Ren had already conditioned me to expect—no, crave—pain with my pleasure. More tears dripped down my face. He wasn’t here to destroy me and never would be again.
“Bite,” I whispered.
KC popped off my chest, and I whimpered.
“Focus on me. We aren’t going to think about him.” Tears gleamed in his eyes, too.
“Let’s not lie to each other.”
His face crumpled, then smoothed out. A tear broke free and slid down his cheek, and my dick punched against my pants in response. I didn’t want to make KC cry, but the tears were part of the swirl of sex in my mind, and thanks to Ren, on some level, I thought they should signal good things to come.
They should, but tonight, they didn’t.
Excitement burned hotter in my gut, but a bitter sensation slithered through me. I smiled while KC frowned.
“I’m never going to see tears again without thinking of Ren.”
“Sweetheart, come here.” He cupped the back of my head and drew me in for a harsh kiss. I fell into it. If everything was goingto remind me of Ren, even being with KC—which on its own would’ve felt like a moon shot a month ago—I might as well just do this. KC was sad, too. If we electrocuted each other with our terrible feelings, perhaps we would come out the other side fried but alive.
His hands slid to my belt, and he leaned back to glance down as he unbuckled it.
“Do you think he always wanted to hurt us? Did he hope he would make me panic that night with the chair?” My heart thudded in my ears.
KC grimaced as my pants fell. He pushed my boxers down, and I kicked the clothes away. Despite everything—or who knows, maybe I enjoyed all pain? Emotional pain? Perhapsbecauseof everything—my cock was rock hard and drooling.
He wrapped his hand around my shaft, and the surge of pleasure that fired through me had more tears pooling in my eyes.
He huffed. “Maybe? Ren took care of me, though. Why would someone who wanted to hurt me worry about my health?” His brow furrowed and I hated the way his breath caught.
“No fun breaking toys that are already trashed.” Even as I said the words, I knew they didn’t fit the concern I’d seen from Ren, but everything that happened earlier had me questioning my whole life.
Tears trembled on KC’s eyelashes and he shook his head.
“Baby? Let’s.... Like you said, let’s focus on us. We’re real, right?”
“Right.” KC’s lips twisted into a crooked half smile.
I wanted that spark of happiness, so I attacked his mouth, tried to consume whatever emotion had caused the gray clouds to part. I bruised my lips on his, chased the bite of pain, but he softened our embrace and ran his hands up and down my back. Iwas hard and dripping, and this was perfect and terrible and not enough and just too fucking much.
No matter how hard I sucked on his tongue or thrust into his mouth, he didn’t nip at me. Anger began to build in my chest for wanting Ren when I had a sweet football god right here. I clawed at KC’s clothes, and he helped me get rid of them. A sense of accomplishment had me grinning as I tossed away his socks.
KC pulled me close and rolled me onto the bed on top of himself. His skin pressed to mine was soothing, and he was firm in all the best places. A tease of delicious tension spilled through me as I ground against his abs, smearing precum all over him.
Instinct took over, thank fuck. Some of the bullshit in my brain went silent as we got down to business. KC spread his legs, and I slid lower, gliding my throbbing hard-on against his. We were so ready for each other that we didn’t need lube to slick things up. I rubbed against him until we were both a panting mess, but the stupid tears wouldn’t go away. Sweat stung my eyes, but that only made things worse.
KC wrapped his arms around me and surrounded me, protected me from my doubts. Of course KC wanted me. He was here with me, and we were both miserable because of the same man. If that didn’t say he gave a shit about me, nothing did.
“Make me come,” I said.
He grinned, a peek of his real self. “You’re bossy when it’s just us.”
My heart plummeted. “Guess we should get used to it.”
He didn’t say anything, just held me tight and rutted his thick cock against mine. My entire body was on edge. I was straining for the top of the mountain when he licked his palms, then slid his hands between us and cradled our dicks.
“Oh!”
He chuckled, a low, rich sound.
