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This. Being connected with another person. Being this close. I’d never thought I’d feel this—not ever. I’d thought I was done.
I moved my hands up and cupped her breasts, touching them gently. We were going slower this time, easier. The game from earlier was over.
I moved one hand to her spine and stroked downward, toward the delicious flare of her hips and her ass. “Amateurs, huh?” I said.
Her voice was fuzzy, lost in what she was doing. “What?”
“Amateurs,” I said again, my hand sliding lower, lower. “It’s a shame. But I guess you finally got to ride a man who knows what he’s doing.”
When my finger dipped low, she tensed for a second, then ground back against it, curious. She leaned down so her breath teased my lips. “I like that,” she said. “Do you think you can make me come?”
“I’ll do my best,” I said. “Hold on and we’ll see.”
Chapter 21
Gwen
“I feel different,” I said.
Olivia raised her eyebrows at me. We were in a small Chilean restaurant around the corner from the small art gallery on Market Street where she worked as a graphic designer, creating all of the gallery’s brochures, maps, and guides. “You look the same,” she said. “Except you’re not wearing any makeup, and I’ve never seen you eat so many empanadas before.”
“Holy shit, these are good,” I said, grabbing another one. Score one for me: I didn’t have to worry about lunch bloating my tummy, because I didn’t have any gigs later. Or ever again. It was a little hard to do a convincingly sexy act with a stomach full of deep fried dough. “I do feel different, though,” I insisted. “Did you feel different after you met Devon?”
Her eyes widened, and then she shrugged. “Well, you know I had a crush on him for months before I met him.”
“True.” Devon had lived across the way from Olivia’s Shady Oaks apartment, and she used to watch him from her window, totally sick with lust. “But after you met him, though.”
She bit an empanada and chewed thoughtfully. “The short answer is that everything changed when I met Devon. Like, literally everything. Starting with the sex.”
That made me think of me and Max in his bed five days ago. And then me and Max when he’d come over two days ago and we’d done it on my table. And in my bed. And in my shower. And on my floor—twice. Holy shit. “Do you remember the dolls we played with growing up?” I asked Olivia.
“Sure.”
“We had Barbies, but then we had that knockoff doll who was supposed to be a Barbie, but wasn’t.”
“I remember her,” Olivia said. “She kept falling apart.”
“Her legs fell off, and we used to put them back on her backwards,” I said. “She’d have these awkward backward legs on. I’ve had so much sex in the past week that I feel like that doll, you know? Like someone took my legs off and put them back on the wrong way.”
She had to put down her lunch, she was laughing so hard, her hand over her mouth as she bent over the table. “I don’t want to say I know what that feels like, because I don’t want to gross you out,” she said, “but I totally know what that feels like.”
I rolled my eyes. “Honey, I guessed.” I hardly thought a beast like Devon Wilder would be shy in bed. He probably kept my sister plastered to the sheets half the time. “Looks like we’re both getting properly laid now, huh? Though it happened in different ways.”
“How serious are you two?” she asked, taking a drink of her water. “I mean, Max seems like a pretty serious guy.”
“Are you warning me not to break his heart?”
“You’re sort of known for it, Gwen.” She looked at me with a thoughtful, knowing sister’s look. “But I think Max is different.”
“He is.” I put down the empanada I was holding and wiped my fingers on my napkin, dropping my gaze. “I told him about what happened when I was eighteen.”
She was quiet, and I looked up to find all the humor gone from her expression. “Are you serious?”
“Yes.” I took a breath. “I feel like—I feel like what happened has maybe been holding me back all these years.”
Olivia put her glass down. “Oh, Gwen.”
“I know you think I got over it,” I explained. “The pregnancy, the miscarriage, all of that. I know I gave you and Mom that idea. But I didn’t. I really didn’t.”
