“And my daughter was born soon after.”
“Fiona, right?”
His face lit up in a way I'd never seen before. “She's brilliant. Absolutely the best thing that ever happened to me.” Eamon gathered his napkin in his hand and set it down on the table. “I’m sorry about the letter, Katherine. I don't know what else to say about it.”
I waved it off. “Don't beat yourself up over it. It can't be undone now. Let's just focus on the future.” Had I really said that? Me?
He smiled wide. “Yes. I want that more than anything.” He gathered his napkin in his hand and placed it on the table. “But here's where it gets tricky. I thought about this for a long time last night. About what I was going to say today. I can only do this if you want it, too. If this isn't something you're really, truly willing to explore, I can't do it. I mean really try. Heart, eyes, and mind open.”
I sucked in a deep breath, feeling my own shoulders fold up around my ears. You know those moments when you have to ask yourself what you truly want? And the answer always seems just out of reach? This was one of those moments.
“Of course, my thought process was different last night,” he continued. “I didn't know about the letter then. I'd always thought you'd just left and forgotten about me.”
“I thought the same thing.” The sense of loss was profound right now. It felt like a weight on my heart that might never go away.
He rose from his seat, leaned down and planted his palm flat against the side of my neck. His thumb rested in the indentation before my ear, fingers curled at my nape. “I never stopped wanting you, Katherine. I never stopped wanting this.” His eyelids were heavy, and I knew exactly what that meant. A single glance at his lips and I could feel how soft they were before they landed on mine.
I wasn't prepared, however, for the way we both so fully surrendered to the kiss. His lips were like heaven, and I'd been away from them for far too long. I craned my neck and dropped my napkin to have more of him, clutching his shoulders and pulling him down. He dropped to his knees and we drove our shoulders into each other—the opposite of a tug of war, like we were trying to see if one of us could possibly get closer. He angled his head and took the kiss deeper. We weren't just hungry for each other. We were starving. Like neither of us had eaten. Ever. For a moment I was back in Ireland, young and feeling free. For a moment, I felt like me.
We wrenched our lips apart as if we'd been glued together. Our foreheads rested against each other, both of us breathless and restless. Dazed. I would've kept my eyes closed forever and just relived that feeling if I didn't want to see the things his face could tell me.
“After that kiss, I'd be an idiot if I said I didn't want to explore this.” I had to lighten the mood. It was my defense mechanism. My impulse when I was overwhelmed.
Eamon laughed quietly and dropped back, sitting on his heels. “I’d do anything to take you in that bed right now.”
So do it.“I’d be lying if I said I didn't want you to.” I bit down on my lower lip, hard, just to tell myself that this was really happening. My breath picked up again. My pulse throbbed in my throat.
He shook his head, his hands gathered in his lap almost as if he was praying. “I can't do it. This second chance means too much to me. I feel like it'll ruin everything if we sleep together.”
I supposed somebody had to be the responsible adult in the room, but it was still a total letdown. “So now what?”
“Finish breakfast and I send you on your way. You have my number. If you want this, you call me. And if you don't, then don’t.”
“Well, why wouldn't I want it?” Was there something he wasn't telling me?
“I don't know the circumstances of your life, Katherine. I want this, but I can't barge in and tell you I think we should pick up where we were a decade ago. Call me if you're serious. We’ll spend a few weeks talking on the phone, getting reacquainted, and I'll see you when I come back to New York. By that point, we should have a pretty good idea of whether or not this will work. And if not, at least we had the chance to reconnect.”
“That's it?”
He nodded emphatically. “That's it. I don't want to mess with fate.”
Chapter Five
Believe it or not,I actually managed to go to work after I left Eamon at the Four Seasons. I wasn't much use though, which was not good since Miles Ashby, the UK’s golden boy, had arrived. Unfortunately, Miles was just as arrogant as his reputation and name suggested. I hadn't had any direct contact with him yet: I just stood in the conference room while he, his starched shirt, and his head of non-moving hair talked about us coming together as a team and hitting home runs and every other bad sports analogy you could imagine. It was all a bit ridiculous. Mr. Ashby didn't look as though he'd played a sport in all his life.
Afterward, I returned to my office and tried to get lost in some of my projects, but I was too stuck on everything Eamon had said about trying and being serious. Had that really happened to me? Had he really said those things? Even more important, had he meant them? Right now, there were far more questions than answers.
I got home around six, and Amy came barging through our door a half hour later. She kicked it shut behind her, tossed her bag and keys on the chair, and bugged her baby blues at me. “So? Eamon? What happened?”
I'd had a good eight hours to process the breakfast date, and I still wasn't totally sure. I swallowed a sip of my wine and set my glass on the coffee table, deciding it was best to start small. “It was great.”
“That text you sent me was the worst, by the way. Had a good time? What does that even mean?”
“What was I supposed to say? And you were at work. I didn't want to bother you. You're always giving me shit when I send you long, rambling texts.”
“For this, I would've cut you some slack.” She planted herself on the couch next to me and flipped her pumps from her feet. They tumbled under the coffee table. “So, again. Tell me. What happened? How was it?” She nearly went full-on chin-hands with me. I had to admit I loved the chance to gossip with her, but this was so personal, it felt too raw to gush and squeal. A lot had happened. Heavy stuff of consequence.
“It was great. But strange. But also awesome. What do you want to know? The highlights?”
