“I think they’ve gone through every emotion in the book. Fear. Betrayal. Disgust. There were days during the trial when I knew my wife didn’t even want to look at me.”
“But she sat in that courtroom every day, didn’t she?”
“She did. She didn’t miss a minute of any of it. She got up every morning and did her hair and got dressed and acted the part of loving wife. She smiled at me from the front row. And then she sat there and listened to the evidence against me and the stories of people whose lives I’d ruined. And of course, she had to face our family and friends and deal with that fallout. I was insulated from it because I was sitting in jail.”
Alec could hardly fathom living through any of this, but just trying to put himself in Barry Millner’s shoes, or those of his wife, left him with a lot to think about. “And what about your kids?”
And that was when it happened—a tear rolled down Barry Millner’s craggy old face and his lower lip started to quiver. Alec hoped like hell the camera was capturing this. “There’s nothing in the world that’s worse than disappointing your children. They’re all grown now. In their thirties and forties. Kids of their own. But I look in their faces and still see the little ones running around our backyard. And I know that I failed at the one thing I couldn’t afford to fail at.” He sniffled and wiped at his nose. “It doesn’t matter how long I live, I don’t think I’ll ever get over the heartache of that. And of course, I’ve missed out on so much. My grandchildren’s birthdays. Holidays. Family gatherings.”
Alec paused a few moments for dramatic effect, but he was also thinking about the parallels between Barry and himself—dreams and hopes, disappointing those you love, and living with regrets. They’d taken dramatically different paths in life, but no one got through it unscathed. “If you could go back in time and talk to your younger self, what would you say?”
“Don’t throw away your chance at happiness just so you can have money or success. If you think there’s even the smallest fraction of a chance that you can find something that will feed your soul or give you a happy heart, pick that instead.”
Whoa.Alec hadn’t quite counted on Barry’s answer hitting quite so close to home. He rose to shake Barry’s hand. He didn’t admire the man. Not at all. But he did respect the fact that he’d been so honest about the lessons he’d learned. And as Alec watched him shuffle away, he knew one thing—the man might be exactly where he belonged, but this was not a happy ending.
“Great job, Alec,” Robin said. “I think we got everything we needed. You’re really a natural.”
“Thanks,” he said, taking in her words and letting them tumble around in his head. “Actually, you know, I’m not really a natural. It’s all practice. It’s being onGood Day USAfive days a week for years and years.”It’s doing hundreds and hundreds of interviews about things like twenty exciting new uses for chicken or how to take off the pounds in the new year.
“Whatever works. I’m happy we’ve got you on the team.”
Robin got distracted by her phone and walked away, leaving Alec to wonder about that last part. On the team? What exactly did that mean?
He packed up his things and then tried to help the crew with the same, but they seemed like they were happier doing it themselves. Their way. So Alec walked out to the parking lot to wait, which was unfortunately a depressing exercise. Minimum security or not, they were at a prison after all.
His phone lit up with a text. From Brooklyn.How did it go?He smiled harder than he had in a long time.
Can you talk?Mere seconds later, his phone was ringing. “Hey. Before I tell you about my day, I want to know about yours. How was your appointment at the clinic?” He wanted to be as supportive as humanly possible. And even though he’d had a big life event, nothing matched the importance of her visit to see the doctor.
“The clinic was amazing. Everyone there was wonderful, I am in love with the doctor.”
Alec was surprised how much his heart sang after hearing that things had gone well for her. She deserved a break. “That’s so amazing, Brook. I’m really, really happy for you.”
“Thank you. That’s sweet. Even if it’s a little weird talking to the guy who doesn’t want to be a dad about my visit to the fertility clinic.”
Alec couldn’t stop thinking about what Barry Millner had said about his kids and feeding your soul. “Then think of me as the guy who you can tell anything. The guy who’s still figuring everything out. The guy who cares about you. A lot.” It felt like he’d crammed his heart into a little ball and tried to stuff it through the telephone, but those words were the truth and it was important that Brooklyn hear them.
“Aww. I like that guy. The guy who cares about me.”
“Good. I like him, too.”
“And how did that guy do with his big interview today?”
“We just finished up. It went incredibly well. I made Barry Millner cry.”
Brooklyn gasped. “Seriously? Alec. Your interview might end up being the highest rated segment in the history of theSunday News Hour. People hate Barry Millner. And they love seeing bad guys cry.”
“I hope that’s true. It definitely felt good to pry that kind of emotion out of him.”
“Was he a creep? He seems like he would be. Either that or evil.”
Alec ran his hand through his hair and looked out over the steely gray institutional building. “This is going to sound really weird, but I mostly felt sorry for him. Or I guess it’s more accurate to say that I’m sorry he was so misguided that he blew up his entire life for money. He’s a walking, talking cautionary tale.”
“I still don’t think I’d want to hang out with him. Invite him to Thanksgiving. Or anything like that.”
“Nope. Me neither.”
“So, when do you get back?”
