Before I can second-guess myself for the twelve hundredth time, I send my thesis off to the committee, grab a pair of heels, and go rescue Cosmos. Hopefully, Mom hasn’t embarrassed me too much.
When I come back out to the living room, they’re laughing. That’s good. But Mom’s still coughing a lot. I hope she’s not getting sick.
“That’s just the start of it,” Mom says. “She was so nervous she kept her hands like this through the whole solo, without even realizing she was doing it.” Mom cups her breasts to show him the weird way I stood during my fifth-grade choir recital.
“Mooooom!” I can’t believe she told him that story. “I was eleven! And it was soothing.” I grab my coat and forcefully shove my arms in the sleeves.
Cosmos opens the front door, still chuckling at Mom’s story. “It was great to see you again, Mrs. Berton.”
Light rain drizzles down on us as we step outside. Cosmos rests his hand on my elbow as if to steady me on the slick steps.
“Don’t be home too late.” Mom’s voice is casual and teasing, but I know she doesn’t sleep well when I’m out. We should try to be back before ten. I don’t want her staying up just for me.
Cosmos opens my car door, and I slip inside and buckle my belt. Mom stands on the front steps, just out of the rain, waving. She coughs, and the wave turns into an attempt to shield her mouth with her elbow. She looks pale. Maybe this was a bad idea. Maybe I shouldn’t leave her tonight.
Cosmos walks around the front of the car, and I try to calm my frayed nerves. I’m not just worried about Mom. It’s also Cosmos. And my thesis. And everything. I feel like there’s a volatile little girl inside of me, and if I’m not careful, she’s going to burst out and ruin the best thing in my life right now.
Cosmos starts up the car. “You okay?”
“Hmmmhmmm.” I bite the fleshy side of my thumb hard, trying to quell my nerves.
Cosmos fiddles with the radio and then gives up, apparently dissatisfied with every radio station he tries. We drive in silence for a couple of minutes, that vulnerable girl inside of me growing more anxious with every passing second.
“I’m sorry. I don’t think I’m going to be much fun tonight. We can do this another time if you want,” I say, unable to keep quiet anymore.
Cosmos glances at me, then back at the road. “You know you don’t have to be fun, right?”
“Yeah, right.” I don’t say it sarcastically, just deflated.
He takes my hand in his and squeezes. “I want to get to know you, Hazel. As you are, right now.” He lets go of my hand to flip on the blinker and turns onto University Way.
“So, where are we going?” If I have any hope of getting through this, I need to change the subject before I end up spilling my fragile insides all over Cosmos.
“You remember what I told you I wanted to be when I was little?”
“A superhero?”
“The other thing.”
I try to think back to the conversation weeks ago in the hospital garden, but I can’t come up with anything, so I shake my head.
His smile broadens. “Good. It’ll be a surprise.”
It turns out Cosmos’ surprise is a nondescript brick building on the south side of the university. As soon as he opens the door, music pours out into the night. We step into an open room with hardwood floors and dim lighting. Small round tables are set up along the walls, leaving the center of the room open. A handful of couples fill the space.
One breaks from the crowd, spinning closer to us. The woman wraps one leg around her partner, and I swear her other foot is completely off the ground as he twirls her by her waist directly into a dip. It’s mesmerizing and sexy, and there’s no way I can move like that. I’ve always wished I could dance, but I was born with two left feet and not enough body awareness to keep from running into things.
Cosmos takes off his coat, every move fluid and graceful. I’ve noticed how he moves before, but now it makes even more sense.
“Do you come here often?” I almost have to yell to be heard over the music.
He brushes his lips against my ear as he helps me out of my coat. “Not in years.”
Coming around in front of me, he tilts my chin up so I’m looking at him. The room goes blissfully quiet.The dancers behind Cosmos freeze in lovely, intricate shapes, bodies in varying degrees of connection.
“I know you’re not a fan of loud places?—”
“How did you know?”
