get some, you’ll give me the full details and then I’ll take you to the barbecue and we’ll ask my dad for a favour.’
‘He’s not in the Mafia, is he? That woman was unpleasant, but I don’t want her offed.’
‘There’s my Stephen back.’ She reached up and patted my cheek, her grey eyes reflecting the expanse of clear blue sky above us.
HerStephen. That sounded so wonderful but so unobtainable. A gift I’d never really receive because we both knew I didn’t deserve it; she was just trying to cheer me up.
She linked her arm through mine and led me towards the pedestrian crossing. ‘No. My dad is the opposite of the Mafia. He’s a detective. And if we ask him, really,really, nicely, he might do a little search of the official records for us. But I need you to be on your top charming form. So, what we need is lemon ice.’
Chapter Thirty
Elle
Ineeded it just as much as Stephen did. So much for priding myself on being observant; a regular Sherlock HolmesIwas. That woman at the market had figured it out by looking at the old photo – the one I’d stared at for an hour while I made up the poster. And that hadn’t been the only clue; potential long lost ex-boyfriend of his mother’s, him insisting on finding the man himself rather than using his lawyers, and his low mood, seemingly instigated every time we got a step closer.
But it wasn’t just being a step closer that had bothered him, it was all the stories, too. The casual words thrown around like ‘ladies’ man’ to describe someone who was technically his father, though certainly never acted like it. Stephen and his mother had had their hearts broken by this man. He’d wanted to track him down and I’d been thinking we were just on a jolly mystery hunt that was helping me get inspired for my book. All the while playing a one-upping game and never giving him a break about anything; not his occupation, or his love life, his occasional bad moods or early bird habits. No wonder he didn’t believe me when I told him he had nothing to be ashamed about. Another award-winning example of the mixed-messaging I was giving him.
Oh my God, I was such an asshole.
I took him to the little pizza place that sold ice-creams out of a hatch during the day and bought him an enormous lemon ice cone. It was the least I could do.
He took a lick obediently and his eyes widened. Suddenly he was back in the room with me. It was like magic – that bittersweet kick.
‘What did I tell you?’ I took a lick myself, the cool sourness making my mouth water. Blue and yellow colours danced before my eyes as the world grew sharper.
‘It’s very good. Weirdly, exactly what I needed, thank you.’ He took another couple of licks and smiled; his lips invitingly reddened by the cold. ‘So, all this time, you’ve had this card about your dad being a detective tucked in your back pocket?’
‘Yeah, I guess…’ I looked at him from the sides of my eyes as we started walking again, wondering where he was going with this. Was he mad?
‘Why did you want to go traipsing all over the city with me, then? When you could just ask your dad?’
‘Well, first off, it isn’t that easy. He doesn’t do this sort of thing lightly. He’s a very good police officer. He cares. He does a good job and doesn’t abuse his power. Before, there wasn’t a good enough reason to ask him.’
‘But now you have my sob story, you can?’ His tone was noticeably bland.
‘Please don’t be offended, Stephen. My friend looking for some random guy is not as compelling as my friend looking for his biological father, is it?’
‘I suppose not.’
‘And also…I was enjoying myself.’ I gave him a rueful smile. ‘I wish I’d known you weren’t.’
‘I’m sorry I didn’t tell you.’
