“How to do it right, I guess. Not hurt them. I’ve never…”
Something shifts in his expression, the sad look I’ve grown to expect when I say certain things. When sex in particular is brought up. I know he’s thinking about Jason. About what he knows, or thinks he knows, and why this is something I’m even worried about in the first place.
If I wasn’t embarrassed before—
“Hey,” he says, putting a too-gentle hand on my shoulder. “It’s good that you’re thinking about that. More people should.”
“So, do you have any advice?” I ask again, trying to push past this moment.
He nods. “Okay. First thing. You take your time getting her warmed up. And once you get down to business, don’t be selfish. Make sure she—”
“Nate—”
“Comes first—”
“I don’t need words,oh my god.”
“You asked.”
“I asked foradvice,not— Can you not use that word? There are certain things youdo notwant to hear your brother say.”
Ugh. I suppress a shiver.
He grins like this is the funniest thing in the world, and I think I’ve officially given him a new way to screw with me.Great. “Just remember to take your time. Pay attention to her needs.”
I nod. “Okay. Anything else?”
“You gotta make sure you set the mood.”
The front door swings open before I can ask what he means by that, and Iris looks back and forth between us. “What’s going on?”
“Nothing—”
“Alex has a girlfriend.”
I turn to my blabbermouth brother with a scowl. “Nate!”
“What? It’s Iris.”
“Really?” She sits down on the armrest on the other side of Nate, her eyes going bright with excitement. “Tell me everything.”
“He needed some advice on how to make sure their first time goes well. I was just about to tell him about setting the mood.” I bury my face in my hands with a groan, but he continues on. “I’m serious. This shit matters. Get some candles. Rose petals, maybe. Make a playlist.”
“Rose petals?” I ask, already picturing Mike’s reaction to that.
“It’s romantic.”
“Why didn’t you do any of that stuff for me?” Iris chimes in, and I look up with a scowl.
“I would have, but you were begging me to fu—”
“Can you guys please stop before I die?”
“We’re just saying, effort matters. Trust me, she’ll appreciate it,” she adds, smiling like she didn’t traumatize me.
“I appreciate the advice,” I say, standing up to make my escape. “Both of you. Really. I’m going to my room now. For the rest of my life.”
My room is quiet and thankfully, free of my brother and his wife. I sit on the edge of the bed, wondering how I could scrub my brain of everything I heard in there while I pick up my phone.
