“What we’re doing here is that I would like to understand more about your training, so I’m going to ask for more details about the specific skills you were taught and how they all fit together. Let’s start with your training as an erotic companion. There are clearly a lot of different skills listed in your operations manual, but were there any particular skills that you focused on more than others?” The list in front of me was comprehensive, which was not surprising. I’d seen this list before, with a few variations. Not all erotic companions were trained in heavy bondage, for example, though all of them were trained in light bondage. There were a variety of things that could be included or excluded, depending on the dimari in question and the requirements of their master, such as watersports or breath play.
I wasn’t surprised when Jai flinched at the question. I knew that talking about this was going to make him uncomfortable, and I was going to have to keep a close eye on his physical reactions, to make sure I didn’t stress him too much.
“I was primarily trained to serve groups,” Jai said, his tone flat, his face expressionless. I checked the list in front of me, and sure enough, catering to groups was at the top of the page. Kade had mentioned that when we’d been discussing adopting Jai, but at the time, I’d believed he’d meant it was one skill out of a variety of them, not the primary focus of Jai’s training. Even so,catering to groups wasn’t unusual, where an erotic companion was concerned.
“Oral sex was also a secondary focus,” Jai went on. “Aside from that, it was a fairly even spread between many of the other skills.”
That provided a little context, but no serious reason for the level of trauma he was feeling. I was well aware of the Eumadians’ training techniques, and their primary motivation in any training session was to get the dimari to enjoy the tasks they were learning. That wasn’t due to any sense of sentimentality. They simply knew that the slaves performed better if they enjoyed their work. I needed more information.
“If I was to offer you the choice right now to pick any sexual activity to engage in, which one would you choose?”
Jai thought about that. He opened his mouth several times, but closed it again before proclaiming his answer. Then finally, he said, “I could perform a strip tease for you.” There was no particular enthusiasm in his voice. At the same time, he remained seated, instead of jumping up to do exactly that. I currently had no intention of actually asking him to do it, but I was curious as to how he’d respond.
The simple fact that he’d chosen an activity – any activity, regardless of what it was – was interesting. Most dimari would have defaulted to a general appeal to please their master – ‘I’m available to perform any activity you would like’, or something to that effect. So was this a result of there being particular tasks that Jai was trying to avoid? Maybe I should test that out.
“What if there was one activity that you could choose that would be permanently removed from the list, something I would never ask you to do. If that was the case, which one would you choose?”
He looked revolted for a moment, and I expected him to name one of the more rare and niche skills – watersports, forexample. That was certainly one I’d want to avoid myself. Or maybe heavy bondage? For someone with past trauma, being tied up could be terrifying. “Oral sex,” Jai said roughly.
“Come again?” I was genuinely surprised by that one.Oral sex? That didn’t seem nearly intense enough for Jai to be running scared from it.
I glanced at Kade, firstly wondering what he was making of this, and secondly hoping he might be able to offer some kind of insight into why Jai would find that so objectionable. But it seemed that Kade either didn’t understand what I was silently trying to ask him, or he didn’t have any answers.
“Why do you object to oral sex so much?” I asked Jai.
He was avoiding my gaze now. “It’s painful, sir,” he said, his voice little more than a mumble. He was fidgeting restlessly, his toes gripping the carpet, his fingers twisting together in his lap.
What?Painful?
Then suddenly, Kade decided to provide the insight I needed. “I think perhaps, sir,” he said diffidently, “your definition of what oral sex means may be different from what it means to Jai. I have plenty of experience with your version of oral sex.” That was true, though it made me blush a little to have him say it so blatantly in front of Jai. I’d been naked with Jai exactly once, and that had gone poorly. “But my own training with it was not always so gentle. I imagine that an erotic companion would have been taught even more advanced techniques than I was.”
This was what Bryce had been talking about earlier; getting into Jai’s head and really understanding the way he saw the world. “Okay, Jai, could you please describe to me exactly what your interpretation of oral sex is.”
“I was expected to practice on dildos,” he said, and I’d been expecting that. I knew for a fact that no dimari ever had sex with another person until they met their master for the first time. They were expected to practice all manner of techniques usingsex toys of various kinds; dildos, vibrators, mannequins. But they were all sold as virgins, even if the designation was only a technicality.
“My trainers wanted me to be skilled at taking even very large dildos into my throat. I found that…” He stopped, and I suspected I knew why. Dimari were taught not to disparage their trainers, and even more so, not to complain about the skills their masters had bought them for. And as a result of that, I was going to have to be just a little bit ruthless here, if I was going to properly understand the situation.
“Give me your honest opinion on your oral sex training,” I ordered Jai.
He shuddered and seemed to fold in on himself. “I found the sensation of being choked to be… terrifying,” he finished, whispering the last word. “And my throat always ached afterwards. I was required to practice for hours.”
My gut rolled, and I felt a trickle of nausea. But if I was disgusted by listening to this, I had to remind myself that Jai had had to live it. “My understanding of the training process is that dimari are generously rewarded for performing well. What rewards were you given for a successful training session?”
“I was allowed to climax,” Jai said, in a deadpan voice.
“And did you enjoy that?” I asked.
“Erotic companions are trained to be able to harden on command. And to climax on command,” Jai said… but that was apparently the full extent of his explanation. I knew from nearly two years of listening to Kade just what that reply meant. Saying no to one’s master was heavily frowned upon. So a well trained dimari would do everything in their power to obfuscate their opinion, to hide behind pleasantries without ever flatly denying something, if the honest answer was, in fact, no. Being allowed – or rather,expected– to climax, after performing a task that wasnot the least bit arousing, would only have made the pressure of the training worse.
Before I could think of my next question, Kade made a small sound of disquiet, and I wondered whether he was going to advise me to take a break, or perhaps to switch to a different topic for a while. “Did you have something to say?” I prompted him.
“I’m wondering if perhaps… Oral sex might not be the only thing we’re misunderstanding here. A typical erotic companion is trained to cater to groups of people. But what do we mean by ‘group’? For most dimari, that would mean four or five people. But I’m wondering what sort of group Jai was trained to serve.”
Jai didn’t respond, so I asked, “Jai? How many people would you have been expected to serve in one session?”
“Up to fifty,” he said, his voice barely audible.
Fifty? “Mother-fucking assholes,” I muttered under my breath. “Okay, so you’re also a combat specialist, so where and how were you anticipating serving all these people?”
