“I won’t let you push me away again. No matter what the doctor told you today.”
He managed a bit of a smile. In the midst of all this turmoil, he’d gotten good news. “The glioma hasn’t changed. They think the headache was brought on by stress and the pressure changes in the plane.”
Dani let out a huge exhale and pressed her hand to her chest. “Oh, thank God. I’m so relieved to hear that.”
She peered up into his eyes and took his hand. “And I have something that I need to tell you. Something I should have told you a long time ago that I don’t want to keep inside anymore. Colin and Cameron are your sons.”
He scanned her face as she waited for his response. She was so nervous and uncertain it nearly broke his heart. “They’re mine? Really?” He couldn’t have disguised the excitement in his voice if he’d wanted to. He’d been unprepared for how good it was going to feel to get this news.
She unleashed a relieved smile. “I never should’ve kept that from you, and I’m sorry. But I was sure you wanted nothing to do with me, ever.”
Cole let her words wash over him, soaking them up. This was confirmation that he had no more time to waste. There was a whole lot of life waiting for him, and he didn’t want to spend another minute of it worrying about what might be. “The glioma is why I ended things. Every minute you spent taking care of me felt like confirmation that you deserved a long life with someone who could give that to you. I couldn’t promise you that I would be around.”
Dani’s eyes were so soft and caring. It was like he could see how big her heart was. “So what’s the prognosis now?” She sat back down on the top step and Cole joined her, taking her hand.
He launched into the technical side of his condition, or at least the parts he could remember. “I still feel a little bit like a ticking time bomb, but Sam and I had a good talk at the hospital. I’m sorry I didn’t have the chance to tell you more before they whisked me off for my MRI. Everything happened so fast.”
“It’s okay. I understand so much more now. You were in an incredibly tight spot.” There were tears in her eyes when she looked at him. “And I’m so sorry you didn’t feel like you could tell me. That’s why you told me there was another woman, isn’t it? That’s why you didn’t answer my letter.”
He squeezed her hand tightly. “I need you to know that both of those things were hard for me. Very hard. I thought it was for your own good.”
“You can do some really stupid things, Cole Sullivan.” She added a sweet smile, just to let him know she was giving him a hard time for fun.
“Yeah. I realize that now. Being protective isn’t always my best quality.”
“No. I think it’s one of your best.” Dani cast her sights off in the distance, holding on to his hand just as tightly he was holding on to hers. In that single touch he knew exactly how badly they needed each other. “I came close to telling you about the boys when I wrote that letter. That might’ve changed everything.”
“It absolutely would’ve changed everything. Why didn’t you?”
“Because I wanted you to want to be with me out of love, not because you felt obligated.”
“I never stopped loving you, Dani. And it would’ve been impossible for me to not feel obligated. Even if we didn’t work out, I still would’ve been their daddy.”
She nodded. “I can see now that it wasn’t the right call, but at the time, I couldn’t see another way. Those boys are the best thing that has ever happened to me, but they’ve also been my greatest trial.”
The thought of Dani doing the work of both parents for all these years made it hard for Cole to get past the lump in his throat. Talk about his male ego getting in the way—he really hated the thought of not living up to his responsibilities, even if he hadn’t known they’d existed. Regardless of how things played out with Dani, he had a lot to make up for. “Because you were raising them on your own.”
“Well, there’s that, but that’s not the real reason. It’s been hard because I had to look into their eyes every day and see the face of the man I loved. It was like being haunted by the ghost of Cole Sullivan.”
Cole had to laugh, but it wasn’t funny. This was something born out of deep frustration with himself. “I think I’ve been living with that same ghost. I was so sure I was going to die that I think I stopped living. But that all changed the night you showed up on this porch in that ridiculously sexy red dress. It was like you brought me back to life that night.”
“I turned you down that night. And I called you a mistake.”
“Sometimes it’s the cruelest things that remind you you’re alive.” He turned to her, studying her sweet face and those tempting lips. He couldn’t wait another second to kiss her. He wanted to start their new chapter right here and right now. “But for right now, I’d like to go for a good reminder that I’m still here.”
Twelve
Sitting there on Cole’s font porch, Dani’s mind was running a million miles a minute, thinking about the suffering he’d done all alone, when they could have been together. A less charitable woman might be berating him right now, but Dani was done with being mad. She just wanted to move on with the man she loved.
He pulled her into his arms and placed the softest kiss on her lips. It felt like a new beginning, a hello, a beautiful fresh start. It was exactly what they both needed so badly. It left her heart pulsing like crazy, full of good feelings that had been gone for far too long.
Cole gently pulled his lips away and rested his forehead against hers, but he was still holding on tight. “I never stopped loving you, Dani. Not even for a minute. I just had to protect you. Now I can see how foolish that was.”
She gripped both sides of his face and looked up into his incredible blue eyes. For as tough as Cole was, his eyes had always revealed kindness. They were the way in. “I’m ready to put that all behind us. I think we could both use a fresh start.”
“As long as you understand there are no guarantees.”
She could hardly believe he was still couching this. “I hate to break this to you, but there are no guarantees with any man, especially not one foolish enough to want to run around and chase bad guys like Richard Lowell.”
