AVERY: Hi. So Rawley and I talked a couple days ago and I think it would be best to start working toward our “breakup” after all.
TAYLOR: Ok, you two are in control of this.
TAYLOR: How fast do you want to move on it?
AVERY: It doesn’t have to be fast.
RAWLEY: Whatever Avery decides is okay with me.
AVERY: And it should be amicable. We’re staying friends. Both in fake social media land and real life.
TAYLOR: Great. Maybe we can keep up some likes, even comments on posts, but no public appearances together.
TAYLOR: Next week I will leak an article about how busy you both are with your sports obligations right now. That’ll set up a narrative that staying together just became impossible with your schedules etc.
AVERY: Okay, thank you.
Rawley marks Taylor’s message with thumbs-up.
39
AVERY
TWO DAYS LATER
“You have any questions about the shoot today?” Taylor asks. She’s on speaker while I drive to Rori Reilly’s Orlando tennis facility, where we’re filming the Triumph commercial.
“No, I think I’m good. Thanks, Taylor.”
“Okay, great. Sorry I couldn’t be there.” She works out of New York City, where she’s stuck for a meeting. Rori’s agent is going to help us both on site instead.
At least this will kill a bunch of hours today.
Because over the last seventy-two hours with nothing but one game to force my attention elsewhere—a game he was supposed to be at—I keep returning to one topic in my mind.
Rawley.
It’s not that I think my decision to end things was wrong, necessarily. There’s a reason for the rule I established, and it feels safest to keep the exit strategy as is.
But I alreadymisshim. I miss talking to him. I miss our texts. I miss laughing together.
And especially while I’m here in Orlando, it feels wrong not to spend time with him. Feelsempty.
It wasn’t so bad the first day, but after more have passed, that’s the best way to describe how it feels: empty.
The feeling of a wrong absence and my life out of sync.
It was worse when I woke up this morning, alone. When you count my road trip last week, it’s been ten days alone now. My body and mind are screamingwhere is that man I want to hold,I want to burrow under the covers with.
It’s only been seven weeks since our first kiss, but I guess that was long enough for him to upend my normal.
Come on, Avery. Pull it together. Reset.
Today should be a good chance for that, to focus on my goals as I fulfill my duties at the commercial shoot. After all, the endorsement opportunities were the whole point of this arrangement.
As I get closer to the facility, I try to run through my lines from the script in my head, to push my thoughts in a new direction.
The commercial has kind of a cute setup, while showcasing our skills. Rori’s going to “teach” me how to serve, and I’m going to do the same with dribbling. Only the script has the other person being terrible at what we’re being taught, which should be entertaining if a little embarrassing.
