Chapter 16
King/Dante
I went to sleep Thursday night with Ella on my mind and woke up with a smile on my face and morning wood that was damned impressive for a man my age. It was too bad she wasn’t here to help me with it.
A short time later, I parked in the clubhouse lot and strode inside. I detoured to the kitchen to grab a cup of coffee before settling down at my desk to tackle the mountain of paperwork that never seemed to go away. Bull was drinking one of his nasty-as-fuck protein shakes, Irish was at the stove scrambling some eggs, and Lucky had his head stuck in the fridge, looking for something to eat. He apparently didn’t find what he was looking for, because he slammed the door shut and went into the walk-in pantry instead. Joker was standing at the counter fixing a bowl of cereal, looking bleary-eyed and hungover as hell.
“Aren’t you starting that installation for the Rossi’s new club today?” I asked him with a frown. Joker worked for Brick at our security company, Guardian Angel Protection, installing commercial security and surveillance systems.
“Nah, Brick called me first thing. Something about the building inspector. I was still half-asleep, so I didn’t really catch it all, but the job was postponed until Monday.
I nodded an acknowledgement as I poured myself a cup, then leaned against the counter to drink it. Lucky wandered back out of the pantry with a loaf of bread. He reached for the toaster, then had the brass balls to ask me if I had any of Ella’s jam left.
“Not for you I don’t, jackass. She said she has more, if you want to buy some.”
“Oh man, that was some good shit. Viking told me about the pot roast she made for dinner the other night, too. I caught a glimpse of her when I replaced that faulty alarm keypad at Sinner’s place a few days ago, and she’s fuckin’ hot. I mean, she has an ass that don’t quit. I’m telling you, Prez, you’d better not let this one get away.”
“And I’m telling you, Joker, if you talk about her ass again, I’ll knock you flat on yours.” The only thing keeping me from doing just that was the shit-eating grin on his face that told me he was just trying to yank my chain.
He raised his hands in a gesture of surrender as the other three men laughed at him.
“So, how’s the courtship goin’, Prez? Have you managed to win the lady over yet? If not, my offer to wife her up still stands.” I shot daggers at Bull, but the others found him hilarious, so I glared at them, too.
They’d all been busting my balls about Ella, ever since Cowboy opened his big, fat, fucking mouth about the flower deliveries. He had a grand old time regaling them about the whole thing, and I’d gotten nothing but shit about it since then.
There are some hardcore clubs where the presidents demanded and received absolute respect and obedience, otherwise the brothers risk catching a bullet for their insubordination. We weren’t one of those MCs, but there were times I’d wished we were this week.
Viking had started a betting pool on Monday, with the brothers placing bets on everything from whether Ella would give in, what day it would happen if she did, and how much money I’d spend on flowers in the meantime. Most of them had already lost, since they hadn’t expected her to hold out this long. That’s when the jokes had started that I was losing my touch with the ladies.
Trick and Bodhi wandered in then, and Trick went straight for the blender. He drank the same protein shit Bull did. Bodhi, on the other hand, grabbed the box of Pop-Tarts from the pantry and proceeded to eat them straight out of the package. I grimaced and rolled my eyes at both of them.
“Things are going according to plan, brother. That’s all you need to know,” I answered Bull. “By the way, since I have so many of you here, I’d like to discuss the nuggets of piss-poor advice you’ve all been jotting down on that notepad on the refrigerator.”
It was supposed to be used for a grocery list in the community kitchen, but these assholes had come up with a new use for it. Before I’d left yesterday, I’d noticed a new list up there, titled “How to Get King Laid”.
“Now, while I appreciate your concern for my love life, it’s not fuckin’ necessary to give me advice, especially since not a damned one of you has managed to have a successful relationship yet. I’d also like to remind you that although your notes were anonymous, there is a camera in here and in my office, so I know exactly whose asses to kick if it keeps up.”
I zeroed my gaze on my nephew, who was too busy brushing toast crumbs off his shirt to notice. “Lucky, I suggest you return the fuckin’Dating for Dummiesbook you left on my desk, so you can get your damned money back.”
He froze mid-swipe, then his eyes darted to Trick before throwing him under the bus.
“Trick gave it to me, Prez. I just delivered it.”
Trick tried to smack him upside the head, but Lucky laughed and ducked out of reach. Trick shook his head as he looked at me, then shifted the blame to my son. “It was Jagger’s idea.” Now, that didn’t surprise me at all. I’d given Jag all kinds of shit when he’d fucked up with Molly early on, so it was only natural that he’d dish some of that shit back my way now.
I snatched the list from the front of the refrigerator and glanced over it, then noticed Viking leaning over the pass-through counter that connected the kitchen to the main common room. Cowboy wandered up to stand next to him, so we’d gathered quite an audience.
My gaze swiveled to Joker, who stopped slurping the milk from his bowl when Bull nudged him to get his attention. “I recognize the chicken scratch you try to pass off as handwriting, asshole, so this fucking gem is clearly from you. “Tell the bitch that you’re the boss, and that if she won’t do as she’s told, you’ll find a club bunny who will.” Bull barked a laugh, Bodhi’s eyebrows hit his hairline, and Irish winced. Lucky and Trick just looked relieved to be off the hot seat.
“That explains a lot about why you havethreeformer Ol’ Ladies, Joker. It also explains why you’re going to keep your fuckin’ stupid-ass ideas to yourself the next time Ella’s around.”
I skimmed the list again, finding another note written in a familiar scrawl. “Have you considered that Ella may be into younger men? I’d be happy to test out that theory.” Bodhi suddenly found his Pop-Tarts fascinating, judging by the way he ducked his head and stared at them.
“Bodhi, if you want to live to be an old man, you won’t make that offer again.”
“You know, Prez, at your age, it’s natural to start havin’ a little boner trouble. If you’re havin’ trouble sealin’ the deal with Ella, I can hook you up with some of those knockoff Viagra pills I get from Mexico. One of those things will perk your pecker right up, guaranteed.”
The only good thing about Viking’s comment was that it shocked Joker, Trick, Bodhi, and Lucky so much that they all started choking on their food. Bull and Irish froze and tried to pretend they were invisible, and Cowboy laughed so hard he looked like he was in grave danger of shitting himself. Viking was pleased as hell with the chaos he’d caused, and just grinned even wider when I flipped him off.
