“Now.” I frame his face with my hands, my breath coming in short, frantic pants. “Now, Aiden, please.”
He tumbles me back onto the bed, covering my body with his. My hands roam over his back, up his arms, around his neck. His shaft is resting against me and I lift my hips up, wanting him inside me, needing him to fill the ache throbbing between my thighs.
“Seraphina, wait.”
Doubt floods in, takes control. Did I do something wrong? Has he changed his mind?
“Protection,” he grates out.
I blink as my lips part. “Oh. I… I got caught up—”
“Are you on a pill?”
When I nod, he shifts. He presses against my entrance and I instinctively part my legs, arching my hips up to take him inside.
“I’m clean.” His voice is like rough gravel. “I haven’t been with anyone since last fall.” He looks at me, the cords of his neck standing out as he fights for control. “Are you okay with this?”
My eyes burn. I reach up, one hand on his cheek, and kiss him as I lay one hand on his hip and pull him toward me. He groans against my lips as he sinks his full length inside me. My body clamps down on him as I cry out. I can feel everything, every stroke, every pulse of his heart against my chest as we move together. Pressure builds, deeper and more intense than before. I climb higher as our hands and mouths roam, touching, kissing.
I explode. My body shudders as pleasure spirals through me. I’m holding on to Aiden for dear life, my arms around his neck, my face pressed against his throat. A few moments later he groans out my name as he reaches his release.
Slowly, very slowly, I drift back down to earth. Aiden starts to move off me, but I wrap my arms around his shoulders.
“Just a moment longer,” I murmur as my eyes drift shut.
“I’m squishing you.” His voice is amused, warm.
“It’s a good squish.”
He chuckles and drops a kiss on my cheek. When he tenses, I open my eyes and look up at him. His brows are drawn together in a frown as he gazes down at me.
“Are you all right?”
I can see the shutter drop over his eyes, feel his walls come back up even as he gives me a small smile.
“Of course.”
He brushes a kiss across my lips, but it’s brief, cold. I lie there as he gets up and walks out onto the terrace, confident in his body. I ease myself up and pull one of the mussed sheets up over my breasts as he pours us each another glass of champagne.
He’s distancing himself already. Even as he comes back into the room, I know the old Aiden is back. He hands me the champagne and I force myself to drink slow.
He told me. Warned me. The sex was incredible. So why am I feeling so low?
“Are you okay?”
He’s watching me closely. If he catches even a glimpse of internal struggle, he’ll cut off our affair before it even begins. While I’m fairly sure I’m not going to leave this arrangement with my heart completely intact, I don’t want to give this up. I’ve never experienced this kind of pleasure or intimacy before. Even though I’m struggling right now, I also know this will help me. Help me accept I’m still desirable, still capable of experiencing pleasure. That I can have a real relationship.
“I am.” I slip my own mask on, smoothing out my face as I give him a small smile. “A little worn out.”
His eyes narrow slightly, but he doesn’t push. He finishes his champagne before he pulls on his pants and shoves his arms into the sleeves of his shirt. I sit there, numbness creeping in as I keep my gaze focused on the sea.
He stops by my bedside, leans down and brushes his lips across my forehead. Another quick gesture meant to pacify, not arouse.
“Good night, Seraphina.”
“Good night, Aiden.”
He hesitates, as if he wants to say something more. And then he walks out, closing the door with a quiet click behind him.
