And that's the fucking problem. Because this is not how it was supposed to go. I was supposed to break her. I was supposed to watch her shatter, make her crawl, destroy her piece by piece until there was nothing left of the girl I used to love.
Instead, I’m standing here, holding her, feeling her heartbeat slow under my palm.
For the first time in thirteen fucking years, I feel something other than rage. Other than darkness. It's something worse.Because I should have seen it coming. I should have known it was only a matter of time before she got inside my head again.
I felt it creeping in before, in the cell. But of course, I thought I was strong enough to resist. Because I forgot how fucking addictive she is. How her touch used to dispel the darkness inside me even back then. I thought she wouldn't have that power anymore.
But I was wrong, and I am so fucking done for.
I can feel it deep in the marrow of my bones.
Fuck!
Bones!
He's going to lose his fucking mind when he finds out about this. Especially that we fucked.
I need a new plan. A better one. A smarter one. Something that keeps me from falling straight into the fucking trap she doesn't even know she's setting.
"Let's go to bed," I murmur against her skin, my voice muffled. "We'll talk tomorrow."
She nods. Still silent. Still letting me hold her.
I press my lips to her shoulder. Soft, slow, barely a kiss. Then I straighten, pulling myself together, forcing logic, forcing fucking control.
We wash each other, and it’s comforting in a strange way. Her hands explore me, and mine do the same to her.
It's too fucking quiet between us.
Before we leave the shower, her fingers spread over my chest.
I still.
She wants to say something, but she doesn't know how to ask. Then, slowly, she looks up, and I see the worry behind her eyes. The question.
"No more dungeon, Adora." My voice is low, rough. A whispered promise.
Because the dungeon part is over. I can't go back to that plan. I need to calm my fucking thoughts and figure out what the hell happens next.
We step out together. I pat her dry, wrapping a towel around her before leading her into my bedroom. And it's only when I stop near the bed that I realize how much I just fucked myself over. Because this entire house will smell like her now. The sheets. The walls. Everything.
Years of planning, waiting, hunting, wasted in one second. Because she still fucking lives under my skin in a way that she shouldn't.
I sigh, dragging a hand through my wet hair.
I need control. I need distance. I need to fucking think.
Instead, I turn to her and break the silence first.
"You know the rules. No clothes in bed."
She smiles, just a little. A sad, nostalgic kind of smile.
"Yeah. I remember." She rolls her eyes at me. "And I also don't have any clothes, duh."
I move closer, my hand curling around the side of her throat. Her pulse jumps beneath my thumb.
"Things changed tonight, Adora," I murmur. "But that doesn't mean you can leave. Yet."
