Page 98 of For Better or For Worse

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Not to mention, lunging just seems unnecessarily violent. I might have to stab her, but I’m already starting to feel sick. I don’t think it’ll be very wise of me to do more than the bare minimum on my first time. Maybe after today, I can stab her again if I have to.

A maniacal giggle erupts from my throat, pushing past the deep breath I just tried to fill my lungs with. Oh gods, I don’t know if I can do this. I have never stabbed someone before. I’ve never even been mean. A good brownie is never mean. And I’ve been a good brownie all my life. I have no idea how to be mean. Even when I tried to kill Richard, I tried to do it nicely. With cake. And sex.

My stomach churns.

But I fight down the urge to run away and simply avoid this situation altogether. Because I might not be able to go back in time and be there for Fabia after she got hurt. But I can be here for Nicholas. Even if the two of them don’t end up together, he won’t ever suffer alone again.

Because he has me.

Straightening my shoulders, I walk very nicely over to Nicholas’ ex. Jace moves beside me, but Fabia stays with the prince.

“Hi, I’m Queen Arienna,” I say as soon as I reach her. “What’s your name?” It’s only polite to know the name of the person you’re about to stab, and I need to be polite right now. I don’t think I’ll be able to make it through something so horrid if I can’t balance it out with more niceness. When someone hurts someone, they apologise and try to make the person feel better afterwards. Then everything is okay. So… like, logically… if I just do that in reverse, it will still count, right?

The lady preens as she stands. Her shoulders straighten. Her chin lifts, and her eyes dart left and right as she smiles smugly at those around her. “I’m Warress Stephanie Goav Orliaina Du Staabmai, Your Majesty,” she says with a low bow as she flips her hands in the Razian greeting.

“Aw, that’s a lovely name,” I say, focusing on the ‘do stab me’ part. With a name like that, maybe it wouldn’t be rude of me to gut her like a bat? After all, Richard really likes using his dick,and at our wedding, he said I’ll get to peg him, so he clearly likes getting dick too, so… names must have meaning...

Feeling slightly better about this, I pick up the knife lying near her plate.

I turn towards her, but then I panic and lose my nerve. Grabbing her fork so I don’t look suspicious, I start cutting up her steak with a soft giggle. “Fun fact,” I babble, trying to calm my nerves. “Centipedes don’t ever have a hundred legs. They have an odd number of segments and two legs per segment. So they might have forty-nine or fifty-one segments but never fifty. How cool is that? And if you’re thinking, oh woman, that’s a lot of feet and I could get a really good foot job out of them, you should be very careful. Because it turns out –” I’ve cut her entire steak into bite-size pieces, and now I’ve nothing to fidget with.

I stare at her plate for half a second before I start cutting them even smaller. My hands are oddly calm despite how terribly my soul is shaking.

Oh gods, I really don’t want to stab her.I’d rather ask her to leave. And give her a picnic hamper or something to take with her.

She might’ve hurt Nicholas, but what if it was a mistake? What if she’s just another Hyatt or Gionova or some other monster that just needs love and a safe place to let her guard down and some food so she isn’t so grumpy? I mean, it’s not like my king hasn’t done terrible things… So how do I know?

How do I know if I’m doing the right thing?

What if I’m not supposed to stab her?

She’s seated at this end of the table. That means she’s one of King Richard’s biggest supporters, right? So maybe she’s changed? Maybe he’s forgiven her or maybe he has already stabbed her? And since Jace isn’t allowed to stab her, maybe I shouldn’t either?

But –

She kink-shamed Nicholas. In public. As Richard wasn’t here for that, he couldn’t have punished her for it, which means she’s still owed at least one stabbing.

“Because it turns out,” I say, giggling as I force myself to stop hacking at her diced steak, “the fangs they use to inject venom into their prey are actually just more feet! So they can give you a foot job and a blow job at the same time, as well as a death job, making them perfect for people into necrophilia and feet! Isn’t nature awesome?”

“Yes,” she says with a large smile, her eyes dancing with delight. “Thatisawesome, Your Majesty. Ni–”

Spinning quickly, I stab her in the stomach. With luck, she’s so happy over hearing that fun fact that she doesn’t even notice. I look into her eyes with a hopeful smile.

But the mirth that was there a moment ago has faded into horror and pain and anger.

My eyes widening, I freeze as panic slams into me. For a moment, the entire world freezes alongside us. Not a single sound is made. Not a single person moves. Then –

She screams.

I laugh loud and hard. Yanking the knife out, I try to apologise, but all that comes out is higher-pitched laughter.

Oh wait!my brain screams as I remember Fabia’s lesson on First-Aid.I wasn’t supposed to take that out! I’m making it worse!

I jab the knife back into Stephanie’s stomach, hoping my bestie didn’t notice. But the woman jerks away from me, and I end up missing the original hole.Oh buggernation!I move with her, trying to grab her with my free hand to hold her still. She bumps into the lord behind her, and he jumps back to give us space. The whole room suddenly moves, more bodies flowing away from us. Only Jace hovers nearby but he doesn’t intervene.

Acutely aware that Fabia can see everything much better now, I rush to put the blade back where it was. But she’s bloody moving like a caught fish, and I miss yet again. I jerk the knife sideways in my desperation. Maybe if I connect the three holes, Fabia won’t notice I did anything wrong. But the blade catches on a lower rib.

Stephanie screams again as she tumbles to the ground. I’m holding onto the knife so tightly that I fall with her. She lands on her back. I slam on top of her, and the blade goes in all the way to the hilt. I can feel it dig into the floor as she writhes beneath me and the sensation of it all makes me shudder.