“Leader,” I spoke up, staying in position.
I knew he hadn’t seen me when he first came in. His attention went to the young woman who’d been haunting his dreams, simmering his thoughts, and holding his heart since he’d been placed behind bars.
“Tune?”
Confusion had him coming my way, and I was able to resolve some of mine by him coming closer. A shackled Leader had walked into the damn room, and I was done for.
“I’m married to her sister,” I informed him.
His world was already shook up, so I didn’t need the nigga putting two and two together and coming up with zero. He paused midstride but remained locked on me. When his eyes watered over, he broke contact and dragged his feet to the bed. As he stood on the side of her, he inspected each and every part of Glee, letting his eyes linger on all her bruises and cuts.
“Baby, baby, baby, baby. Fuuuuuuck!” He sputtered his words as his chest heaved. “H… How? What the fuck! How the fuck?”
Had it not been for the machines, there would have been a long, black, brittle silence. Leader’s eyes were wild, and the chains’ vibration let me know his hands were shaking.
“I should have—” He sucked in a wad of air as if he was fighting to breathe. “I should’ve never told you to come see me. I should have fucking never… Baby… Baby, you can’t do this shit. Who the fuck did this shit! Hunh?” Leader yelled as he shot daggers at me.
I didn’t have any answers for him. As badly as I wanted to let him know everything, I didn’t know much of anything. He’d have to get those answers from Don. He’s the one who knew it all.
“This is my fuckin’ heart. You hear me, nigga? Hunh! This is my fuckin’ baby!” Leader took his attention from me and bent down with his face just inches away from Glee’s. “You so fucking pretty, Pretty Mama. You know that? You so fucking pretty, baby. I need you to get up. I… I need you to get up. You gotta finish school. You gotta finish what the fuck you started, baby. Baby, baby, please. I-I won’t make it. If you don’t make it, I won’t fucking make it… Get up, Glee… Keep giving me a reason to dream.”
He placed his forehead on hers, not caring about the tubes and cords. He continued whispering words, and when I heard the word God, I knew he was praying.
Waaaaah… Wa… Wa… Waaaaah
“Shit.” I rubbed my hand down my face.
Instinct had me taking a step toward the carrier, but I paused. I didn’t want to overstep. Leader kept his head on Glee’s, but his eyes traveled across the bed. He hadn’t noticed the carrier sitting in the chair. He hadn’t noticed shit outside of Glee lying in that bed.
He watched the baby for a beat as she began sucking on her hands, soothing herself.
“Whose baby?”
Rubbing my hand down my face again, I grunted. “Uhhh… Shit, yours.”
“Nigga, what?”
Leader stretched to his full height, brows crinkling as he looked at me like he wanted to knock me the fuck out. I fucked with Leader, but I’d hate to have to box his ass out while he was chained up.
“Look, I’m new to this shit too. Me and her sister got married on some business shit. Apparently, Glee came home from school and went into labor the day I got married. Her sister didn’t know, her mama didn’t know… Shit, I don’t even think Glee knew. But I do know that’s your jit.”
Leader kept his eyes on me like he expected a second head to sprout from my neck. Then he took a step, tripped on the edge of the bed as he rounded it, and caught himself before the chains made him hit the ground. He now stood directly in front of the baby carrier, but was just out of reach. I could see she was still sucking on her fist, but I knew from that night I stayed at the townhouse, she would need some milk soon.
When she opened her eyes, Leader dropped his head. His shoulders began to softly bounce, and I knew he was crying. I looked away to give him some privacy; I knew this shit had to be hard as fuck on him. He was serving a ten-year bid, and the girl he loved and respected was lying in a hospital bed and had just given birth to his daughter. That would be a second child whose life he’d miss for a decade.
“Pretty Mama,” his voice croaked. “What the fuck did I do?”
“Aye, Leader. This ain’t on you, mane. I mean, the baby all you, my G, but?—”
“I… I kept my distance until my people said they couldn’t contact her. So I pushed myself back in her life. I told her to come see me… No, I demanded that shit. She stopped everything. Knowing she’d just had a baby… I… We…Yesterday at visitation. Fuck!”
He shook his head as the silence swallowed us. I didn’t want to say the wrong shit, so I stood quietly as the machine and his daughter made their natural noises.
“I come around, and she just does what I say. She was good—perfect. My baby was untouched… She had a future, Tune… And I… I fucked it up. Fuck!”
Leader lifted his head when she began fussing again. His chains jangled as he reached for the baby, but he was restricted by the way his hands were chained.
“Fuuuuuck! I… I can’t?—”
