My hands tighten on my staff. I don’t know what to do, what to say. I can’t imagine another reason for why he’s here. But a part of me is still afraid, so afraid it’s not what I think, that I’m dreaming and I’ll wake up any second.
“Is there somewhere we could talk?”
I nod, not trusting myself to speak. I turn and walk down the hall, every single cell in my body attuned to his presence behind me. His scent wraps around me, makes me want to stop and throw myself into his arms.
I lead the way out of the glass hall to a nearby stairwell. We climb up, exiting out onto the rooftop garden Jessica reserved for a post-performance reception. Cocktail tables are draped in ivory cloth and scattered amongst the statues. Votives flicker in the dimming light. Sculpted evergreens and tall grasses sway gently in the summer breeze as the sun sets, painting the sky with strokes of violet, rose, orange.
I move to one of the tables, my body trembling. When I finally look back at Aiden, his eyes fix on me once again with an intensity that sucks the air from my lungs.
“I missed you.”
My throat closes. “I missed you, too.” I shake my head. “A part of me will always miss you, Aiden.”
“See, it’s not that easy for me.” He takes a step toward me. Just one, but my pulse stutters. “It’s not just a part of me. It’s all of me.”
He continues his advance. The emotion in his eyes draw me in, hypnotize me with their intensity. Desire, yes, but longing, too, and something I want so desperately to be real I’m afraid I’m imagining it.
He stops in front of me, just a few inches away.
“The hardest part,” he murmurs as his hand comes up again and he captures a strand of hair between his fingers, “was realizing I’ve been in love with you for years.”
The hope I’d been battling takes over, fills me until I feel like I’m walking on air as I gaze up at the man I love.
“Years?” I finally choke out.
“Years.” His other hand comes up and he cups my jaw, runs his thumb along my cheek. “Please tell me I didn’t realize it too late.”
I smile up at him as the tears I’ve been fighting off and on all night finally win and stream down my cheeks.
“It’s never too late—”
He cuts me off with a soul-searing kiss. His lips slant across mine, his kiss demanding and possessive. I respond to his need, throw my arms around his neck as I press myself against him. One arm clamps down around my waist, pulls me even closer against his body. I don’t know where I end and he begins.
He lifts his head and slides his fingers into my hair, presses my face against his throat.
“God, Seraphina, I almost lost you.”
“I’m here,” I murmur against his skin. “I’m right here, Aiden.”
He pulls back, trails his fingers from my temple to my jaw. “I don’t deserve you.”
“Aiden—”
“I mean it, Seraphina. You gave me everything and I took it without giving anything in return.”
“Stop.” His eyes widen in surprise, and I place a finger over his lips. “I will tell you this over and over until you finally believe it. You are so much more than you believe yourself to be. And you saw me, truly saw me.” I graze my fingers over the faint stubble on his jaw, then up to his dark hair. Smile faintly as his eyes close and he leans into my touch. “It frightened me, how easily you could read me, how you paid attention to the little things even as you claimed you weren’t good at relationships.”
“I never wanted one. Not,” he adds as he gently brushes his nose against mine, “until you.”
“I’ve had a crush on you for years.” I laugh when he arches a brow. “I told myself it was just a harmless crush. That’s why I always called you Mr. Hawke. It was a reminder to myself you were off-limits.”
His shuddering breath fills the space between us.
“The night you left, I told myself I made the right choice.” He scoffs. “I was lying to myself. My past shaped me into a cold, calculating shadow of the man I once thought I would be. It was so much easier to choose distance over getting emotionally involved and potentially losing someone else I care about.”
“I understand. I do,” I insist as he lifts his head to look at me. “It’s understandable, Aiden. You’ve been through hell. I held myself back, too, remember?”
His mouth softens into a genuine smile. “Yes, but then you saw me, all of me, and still looked at me the way you did. Do you have any idea,” he murmurs as he brushes a finger over my lower lip, “how terrifying it is to realize someone sees all of your flaws and still wants to be with you? To wonder if one day they’ll wake up and realize it’s too much, or that you’re going to eventually let them down, too, and that maybe they would just be better off without you?”
