“And which part bothers you more?”she asked gently.
The sudden urge to cry surprised the hell out of me.
“Sweetheart, you're too smart to let fear hold you back.Life isn’t about what happens to you.It’s about how you respond to what happens.Right now, you’re letting your parents’ failures drive your life.Take the wheel for yourself.You already have more wisdom than I did at your age to make better choices.”
I let out a long breath, knowing that she and Wrenly were right.That I couldn’t keep living like I was.It was time to let it go.
“How do I move past the fear?”I asked.
“You push, as hard as you can, until you’re doing what you want.Heart racing.Palms sweating.Knees weak.Embrace it all and jump in with both feet.Live your life, Sophia, with love for the present and open arms for the future.”
Her advice stayed with me for the rest of the evening and into the next day as I tried to focus on the notes from my Saturday shopping trip.
Mom left me be, for the most part, quietly coexisting with me.
I retained that peace until my phone buzzed.
K:Have you eaten?Would you like to have lunch together?
“Is that a fear frown?”Mom asked.
I huffed out a breath and looked up at her.“It’s a ‘he’s being too clingy’ frown.”
“Sophia, it’s almost noon, and that’s his first text.He’s not being clingy.That’s remarkable restraint for a shifter and considerate communication for a man.You’re still denying instead of trying.”
“Ugh…” The groan was because she was right.
She smirked and walked away as I worked on opening myself to the possibility of having a real boyfriend for the first time in my life.
Me:I just ate.
K:Do you want to have dinner tonight?
Me:Yes, but I want to be on the menu, and that’s causing conflicted emotions, so I’d like a rain check and a little more time to wrap my head around the idea of having an unofficial boyfriend.
Me:Please.
K:Do you have any idea how badly I want to see you right now?
Me:No.Send me a selfie.
His expression in the picture I received was tormented and desperate, and made me want to see him even more.No, it made me want to try.
Me:I’ve never been a girlfriend before.What if I mess up?What if I’m not as great as you think I am?
K:We can mess up together.
Me:I thought dragons were perfect mates.
K:Well, you did ask me to annoy you once a day, so I doubt you’ll find me perfect in the beginning.
I caught myself grinning.
Me:Don’t you have work or something to do?
K:No.
Me:Well, I’m trying to work.Find something to do.
