“I’m okay. I cried a bunch that first night and a little the next day. I haven’t been sleeping well, but that’s primarily because you get used to your end-of-the-day routine. We did the same things pretty much every night, and she’s not there beside me anymore, so that’s weird, too.”
“Yeah,” Lacey replied. “You miss her?”
She set her cup back down and said, “Not like that, if that’s what you’re asking. I miss the woman who’s been my best friend for five years. It’s strange, not having her there, because she’s always been there. Like, if I go to make coffee, now I don’t needto make her one. That made me cry a little. But I don’t miss the romantic part of our relationship in the way you might be thinking. I’ll always cherish those memories, and I’ll be grateful for them. I have no regrets; even the stupid fight that got us at least temporarily banned from work. I don’t regret it because it was the thing that got us to finally admit what was supposed to happen, and…” Cameron swallowed. “Well, also, because it got me here.”
“Here?”
“Sitting here with you, pretending we are drinking this coffee because it’s something to do, when, really, we need to talk to each other about what happens now.”
“Ah,” Lacey replied.
“I’m not going to pressure you for anything, Lacey. I want you to know that. We had an amazing weekend together, and I’d be lying if I said that’s all this was for me because it’s not. I don’t think it’s meant to be that way, either. I had more fun with you than I’ve had in years, but I also know that you are with someone, and as long as you’re with River, I’m only going to ask you if we can be friends. I realize that can make things awkward because you know I like you and would be interested in more than that, so if you tell me that we can’t be friends, I’ll definitely understand. I’ll back off. I don’t want to, but I will.”
“Cameron, you just got out of a very long relationship. How can you be so sure that you want anything else now? I don’t do casual dating. I never have. I’m not a one-night stand kind of woman or someone who wants something short-term. I’m looking for love. I want a partner, a real relationship.”
“I want that, too.”
“But you just ended–”
“Kennedy and I both knew this was coming. We held on so long because we didn’t want to lose each other, Lace. We were both afraid that if we broke up, we’d lose someone we love, andwe weren’t ready to go there, but when we did, it was probably one of the best conversations we’ve ever had, and we both said we understood.”
“Understood what?”
“I know she likes River. She knows I like you. We understand, and if we’re ready to move on, we want the other person to do that.”
“And you’re ready to move on a few days later?”
“I’m ready to try, Lacey. But I wouldn’t be saying that if there were no you. It’s not like I’m ready to go to some club and meet random women. It’s you or… Well, it’s you.”
“Or no one?” Lacey asked.
“For now, yeah. I want to fall in love again, Lace. I’d like to get married one day. I know I come with a lot of baggage, and not just because my long-term relationship has recently ended but because what I do for a living comes with a lot ofadjustingfor someone who isn’t in the industry.”
“Kennedy didn’t have to adjust.”
“No, she didn’t. But Kennedy’s not the woman I’m sitting across from, asking–” Cameron stopped, realizing something. “Wait. Fuck. We can’t talk about this. You have a girlfriend. I’m sorry. I got away from–”
“I don’t,” Lacey interrupted. “Anymore.”
“What?” Cameron asked, leaning a little over the table. “You don’t?”
“I should’ve messaged you that when we confirmed this coffee thing, but I don’t know… I felt weird doing that right after River left my apartment. I needed a little time to think.”
“Lace, you’re single?”
“Yes.”
“I’m single,” Cameron said, pointing at her chest.
Lacey chuckled, and Cameron took a deep breath. Then, she saw someone approaching her from the side and looked up.
“Are you Cameron Levine?” the woman asked.
“I am, yes. But I’m–”
“Would you mind taking a selfie with me? I’m a huge fan.”
“I’m having coffee with my–”
