Her words come out more defensive than I was expecting, and I can’t stop myself from doubling down. “Are you sure? I just want you to be comfortable.”
“Yeah, I would literally crush you!”
My heart sinks at the implication, and I desperately wish she would look at me. Her desire to avoid eye contact is obvious as she wipes her palms on her shorts and looks anywhere else.
“Fuck, El. You don’t really think that, do you?” I say in disbelief. Refusing to truly acknowledge me, she nods as she swirls the almost melted ice around in her cup.
While I want to respect Ellie’s feelings, I can’t let this go. The need to make her stop feeling this way about her body overrules my concerns of overstepping. I lean forward and whisper in her ear. I don’t mean for it to come out as low and throaty as it does, but I can’t stop now. “Baby, if I was worried about you crushing me, I wouldn’t have asked. There’s nothing more I want than for you to be comfortable, but I won’t be hurt if you say no. My lap is yours if you want it.”
The look on her face is indecipherable, but when she stands up from her seat, I realize that she is actually going to do it. From his booth, Wes raises an eyebrow at me as she makes her way around the table and sits right on my lap. He gives me a thumbs up, and I am glad that Ellie is not looking in his direction. She tugs the bottoms of her shorts down from riding up her thighs and moves a bit in my lap to get comfortable, and it’s hard not to react to the tension building between us.
The magnetic attraction is so strong when she leans into me, wrapping her arm around my neck. She smells so deliciouslike honeysuckle and oranges, and I am becoming obsessed with her. The kiss at the happy hour is a fleeting memory that I don’t want to lose. I already know how she tastes, and what her lips feel like on mine. But, I want it again.
“Is this okay?” I whisper as I wrap my arm around her waist for stability. I keep my touch light, and despite how much I want to kiss her, I don’t want to overstep her boundaries, especially when she’s under the influence. Just because she is willingly sitting on my lap doesn’t mean that she is willing to do anything else.
Ellie laughs at something I said, and she looks so beautiful. A piece of hair falls onto her face, and before she has a chance to react, I push it back behind her ear. My fingers graze her cheek, but I don’t pull them away. I feel that same tension and heat from before, and all I can think about is grabbing a handful of her luscious, thick waves and pulling her into me. I need to feel my mouth on hers. I need to feel the urgency of her touch.
No. What I need is to stop thinking about Ellie like that.
Everything we have is fake, and it would do me good to remember that. I wish my body had gotten that memo.Grateful that Ellie cannot read my mind, I realize that if she sits up any further on my lap, she will definitely feel my desire towards her.
As if she is trying to drive me mad, she leans into my touch, her cheek resting on my palm, and makes eye contact while placing a small kiss on my wrist. I have never seen her this bold,but I know it’s the alcohol talking when she asks sweetly, “What are you thinking about?”
I pull my hand away and lean my head back trying to gain my composure, and I let out a low sigh, “God, Ellie. You don’t want to know. You have no idea what you’re doing to me, do you?”
“I might have some idea.” She is flustered and flirty as she reaches to take another sip of her drink, which is just as empty as it has been for the last half hour.
We don’t stay this close for long before I see her eyes start to flutter. She is exhausted and drunk, and it’s definitely time to get her home. I tighten my grip around her waist slightly to get her attention, and she jolts up, fully awake—or at least pretending to be.
“El, do you need to close out your tab?”
She nods and starts to get up. I move to walk her over to the bar, but she wants to go up to pay without me. When she chats with Nick, their eyes move between each other and me, but I can’t hear what they are saying until Nick calls me over.
“Are you sure you want me to get you an Uber? Why doesn’t Patrick drive you home?” He looks at me like he’s plotting something, but I have done more than enough assuming tonight.
“Sure,” I say with a smile. “I don’t mind.”
“But you’re drunk! You shouldn’t drive either!” Ellie accuses me, but Nick comes to my defense immediately.
“Ellie, I’ve been serving him all night, and he barely drank three beers. He’s fine. His friend on the other hand—” Nick sideeyes the booths where Wes is loudly boasting about something to his potential conquest.
I leave them for a minute to see if Wes still needs a ride, but he shoes me away before I can get a word out.
Wes is a big boy, and he is more than capable of taking care of himself. Not to mention, I drove him here, so there’s no car for him to try to drive anyways.
As I park my car in front of her apartment building, we sit in silence for thirty seconds. She weaved her fingers between mine at some point during the drive, and I didn’t stop her. The weight of her palm feels so right intertwined with mine. When she goes for the door handle, she doesn’t quite let go, and I pull her back towards me.
I’m not trying to be selfish, but I want more time with her—and I’m worried about her making it up to her apartment safely. Earlier in the night, she complained about carrying groceries up three flights of stairs, and having her stumble her way up to her apartment doesn’t feel very safe.
Ellie’s eyelids start to droop as her gaze drops from mine. I squeeze her hand softly, getting her attention.
“Would it be okay if I walked you up to your door? I just want to make sure you get inside safely.”
Her uncoordinated nod shows how tired she is, drifting in and out from the car ride, but when she steps out of the car, the cool air wakes her up enough to keep her eyes open. She straightens up when I hold my hand to her lower back to guideher up the stairs. The keys get jumbled up in her hands, but she manages to get the door unlocked on the third try.
“Goodnight, Ellie.”
I’ve already started to walk away when she grabs my hand. “Please don’t go yet. I don’t want to be alone, and Nick doesn’t get back for a couple hours. Please stay?”
