I gathered up the stones and left with a polite nod.I was eager to visit Loric’s gold and then several other rooms to disguise my visit before making it back to my chamber.If I were quick, I could be tucked away in my own space before the moon grew entirely shy and the palace was overcome with heretical chants and whispers.There was a song I was working on… a Norsern tune that I wanted to translate to the lyre with some Islish flair.I would have the day to devote to it.
I found Loric’s gold unharmed, the tiny feather I’d left in the narrow crevice beneath the door unmoved, letting me know that no one had been in or out since I’d last checked.
No sooner had I returned to my chamber and closed my door did I hear the palace quieting.I had a sharp jolt of fear, which was something that had been happening a lot as I imagined answering questions from the order upon my return.
I need to practise my responses, I told myself yet again.I would have to lie, I knew that, but I would have to lie carefully.Who was to say what my order knew of King Arik or his court?I paced in a panic for some time before the sound of humming in the hall outside distracted me.It wasn’t a casting, rhythmic hum as was usual on the shy moon, but something lazy and meandering.A tune of pleasure.I recognized the voice…
There was a knock.
Surely not, I thought.All the same, my heart changed tempo.
I opened the door, and he was there.
Fell.
I think I had convinced myself he didn’t look as I remembered him looking, but seeing him‚ the lazy slant of his shoulders, the way he held his head back, the thickness of the muscles in his throat…
I was swarmed with sudden rage.Looking back, I think it wasn’t sudden at all.This man was my captor after all, my apparent guardian.And then, after I’d stood in his presence, feeling all that came with being near him, he’d abandoned me.
“Hello,” he said.“I have heard you speak Norsern now?”
“To some people,” I said, coldly.
He grinned.
Are you fucking jesting?
“Do you speak to fools?”he said.
Owl-face, I reminded myself.Keep your owl-face on.“Almost never.”
“Can now be one of the almosts?”
Stop.Stop.Stop.Go now.
He laughed.“You have summoned me.Please do not send me away again.”
I couldn’t say anything to that because it didn’t make sense, so I stood there looking at him.A long time, it seemed.But also, endlessly short.I’d forgotten the feeling of his presence, the landscape of his face.Remembering was… difficult.
“If there is a task you want done, I will do it,” he said, taking the smallest step forward, not quite into my chamber, but closer to the door.
I couldn’t think.His presence was an unhinged thing to me.His voice… I took a step back, keeping the space between us.
He stopped and retreated the small distance he’d come.“I have done you a great harm.I should like to make medicine for it.”
“Yes, you have,” I said.“And then, you left me here—this is a tricky place.”
His smile disappeared.His voice softened.“You sent me away.”
I couldn’t ignore the absurdity of the statement a second time.“How could I have done that?I could not speak to you.”
He shrugged.“I knew you wanted me to leave.I am not sure how.Just like I knew you wanted me to return.I dreamt you put on the bracelet I made you.That you wanted protection.”
I blinked three times and buried all thought of dreaming.And then, because he had already shown himself to be incredulously stupid, I decided none of what we were talking about mattered.He’d offered to do anything I asked, so I said, “If I ask you to secure me passage home before the king has permitted it, and you do it, what will King Arik do to you?”
Fell shrugged a second time, his grin creeping back onto his face.“He will yell and then forgive.This is our way.”
“This is my request then,” I said.
