Her comment made me chuckle. Mila was funny with her big brown eyes and big, tousled hair, full of sass. But she was wise beyond her years, likely from having to grow up quickly.
I rubbed the back of my neck and said sheepishly, “I think I met someone.”
I knew instantly that my cheeks flared red with the admission. I couldn’t even look her in the eyes for the fear I felt for adoring a girl so deeply. I don’t think I’ve ever felt this way about someone.
“I’ve just fallen. Like a chump.” I chuckled. “She is perfect. Like, she doesn’t give me my way, which is infuriating and challenging, but she makes no qualms about my irritation and optimism. She is everything I’m not,” I admit, giving more than I had wanted to originally.
Mila’s grin was infectious. “Sounds like you’re cheesin’.”
I laughed. “Yeah. Maybe I am.”
“She must be something to have your panties in a twist.”
“Ohhh kay, my panties are in no twist, I’ll have you know,” I announce, rolling my eyes. “But, she’s definitely got me in her clutches. Maybe I’ll bring her around someday.”
The moment I said it out loud, I knew it couldn’t happen.
My mother would connect the dots. Not that that would matter as a fully consenting adult. However, she would be disheartened by my lack of self-control when it came to her inadvertent patients. She would probably lose her shit, and my dad would fucking explode. It would be chaos, all at the expense of Lennon. I couldn’t do that to her.
“I should get some rest,” Mila finally said, appearing calmer.
I nod. “Yeah, me too. It’s been a night, that’s for sure.”
She paused at the stairs. “Sure has been…By the way, you should get your nose looked at. It hasn’t stopped bleeding, and that seems too long for it to keep going, you know? Maybe it’s broken?”
In the pit of my stomach, I knew why the blood hadn’t stopped. It had nothing to do with a broken nose, and everything to do with my defective heart.
“Yeah,” I lied softly, “I’ll get it looked at tomorrow.”
She attempted to leave again.
“Oh, and Mila?”
She glanced back, exhaustion seeping into her eyes.
“Thank you. For taking care of this family. Even if we’re brand new.”
Mila gave me a tired smile before turning to make her way upstairs. I sat there, the taste of iron apparent in my throat, conflicted at how many of us were slowly breaking at the very same time.
Lennon
Sessions had been going along smoothly. We were nearing the halfway point—at least, I thought we were. I’d stop counting the days and began measuring time by the heaviness that was lightened from my shoulders. I could almost reach out and touch the weight that was lifted off of me. It felt tangible.
I could see an end in sight.
I could also see myself smiling more. More happy. More easy days. More.
Asher and I were officiallysomething—at least until our time was up.
An eerie thought crept in more often than I liked though. I wasn’t sure if I was feeling relieved over the end being near…or if I was terrified that the happiness blooming inside of me had Asher’s fingerprints all over it.
Could it be…him?
No. I refused to believe that.
The session was wrapping up when I scanned the room and found baby blues, full of angst, already locked on mine. What the hell was he thinking about? It couldn’t have been anything wholesome. It couldn’t be anything less than R-rated. His eyelids lowered lazily, but there was nothing tired about the look he gave me.
It was eagerness. Impatience. Needing…me?
