“Happy to do whatever you guys need. I'm there for you.” I loaded up my fork with curry and took a big bite.
“So, Katherine, are you ready to meet my family at the engagement party next week? They can be a bit of a handful,” Luke said.
I choked. And then I sucked in a lungful of Thai chiles. The heat registered first in my brain.This is not medium. This is Chernobyl.My throat was engulfed in fire. My eyes flooded with water. I slurped down some wine, but it just spread the heat. I flapped my hand, fanning the air in front of my lips. As if that was going to help. “Water. Need water.” I scrambled to my knees and ran into the kitchen, fighting back the urge to stick my face under the faucet. I poured myself a glass of water and downed it, but it only helped a little.
“Drink milk,” Luke said, nearly as frantic as I was. “It will help to dilute the capsaicin.”
“I don't have any milk,” I gasped. Even breathing hurt right now. “I have half and half. I'm not drinking that.”
“Ice cream?”
I nodded furiously as I poured myself another glass of water. Luke lunged for the freezer, grabbed the carton of coffee gelato and dug out a heaping spoonful. I let him feed it to me like I was a little kid, but the instant it hit my lips and tongue, I felt so much better. My shoulders dropped. Relief. “Oh, my God. Thank you so much. I have never eaten anything so hot in my entire life.”
Amy walked into the room. “Everything okay in here?”
I took another bite of gelato. “Yes. Luke saved me.”
“For a minute there, I was worried you just didn't want to talk about the engagement party,” she said, not seeming the least bit concerned about the fact that her sister had just nearly died from Thai food.
Between this and the scene in the bedroom, it felt like she was waiting for me to be a downer about her wedding. But I refused to be that person and I was not going to let her goad me into it, either. I would not rain on her parade. No way, no how. “Are you kidding? I can't wait for the engagement party. I'm really looking forward to meeting Luke's family.”
“My parents are so excited. It's all they talk about. My aunt and uncle are flying in from Omaha. They wouldn't miss this for the world.” He nodded and smiled, continuing to feed me ice cream. I just went with it, watching as the expression on his face never wavered from true enthusiasm. “My brothers and my sister will be there, of course. I have two cousins coming, one from Florida, one lives in New Jersey. Then there's my best man, and the other groomsmen of course, and some old friends from school and some of my neighbors.”
“On our side, it's you and the other bridesmaids,” Amy said.
“Great. Sounds great.” I managed a smile, even though my lips were still throbbing. I was going to have to start psyching myself up for this. A room full of strangers who were about to become family? This was going to mean questions. Likely lots of questions. About our parents, our childhood—precisely the reason I avoided those situations.
“We tried to keep it small. Just like the wedding.”
It made me wonder what the size of the final guest list would be. This did not sound small. “Don't worry about me. It's a happy time. It'll be fun.” I smiled again. In any normal family, yes, this would be fun. For Amy and me? Complicated. I had to give my sister credit for attempting this at all. “Should we get back to dinner?”
“Do you want me to run down to the Thai place and get you a new order of Panang?” Luke asked.
“You're sweet, but no. I'm not really hungry. I'll have another glass of wine while you finish eating, and let you guys be on your way.”
I kept to drinking while Luke and Amy finished their dinner. We talked about the wedding, about their notion that this wasn't going to be a large affair, just a small intimate gathering at the country club Luke’s family belonged to. Of course, they lived out in Westchester County, so I already knew it was going to be all kinds of swanky. Another step into the unfamiliar, when the familiar had become perfectly comfortable. Maybe that was my problem.
I cleaned up the dishes while Amy and Luke gathered the last of her things. Then it was time to say goodbye. I didn't want to prolong my agony, so I just hugged her. “I’ll talk to you sometime this week,” I said.
“Shut up. You'll text me tomorrow and it'll make my whole day.”
I smiled through the tears, not wanting to let her go. “Deal.”
She stood back and grabbed my shoulders. “You'll always be my sister, Katherine. Moving out won't change that. Nothing can change that.”
“You're right.” I nodded. “Nobody can take that away.”
Chapter Seven
The first guyI went out with after I left Ireland was Dan. Dan, the Doomed. Everything Dan did was measured by the yardstick of Eamon MacWard. It wasn’t his fault that he didn’t look as good in jeans, or couldn’t really pull off five o’clock shadow all day long. There was no blaming him for his perfectly average voice or the fact that he didn’t make my heart flutter when he walked into a room. No, it wasn't fair that Dan had so much to live up to, but sometimes life just isn't fair.
I'd hesitate to call Dan an actual boyfriend, even though we dated for nearly two months. Dan was a stand-in. Our relationship never moved beyond sex, and just like an addict, I wanted it all the time. Dan was always on board, and he tried. Good God, he tried. But what Dan and I had wasn't going anywhere. I was too busy trying to show myself that what Eamon and I had shared was merely physical, and therefore, easily replaced. I'd been epically wrong.
Kissing was the most unfortunate part with Dan. He was greedy and desperate like he was worried he'd never get another kiss in his entire life. There was no finesse. There was certainly no artistry.
Slower. Don't rush.
But I want you. I want you to know how much I want you.
