“Because she got recognized. The word isn’t out about her being single yet, but I touched her arm, and she worried people would make assumptions.”
“And you haven’t talked to her since?”
“No.”
“River, fucking call her. This is ridiculous.”
“She said she’d call me. I’m trying to be respectful.”
“Don’t be respectful. Just call her.”
“Cal, it’s not that simple.”
“And why not?”
“I called her ‘babe.’”
“What?”
“The day she was here, I called her ‘babe’. It just slipped out, but I fucking loved it, Cal. It felt like I was supposed to be calling her that all along. I touched her – well, not really, just on her arm – and I wanted to hold her hand and kiss her. God, I wanted to kiss her so much. She was so cute, making candy back herewith me, and it was like all I wanted to do was make candy with her forever.”
“And probably have sex with her, too.”
“Well, yeah, but it’s more than that. I felt it when we met, too, Cal. It felt like she could be the one, and I thought it was crazy because I had Lace, and she had Cameron Levine. They were, supposedly, the world’s most perfect couple, but then we spent time together, and it started to feel more and more like Lacey and Cameron were supposed to be together, and I was supposed to be making candy with Kennedy in my tiny shop before we go upstairs to my terrible apartment and fall asleep next to each other. It felt like I wanted to hearhercomplain about there being no AC, not Lacey. I wanted Kennedy to, I don’t know, do something like threaten to stay in a hotel or make me drive up to LA because she’s not about to deal with no air-conditioning in the summer.” River laughed at just the thought of that. “That sounds stupid, but that’s how it feels for me,” she added.
“So, you can’t call her because of that?”
“No, Ican, but I’m not going to. I’m not going to beg her to give me a chance. I’m not going to call her when she said she would callme. Not this time, anyway. If she’s serious about being friends, the ball is in her court. And before you say anything, it’s not a pride thing. I called her before. I needherto do it this time so that I know.”
“Know that she’s serious?”
“Yes. It feels like she needs to be the one to make the next move, even if it’s just in friendship.”
“Can you really be friends with her when you’re clearly already starting to fall in love with her?”
“I’m not falling–”
“Oh, come on, River.”
“I don’t want that, Cal.”
“You don’t want to be in love?”
“Not this fast. That’s what happened with Lace.”
“So?”
“So, we missed the whole part about us not being a great couple because we let ourselves fall so fast.”
“You don’tletthat happen, River. It either does or it doesn’t. You fell for each other, and it ended. That happens all the time. It sounds like it happened to Kennedy and Cameron, too. They fell in love. Then, they fell out of love. Now, you’re falling for Kennedy, and she might be falling for you.”
“I just want a date. That’s where I want to start.”
“So, I’ll repeat my question but alter it a little so I don’t freak you out again. Can you be friends with Kennedy if you want to date her?”
“I was trying to be, and I ended up calling her ‘babe’, so I don’t know anymore.”
“Then, you’re right: you shouldn’t call her. You need to know what you can give this relationship first. If she’s only thinking friendship and that would make you miserable, you can’t offer her that, River. You and Lacey started making each other miserable because you didn’t want to hurt the other person, and so you ended up hurting yourselves because of that. You can’t do that to yourself again.”
