No saving her.
I knelt, not to check. Ava already had, I knew that much. I knelt because my knees gave out. Because I couldn’t keep standing.
Goddammit.
God. Damn. It.
Remi’s voice rang in my head.You ever been a woman at night, Chief... knowing what actually waits in those alleyways... What it means when a girl runs alone and doesn’t come back... That’s my every day. My work. My history. My fucking reality.
Had I been so lost in my own grief since coming home that I missed all of this? Had my silence allowed it? Had my department? My blind spots?
She trusted us. And we failed her.
The sound of sirens reached my ears just as the whisper of my conversation with Ava echoed again in my head.
“Now. Are you sending someone to check on Sofia or not?”
I hesitated, still feeling like I had no clue what was going on. “On what grounds?”
She stared me down, no fear, just... disappointment... expected disappointment... “On what grounds? Are you kidding me right now? She was supposed to be at the clinic and didn’t show. Her ex showed up instead, with a weapon. She hasn’t answered her phone. Her aunt hasn’t either. And you want a list of legal justifications?”
We failed this woman, Sofia Cross.
Now, she was another name I’d carry. Another weight I’d never put down.
I stood slowly; one hand braced against the wall. I took one last look at the girl we didn’t save. A voice we didn't hear.
And when I walked back toward the kitchen, Ava didn’t say a word.
She didn’t need to.
She already had said it all and I didn't listen.
CHAPTER 7
AVA - THE FIRE INSIDE ME
I hated hospitals; the lights were too bright.
Not the kind that hurts your eyes. The kind that made blood look more vivid, skin appear more pale, and pain seem more real.
I sat on the curb just outside the ambulance bay, my cardigan long gone, my hands still stained red. The medic had tried to clean them. I let her. But blood doesn’t come off that easily, not when it’s soaked in memory.
Ms. Cross was inside. Stable. Barely. I needed a minute after we arrived, I needed to calm the firestorm brewing within me before I could walk into that hospital and do what I needed to do... before I faced Sofia's aunt and told her we had failed.
I hadn’t cried.
Not when I called it in. Not when I found Sofia. Not when I looked into the vacant, dead eyes of a woman who trusted me.
The only thing keeping me grounded was the slow, steady weight of another hand curled around mine.
Remi.
She’d been waiting outside when I stumbled out of the house. The second she saw me, she didn’t ask anything. Just pulled me into a hug that cracked my heart wide open. I didn’t hug back, not really, but I didn’t let go, either.
And now she sat beside me on the curb, silent, watching me with that same mix of fear and fury I saw in the mirror every day.
The sirens had faded. Officers swarmed the scene. And yet somehow, none of it felt real.
