‘No,’ Maddy agreed. ‘There isn’t. But there is something wrong with not even asking yourself what “right” is.’
Maddy realised she was panting with the exertion of talking like this. She stopped and bent over, hands on her knees, catching her breath.
For a moment, neither of them spoke. Then Eva asked carefully, ‘Are you saying you don’t want the wedding to go ahead?’
There it was. The question Maddy had been carefully avoiding. Burying it under seating charts, floral arrangements, and menus. The question no one else had asked. The question no oneshouldhave asked, least of all the woman who was putting this wedding together.
Maddy kept looking down at the floor until she could breathe, thinking,It doesn’t matter. It’s too late now. The question came too late.
‘Of course I do.’ Maddy stood straight again, breathing normally, less hot now. ‘That’s not… I’m not—’
She stopped, pressing her lips together.
Eva didn’t jump in. She just watched her, waiting.
‘I’m marrying a good person,’ Maddy said finally. ‘He remembers to buy milk, he doesn’t leave wet towels on the bed, and my mum loves him.’ She let out a small, shaky breath. ‘He’s exactly the sort of person you’re supposed to marry.’
Eva’s expression didn’t change, but something in her eyes did. ‘“Supposed to” is doing a lot of work there,’ she said.
Maddy gave a helpless sort of smile. ‘I know.’ Then, because apparently she had already committed to ruining her own life today, Maddy added, ‘And then there’s you.’
That did it.
‘Maddy,’ Eva said, and Maddy could have sworn she heard a shake in that famously controlled tone.
‘I know,’ Maddy said quickly. ‘I know.’
‘It’s not appropriate,’ Eva corrected, though it sounded like she was reminding herself as much as Maddy.
‘Right. That too.’
‘You’re getting married tomorrow.’
‘I’m aware.’
‘To someone else.’
‘Yes.’
Eva’s gaze held hers. ‘So whatever this is—’
‘—it’s dangerous,’ Maddy finished.
‘Yes.’
Maddy nodded slowly, though the motion felt strange, disconnected from the rest of her. ‘Right.’ She pushed herself upright properly. ‘So,’ she said, too brightly, ‘we ignore it, then?’
Eva hesitated. ‘Yes,’ she said.
Maddy smiled. It felt like something in her face cracking.
‘Great,’ she said.
And because she couldn’t stand there any longer, not with Eva looking at her, Maddy turned and started walking away, out of the building.
‘Maddy,’ Eva called.
Maddy paused, but she didn’t turn around.
