“I’m kind of in a similar situation with River,” she admitted. “We haven’t been together for five-plus years or anything; it’s only been a year and a half, but that’s part of what is bothering me about it. We shouldn’t be anywhere close to that yet. We should still be tearing each other’s clothes off, excited to see each other. Right? I know people move in together at different times, but I thought we were on track for that, and it’s clear that we’re not.”
“Who doesn’t want to?”
“She doesn’t. Well, she told me she wasn’t ready when I asked her on our anniversary, and I didn’t want to pressure her, but things have pretty much sucked since then. It would have been fine if she really just wasn’t ready, but it didn’t feel like that was the whole truth. And, God, we haven’t had sex in the longest time.” She covered her face with her hands. “I try, you know. I planned a date night. That was when we saw your movie. She bailed right after it and didn’t have dinner with me.”
“She didn’t have dinner with you on a date night?”
“No. And I wore my good underwear, too.” The blush instantly crept up her cheeks. “Yeah… Disregard that. All of your underwear is probably the good underwear, but I–”
Cameron laughed and said, “I also have bad underwear, just like everyone else.”
Lacey shook her head and smiled.
“Anyway, nothing happened, and nothing keeps happening. We have our own businesses, and that keeps us busy, but notthatbusy that we can’t see each other more than once or twice a week, and it’s been like that recently. I don’t know what to do.”
“You asked me about talking to someone. Is that an option for you?”
“It’s only been a year and a half. We’re not supposed to need counseling yet. We’re supposed to be texting constantly,annoying people around us, FaceTiming each other on the nights we have to be apart, and having as few of those as possible to begin with because we can’t stand not falling asleep next to each other. Instead, she’s picking up her phone and checking in on the store this morning, when I put my hand on her stomach.”
“You…” Cameron faded out before turning back to the water. “Wanted sex this morning?” she finally finished the sentence what felt like a whole year later.
“Honestly?” Lacey shook her head again. “No.”
Cameron turned her head back to her and asked, “So, why?”
“I just felt like I should try, and if we did, we did, and maybe that could’ve gotten us back on track. We took a shower together mainly for the same reason.”
“I actually get that.”
“You get what?”
“The shower thing. I’ve asked Ken to shower with me, too. We used to do it all the time, and it was rarely about the actual shower then. Now, it’s just… gone.”
Lacey swallowed hard, and it was her who turned back to the water this time as she tried not to picture Cameron and Kennedy Gannon having shower sex in her very vivid imagination.
“So, you didn’t…” Cameron added.
“We only had the shower part of the shower.”
“What are you going to do?” Cameron asked.
“Same as you, I guess – I have no idea. So, I’m going to keep hoping an answer comes to me.”
“And if it doesn’t?”
“I will have tomakeone come to me eventually, right? The happiest I’ve been in months was riding on this thing.” She lifted her board momentarily before she dropped it back down to the wet sand. “I like my work. It’s not that. It’s the personal stuff Ican’t seem to figure out. Like, I love my girlfriend. Why can’t it just be good with us?”
“Cameron!”
Cameron turned her head toward the house, and Lacey did the same. Jessie was hurrying down the sand in a huff.
“Busted,” Cameron said to Lacey.
“Are you about to get middle-named again?” she joked, and Cameron chuckled.
“Did you tell the camera guys that you could refuse if you wereuncomfortable?”
“Actually, that was me,” Lacey confessed with a raised hand. “I didn’t want to be on camera in my bathing suit. I’m self-conscious. Sorry.”
