The next phone call I make is to Jake. He answers on the first ring.
“Hey, she’s gone,” I say, crying into the phone. “Can you come over?”
“I’ll be right there.”
Just like before, within minutes, I hear the sirens as they get louder. When they pull into the driveway, I open the door and they rush in. I’m confused because I don’t know why they are rushing; she’s already gone. I guess they have protocols they must do just in case.
After checking her vitals, they come to the same conclusion we did. She’s gone. For a brief moment, we had hope that perhaps we were wrong, but no.
They ask Dad and me to step out of the room while they prepare her to leave. It takes them almost an hour before they call us back in. By that time, Jake has arrived, and we all go back into the family room. They have her in a body bag, but it’s open. All the bedding has been removed from her bed, and she is on a stretcher.
“Mr. McKenzie, I’m sorry, but we have to wait for the coroner to arrive. Because your wife passed at home, the coroner has to be present before we can remove the body.”
Dad nods. “I understand.”
“It shouldn’t be more than a few minutes.”
I sit on the couch. Jake sits next to me and holds my hand. Dad sits on my other side. And we wait.
Finally, about an hour later, the coroner arrives. Once he confirms she has passed, he leaves with the paramedics and my mom.
Even though we all are exhausted, none of us are tired. We spend the rest of the early morning hours just sitting there. At about six in the morning, Jake heads home. Dad waits until about nine and calls the funeral home. He and Mom planned her funeral weeks ago, so all he had to do was let Mr. Martin know she had passed and where they could pick her up. They will take care of everything else. Visitation is on Friday, and the burial is on Saturday.
***
Mom’s service was beautiful. It was everything she would have wanted. I doubt the ache in my heart will ever go away. I miss her so much.
Dad is doing as well as can be expected. He has immersed himself in work, and frankly, I can’t complain. He needs to keep busy, and if work is the answer, I am all for it. I’ve even asked my boss for some extra hours. Being in the house alone is scary, and there have been so many times when I swear I have heard her voice.
Jake, as always, is there for me. He has become my rock and my strength, and frankly, I can’t image going through any of this without him.
Chapter 4
Summer 1983
Jayden
This has been the worst summer. On top of the obvious, I have found myself in a rut. My future was all mapped out. Graduate from high school, go to Columbia, which I got accepted to, and become an amazing writer. But I don’t see it happening. If I continue with my plans to go to Columbia, then I leave my dad alone. Columbia is a six-hour drive from home, and I wouldn’t be able to get home as much as I would like. With Mom having just passed, I don’t feel I can do that. It’s too soon.
So where does that leave me? I can go to the local community college and continue to work. It will keep me at home with Dad, and I will still be able to help him with bills. There is no money for any type of college from Dad, and the community college is a lot cheaper than Columbia. If I continue to work, I can pay for my classes.
I explain all this to Jake one afternoon while we are hanging out. Dad is at work, so it’s just us.
“So you’re not going to New York?”
“Jake, I can’t. I can’t leave Dad now. Maybe next year.”
“What are you gonna do?”
“Well, I have been thinking about it, and I really want to be a writer. I don’t need a full college education for that, and I plan on taking some creative writing classes at the community college.”
“Do you really want to know what I think about all this?”
I look down at my hands and say, “I guess, but I have a feeling I’m not gonna like it.”
He laughs. “You probably won’t. But I think you are shortchanging yourself. I believe your dad will be just fine with you off at school, and he has my mom and dad too.”
I shake my head. “No, I’m not leaving him.”
