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Dirty talk is only limited by your imagination and vocabulary. HOW you say what you say is limited only by your level of emotional restraint when it comes to expressing your pleasure and leading her amidst her own. Letting sexual assertion and your own pleasure (as well as a focus on hers) be the driving force behind your voice, everything you say will have an impact on her because it is in its most arousing form.
Your tonality is very important in conveying sexual assertion to her. Tonality conveys your emotions and you can use this fact to your advantage during sex. The emphasis you place on your tonality is gets her pussy tingling.
Humans tend to use three forms of tonality: permissive, neutral, and authoritative. Permissive is how we ask questions, and tonality tends to take on a higher pitch. Asking a question (without dominance behind it) is asking for permission. Asking a question means the other person has influence in your decision-making and potential actions. Permission is necessary for you to continue beyond the question basically. Rarely use this tone of voice when talking dirty to your woman, it is not perceived as sexually confident.
Ask your questions with a dominant tone of voice, with a tone of you being secure in your knowledge of her enjoyment. For example, “You like that, don’t you?” said with an assertive tone of voice sounds different than “You like that?” The latter has the potential to sound like a man who is afraid of his woman while the former leaves no room for fear. A dominant tone of voice gets perceived by her as a command to respond to you rather than the approval seeking permissive tone. A permissive tone conveys that you recognize her as the power of authority.
If you are leading the sexual dance, you are the power of authority…why are you trying to confuse her by giving up that wonderful responsibility. Strap in and fucking lead! The more you assert yourself and lead, the easier it gets.
Neutral is when our voice lacks an authoritative or permissive tone. It comes in handy when you need to break her “sexual trance.” Stick with the assertive/dominant voice tone for most of your dirty talk because a monotonous voice is boring.
Your dominant tone of voice leads her mind to focus on her sensations and emotions. Her emotions and what she feels via sensations are sexual rocket fuel. Direct her mind to them, over and over.
You only want to use the assertive questioning and confident-commanding-conviction tonalities.
Questions aren’t stated as “questions” they are stated with absolute conviction. You are essentially conveying your dominance in the form of a question. Don’t ASK her questions, TELL her questions. She wants to feel your power. She wants YOU to feel your power.
BASICS APPLICATION
5 Levels of Dirty Talk
If dirty talk were to be stratified and presented on different levels, it would look something like this:
Level 1: Sounds (roars, growls, heavy breathing, moans, grunts, groans, gasps, animal sounds, etc.)
Level 2: Romantic (“It feels good to be this close to you baby”)
Level 3: Sensually Descriptive (“I want to slide deeeeep in-between your moist, throbbing walls.”)
Level 4: Narrated Fantasies (get her to reveal her deepest fantasies and then create a narrative about them)
Level 5: Hardcore Dirty Talk (“Make that dick cum inside that slut pussy”)
It is fun to utilize all five levels during one se
ssion, ending with explosive level five dirty talk.
If you are starting off slow and sensual it makes sense to pace your language accordingly and begin with level one. If you are both heavily aroused already start at level five and work your way down (or stay at level 5), using levels one and two during the aftercare/pillow-talk. Jump between levels two/three to level five for highly arousing contrast.
For casual sex, I stick with levels one, three, and five unless I’m turning it something more. This can be an implicit way of managing her expectations. During relationships I use all levels of dirty talk.
Types of Dirty Talk Language Structures
Inherent in our language are certain structures. Dirty talk is nearly a language of its own and has certain language patterns as well. You can use these patterns to massage a woman’s mind and make her crave release only you can give.
1] Time-Oriented Dirty Talk Pacing
A] Remember What I Did (Past Pacing)
This is a great “re-arouser” when used to remind her of how dirty you two were because her mind will do all the foreplay for you. No foreplay you will ever do can match that of a woman’s own mental foreplay. It can also be a form of teasing, because it isn’t happening now and you left open the possibility of it happening again.
Great to use during foreplay, whispered in her ear in public situations, or when you tease her by randomly press her against a wall while passionately kiss her and then go about your business as if nothing happened (like I’m fond of).
B] What I’m Doing Now (Present Pacing)
It is what you are doing to her, and what she is doing to you. Simply narrating what you are doing as you are doing it in great detail is surprisingly effective for arousing women. Tell her what she is feeling as you are stimulating her (tautology of course, but it actually catalyzes what she is experiencing and increases her responsiveness to your voice and touch).
