There’s a quiet crack and the pen I’m holding snaps in half, oozing ink over my fingertips. I draw back, trying to keep fromaccidentally dripping on the contract I was signing. “Shit…er…shoot!”
I cast a quick glance at Alice, worried I’m going to offend her by cussing. The poor lady has been helping us so much and has been so patient. I really should get her a nice gift basket or something for putting up with all our shit…and now I broke her pen. A big bouquet or a gift card for a massage over in Springfield is the least we can do after dragging her all over during the break. It’s been stupid cold again, and Al and I haven’t exactly been easy to work with.
Her smile is tight as she reaches into her desk drawer and pulls out a box of tissues and another pen, passing them to me. Her left eye starts twitching again, so I really need to do something to make up for all the trouble we’ve caused her. I wonder what Paul thinks. My gaze moves back to him as I take in a deep breath. Even over the ventilation and deodorizer in the room, his whisky and oak scent is a comfort. He was the first alpha I really knew growing up, and he’s always been my safe spot. Of course, Josh was there, but he wasn’t really an alpha yet.
“Yeah. Yes. Sorry! Wait, what was the question?” My eyes flick around the room, trying to figure out what I might have missed. I know somebody asked me something while I was in a doom spiral. That may not be the technical name, but it’s what they are.
“I asked if you were ok? You started shakin’ like a leaf and breathin’ funny. I wanted to make sure you didn’t pass out or anything. Did you remember to eat breakfast before we came out today?” He doesn’t exactly treat me like the little kid I was when we first met, but sometimes I wonder if he realizes I’m an adult. Then again, he does the same thing to Al, so I think it’s just a personality trait of his to take care of others.
That’s probably why he became a cop…well, and his parents were cops. Despite all the stress from that, he and Josh aregenuinely good people. I wouldn’t have hung out with them if they weren’t, but I know that the whole situation with Pack Carpenter and Xan messed him up. He feels responsible for that guy getting shot. Not that the man didn’t deserve it, from what Kelly told me at work. But it was Steve and Garret’s dad…I don’t know how they aren’t more upset. If anything happened to either of my parents, I’d be heartbroken. Then again, none of my family are complete pieces of shit, so that probably makes a difference.
Paul ruffles my hair and talks over my head. “This happens sometimes, no worries. It’ll just take him a couple minutes to reboot. How about Alistair and I get everything signed, and we can come back to Spence when he gets over the shock?” He folds himself into the chair beside me and slides the paper out from under my shaking hands. Paul is what you’d call rangy. Long limbed and gangly if you don’t know what you’re looking at. The man has speed and stamina in spades, but he just isn’t bulky like a lot of guys I see at work.
Al sits primly in the chair on Paul’s other side. His eyes flicking around the room, not landing on anything for long—Alice, Paul, the paperwork, me, back to Alice. I cringe again at how pushy I was about the nest, but we need to have one, or at least the space for one. Just in case.
Al is technically our pack leader, just because his name goes on all the paperwork first, but the truth is that none of us really have a take-charge kind of attitude. Paul’s the oldest and most naturally dominant, but he’s also super relaxed about most things. Alistair is the least dominant out of all of us, but he has control issues like nobody’s business. He won’t tell me what happened with his previous pack, but I think it has something to do with why he doesn’t want an omega, and why he can be such an obsessive butthead when it comes to having everythingjust so.
I’m youngest and don’t want to be in charge. Despite what everyone thinks, I could survive on my own, but I don’t think I can be responsible for somebody else. I haven’t even had a pet since I moved out of my parents’ house. The apartment charges a stupidly high pet deposit, and with my school and now work schedule, it wouldn’t be fair for me to have to leave some poor pup at home all day by themselves. So I’d probably need to get two of anything, so they could keep each other company, and I know we can’t afford the deposit for that.
Maybe once we get into this new place. I’ll need to clean up the yard, but after that I’ll talk to Paul about it. Maybe he wants to share a cat with me…or a dog. I doubt I could talk him into a hamster, since Mom always freaked when Chewy got out and ran loose. But he always came home. Well, almost always. There was the time that Kay found him in the tub. It was thankfully empty but he couldn’t get his stubby little butt free. I didn’t know hamsters could jump at all, but they can…just not high enough to escape a bathtub.
I miss having a fluffy cuddle buddy…or any kind of cuddle buddy, really. Paul isn’t the snuggling type, and I’m pretty sure Al would try to smother me in my sleep if I ask for any more hugs. They both concede sometimes, but it’s not really the same. Mom’s a hugger—and so are Kay and Claire. I’m pretty sure that my snuggle needs came from her. Dad, Tiffany, and Penny aren’t big on physical affection, so I know I can be overwhelming to them sometimes, too.
Actually, I could use a hug right now. My eyes flick over to Paul, but he’s reading the paperwork intently before he signs anything. At least one of us is smart enough to do that. Honestly, it’s kind of surprising that they took our offer so fast for the house. He barely had time to do any research on it, and while Al has complained for the last three days straight, he’s also been moving his boxes of books into the living room so he can pack upeverything else in his space. Not that there can be much in there—he has so many books, I don’t know how anything else even fit in his little car when he moved. Where does he keep his clothes, anyway? Last I saw, the closet was stuffed with more boxes of books.
Maybe he’s right about needing a library. Even with the nest, this house has plenty of bedrooms that we should be able to put up some shelves for one. I don’t mean the super fancy built-in kind; those are nice, but we can at least order some cheap IKEA type stuff…or ask Sam how much they would be to build. Christmas has already passed…but…maybe for his birthday? Whenever that is, I’ll need to look at my calendar app.
Should I get stuff set up for the nest now, like a big bed and pillows and stuff? That’s something an omega would want to pick out herself, right? Or…not if we don’t get one, though Kelly says she likes Teddy’s nest so maybe some betas like to nest too. It’s never come up with my sisters, but they all like soft and cozy stuff, so keeping some extra fluffy blankets and stuff around wouldn’t be a bad thing. Extra linens are just an adult thing to have on hand, right?
Paul taps me on the shoulder, sliding a stack of papers across the desk to me and holding out the pen. He taps the one on top, and I see where he and Al have already signed it. I do the same, and he flips through several more pages and taps again. More flips, more signatures…soon I don’t even think about what I’m doing. Which is good because I kinda zone out, and I know the guys want to get the keys to the house so we can go look around and make any decisions on painting or anything before we officially move in.
That’s gonna take a few weeks since Al goes back to work on Monday and I’ve been trying to fit in more hours at the gym so I can start adding back to our savings. Thankfully, Paul was ableto take the next couple of weeks off for vacation. But things have been weird at his work, anyway.
We can probably draft Josh and Billy to help move boxes…and maybe Kelly with Sam’s truck. It’s not like I’d let her carry anything, but she has three big mates—and Steve—or she could just drive if I load and unload it. I’m not sure how else we can get our couch moved from the apartment. It’s a few miles’ walk to the new place, and too cold this time of year to carry the stupid thing that far. I don’t want to have to wait till spring. Do we know anybody else with a truck? Does Sal have a truck? I know Pack Asher does, but they’re super busy with their kids right now.
Paul rubs my shoulder before tapping on the papers in front of me. Then he throws an apologetic smile to Alice and I wonder when I stopped automatically signing stuff. Pinching my thigh under the desk to keep my mind from wandering, I scribble through the last several signatures and give our poor realtor my own apologetic smile.
I’ll call Mom when we get home and ask what kind of stuff beta ladies might like in a gift basket. She’s gonna be so excited about us getting a house.
Chapter 22
Nadine has a lot of room in her frunk. But there’s no way we can move the couch in my poor baby. Still, she brought my books with me when I moved—not that I could bring them all, but I needed to escape as quickly as possible. With the bigger house, maybe I can ask Spencer and Paul to be my moral support to see if my old pack threw out all my stuff or…I don’t know…put it in storage?
No, they wouldn’t bother with that.
It probably all ended up in a dumpster somewhere; my clothes, my books…everything that wouldn’t fit in my car was probably as easy for them to discard as I was. I could have asked my family for help, but I was too ashamed of being kicked out to tell them more than the basics and let them know I would be in touch when I got back on my feet. Besides, I didn’t want to risk them causing a scene, and honestly, none of them understandthe concept of subtle. Even Mom, who’s normally the image of a perfectly sweet and demure omega, gets loud and raucous when it comes to my brothers’ various sporting events.
While none of my brothers need to deal with assault charges—and I’m sure they would, considering how protective they still are—Carson especially doesn’t need any scandals right in the middle of football season. Robert isn’t as well known since rugby isn’t as big in the States, but I’m worried that Ben would get the most flack since he has a career doing MMA. Everybody wants to pick a fight with the big bad alpha, just so they can call foul when they get their asses handed to them.
I’m fairly certain my parents wanted me to go to law school so I could get those three out of jail when that sort of thing happens. But it never called to me the way history does. Not that I could ever make a good legal aid for any of my brothers, considering all the noogies and wet willies I suffered growing up. How do you defend someone as being harmless when they used to hold you upside down until you relented to help them with their homework? I love my family dearly, but they can be assholes.
It feels strange to be moving into a house again after all this time. I had been living near the campus for work when Spencer and Paul asked me to join their pack, and we’ve been together for a couple of years now, all crammed into this apartment. Still, they don’t make me feel like a burden. Spencer even gave me his bed—though it’s full sized and fits me well enough, I often wonder how he slept on it without his legs hanging off the end.
Back then, I couldn’t understand how they would accept me so fast. After everything…after Melody and my pack. I wasn’t good enough, wasn’t alpha enough for her. I shouldn’t have been shocked. Jason, Dustin, Pete, and I all met at college, each pursuing an advanced teaching career. It made sense, logically, but after graduation there was no real sense of camaraderie—still, I thought they were my friends. I never would have agreed to form a pack with them, or look for an omega together, if we weren’t at least on amiable terms.
Then we found her…the attraction was there for everyone, or so I thought. But after she had officially joined us, she stopped talking to me…andeveryoneeventually stopped talking to me. I felt like a ghost in my own home until our pack leader, Jason, finally told me I had to leave. ThatIwasn’t working out with the pack dynamics and I was causingouromega distress. But she wasn’t ours; she was never ours.
So, yeah, maybe I’m a little gun-shy about Spencer and Paul finding a mate and dropping my ass like a hot potato. Maybe I’m not alpha enough, just like she said. Fuck knows I don’t look like one, but Paul doesn’t seem interested in dating, and Spencer, he just wants someone to love him so badly. So he can have the nest. It’s not like we have any prospects, anyway. Hopefully, he’ll find a nice beta and then we can get rid of the damned thing. Maybe she’ll turn it into a game room or a library or something we can all enjoy instead of a fluffy sex room.
