“Sure, why not.” I knew if I didn’t let her feed me she’d assume I was wrecked over the break-up, which I was, but I didn’t want to worry her. I’d deal with it, just like I dealt with everything else. Reason. Logic. Determination. Too bad my heart wasn’t as rational as my mind.
She smiled as she pulled a wrapped loaf out of the old-fashioned bread box. “You said something about going away? Business trip?”
I ran my tongue over my teeth, trying to delay the inevitable hissy fit she was bound to throw when she realized she wasn’t going to get the daughter-in-law she wanted or the grandbabies she’d been praying about since I hit thirty.
“Uh, no. I’m going to Costa Rica.” She looked at me over her shoulder. “Haven’t been there in a while. Thought it would be a good time to check in. I probably won’t stay more than a week. Maybe two.”If the solitude doesn’t drive me crazy.
“That’s nice. Is Briar going with you?”
This is it. Time to man up, dumbass.I was still beating myself up for dragging my family into my mess. Especially my mother. She fell a lot harder and faster than I did. And she’d fallen for Briar years ago, deciding she was the one for me.
“Uh no.” I cleared my throat, curling my hands into fists on the tabletop. “We, uh, actually broke up.”
The knife clattered against the quartz countertop before she turned to face me. She was wide-eyed, her mouth hanging open as I steeled myself for the screaming and crying. No one had ever accused my mother of being calm or rational.
“What are you talking about?” She fisted her hands on her hips. “You just got engaged!”
“I know that.” Getting pissed at her wouldn’t make me feel better, so I drew on the fake calm I’d perfected on the battlefield. “But sometimes things don’t work out—”
“You haven’t even tried! One fight and you’re ready to call it quits—”
“Take a breath.” I gave her a pointed look. “It was more than one fight. It was a fundamental difference in our view on relationships… and the future.” I knew I couldn’t tell her everything or she’d question why I’d proposed to Briar at all. “We thought we could make it work. Compromise. Turns out we can’t.”
She sank down in the chair next to me, palming her forehead as she rested her elbow on the table. “But I don’t understand. You obviously love her and I know she feels the same way.”
I didn’t want to ask how she could be so certain, when I wasn’t even sure how Briar felt about me. But she was right about one thing. I was in love with her.
Squeezing her hand, I said, “Love isn’t enough. You have to be compatible—”
“You’re telling me you don’t love spending time with her?” she challenged, slipping her hand from under mine and crossing her arms as she sank back in her chair. “You’re not happy when you’re with her? You don’t laugh more, smile more—”
“Enough.” I shook my head at her dogged determination to prove she knew my own mind better than I did. No wonder I was so tenacious.
“You don’t like having someone to come home to?” she demanded, as though I hadn’t opened my mouth. “Someone to curl up with at the end of a long day? Who can take your mind off business for a while—”
“Are you done?” Because I didn’t think I could take anymore. She was listing all the reasons my life was better with Briar in it and I didn’t need to hear it if I had a hope in hell of getting over her.
“No.” She glared at me. “Have you ever been with anyone who challenges you the way she does? Who you respect more? Who can match wits with you—”
“This isn’t about what I want! She doesn’t want me!”
A sympathetic look crossed her face before she squeezed my forearm. “Oh honey, I’m sorry. She was the one to end it?”
I shrugged. “It was mutual, I guess.” No way would I share the dirty details with her. “You know we’ve always had a… complicated relationship. I guess I was an idiot to think we could make it work.” But I had hoped that. In spite of the fact it had been fake, for the sake of her safety, I’d made the mistake of letting myself believe real feelings would develop. That maybe she could love me enough to finally face her perverse fear of commitment.
“So, that’s it?” She pursed her lips, shaking her head in disgust. “You’ve never been a quitter, Rhett. Yet you’re telling me you’re going to give up on the only woman you’ve ever loved? That doesn’t make any sense.”
When she put it that way, it didn’t make much sense to me either. But I couldn’t make Briar love me. Or fight for me. She had to want this as much as I did or it was hopeless.
ChapterSixteen
Briar
“Why is Rhett in Costa Rica?”
I didn’t even have a chance to say hello before my brother knocked the wind out of me with that question. It had been a week since Rhett had walked out of my house. The longest, most miserable week of my life.
I held my phone away from my ear, staring at the screen as my heartrate kicked up a notch. Knowing that I couldn’t drive across town to see him left me shell-shocked. It’s not like I’d been planning to pay him a visit, but knowing that I couldn’t if I wanted to gutted me.
