“You will be sensible enough to help cover for my faults, and I will be wealthy enough to hire any masters you wish to learn from or buy you any book your heart desires. Together, we shall behave exactly the way we wish, and in doing so we shall live happily for the rest of our days.”
Mary reached up to touch his cheek. Then with the tip of her finger, she brushed his lips, reminding them both of the kisses they had shared. “You paint a beautiful picture, John,” she said.
It was the first time she had called him by his name, though he had been asking her to do so for months.
“If you like the picture, then do say yes, so that we can set the process in motion to make it a reality.” Still, she hesitated to speak, though her gaze lingered on his lips. “Mary, I desperately need to kiss you, but I will not betray your trust again. Please, I beg you to put us both out of our misery and agree to marry me, so that I may kiss you.”
It was unfair of him to couch it in those terms, and he knew it, but she did not object. Instead, she smiled and said, “Yes, John. You may kiss me.”
With a small corner of his mind, he recognized that she had not agreed to marriage, only to being kissed, but with her permission to proceed, he could not prevent himself. He took her lips with his as they both expressed how much they had missed each other. It did not take long for him to deepen the kiss, and she eagerly responded in kind.
Eventually, he pulled back, but his hands lingered on her waist. “Mary, I noticed that you have not yet agreed to be my wife. I cannot allow us to do this anymore unless marriage is in our future. Do you not wish to marry me?”
“I do wish to,” she said, “very much, in fact.” He felt a smile growing on his face, but she halted it by raising a handand saying, “But I am uncertain whether I can live up to your expectations. I admit that I occasionally dreamed of marrying Mr. Porter, but you are an earl. I cannot be a countess. I do not have the poise or the social skills necessary for the role. Even worse, I do not even have a desire to learn them.”
“Then we are evenly matched,” he said. “I cannot be an earl. All the things I told you this afternoon of how I was a failure as a man include how much of a failure I am as an earl. The man you knew as Mr. Porter is who I truly am. I prefer gin to brandy. I prefer cheap pubs to elegant gentlemen’s clubs. I prefer stew to roast leg of lamb.
“However, I have learned to play the part when necessary, and after seeing you in London I know very well that you have learned that skill, too. So, we can play our parts in public. Then, at home, we can be free. It is your free, passionate side that I love the most. The way your eyes light up when you learn something new. The way you dance and sing when you think no one is watching. That is the Mary that I desperately need, so that I, too, can be myself.”
Mary studied his face, as she had so often. He still did not know what information she sought there, but as she gazed at him, her expressions softened and the shadow of doubt left her eyes.
“Yes, John. Yes, I will marry you.”
Immediately, John’s hands moved around to her back. He pulled her even closer and kissed her once again. It was not the wild, passionate kiss that had come before. This one spoke of how much he cherished her. At least it started out that way.
Five minutes later, John heard a man clear his throat. He looked around and saw Darcy poking his head out of the drawing room door.
“I do hope that there are wedding bells in your future,” he said. “If not, I am afraid I will have to have strong words with you, Cousin.”
John turned towards Darcy, and he felt Mary do the same, but he kept his arm around her back, keeping her close to his side.
“We are engaged, Mr. Darcy,” said Mary. “Though I thank you for your protectiveness toward me.”
“Then come back into the drawing room and share your news,” said Mr. Darcy. “I am certain Elizabeth and Georgiana will have many congratulations and just as many questions.”
Chapter 21
Four days later, John was shown into Mr. Bennet’s study. “Mr. Porter,” said the older man. “This is a bit of a surprise. I don’t think any of us expected to ever see you again.”
“Ah. Well, I have come to complete some business that I started two years ago but was unable to finish at the time,” said John.
“And what business is that?” asked Mr. Bennet. “As far as I know, your only business was to tramp around your property and play cards.”
Something in the belligerent tone of the man’s words told John that Mr. Bennet might not be as oblivious to Mary’s actions as she had believed.
“I have come to ask for your blessing for me to marry your daughter, Mary,” said John.
The complete lack of surprise on Mr. Bennet’s face confirmed John’s suspicions. He knew of their meetings two years ago. The question, then, was why he had done nothing to stop them.
Mr. Bennet’s eyes narrowed. “And why did this conclusion of your business have to wait for more than two years?”
“Because I was married at the time,” John said.
“You what?!” cried Mr. Bennet, his anger and shock so strong they caused him to stand. Within moments, he hadcontrolled himself enough to sit back down. He said, “What could have possessed you to secretly court a lady, a young, lonely, impressionable lady, when you had no ability to follow through on your unstated intentions?”
“I cannot defend myself other than to say that Mary is absolutely delightful,” said John. “I was already in love with her before I realized I was doing anything wrong. It was only when I realized how very much I would end up hurting her that I managed to tear myself away.”
“Well, you didn’t tear yourself away nearly soon enough,” said Mr. Bennet. “She was a shell of herself for months after you left. She had managed to gain a certain amount of animation and sociability before you came, and your disappearance dashed it all to pieces. Do you know what it does to a father to see his daughter suffer so much and not be able to do a single thing to help?”
