I grunt as she grinds down into my lap, her eyes finding mine, dancing with mischief. “He might be. I feel better being around him. And he smells really good. How can you be sure? ’Cause if I could bottle this smell, I’d make a fucking fortune with horny omegas. Wait, no…dammit. I don’t want any other omegas around him. Yeah, I think he might be mine too…Fuck.”
Teddy cackles on the other end. “Welcome to the wonderful world of finding your scent match. Also, HA! See how it feels now? I was the same way with Kelly. I didn’t want anybody else around her except for Sam. Garret still irritates me sometimes, but we’re working on it.” There’s more muffled talking and a rasping sound that could be someone covering the phone before Teddy comes back. “Listen, Shorty, I gotta go get cleaned up. But you need to come visit soon. Sam’s about halfway through getting the spare room set up, and I need to show you the gym. There’s so much I need to tell you. Soon, yeah? Promise you’ll call back soon?”
Sarah rubs her face against my arm, her whole body trembling before she answers. “Yeah. Sure…by this weekend. Ok? I promise. I just…I missed you, and you know you can call me too, right? This phone works both ways.” Her voice is steady, but she has tears in her eyes.
“No, I know…and I’m sorry I haven’t called. I…I wasn’t sure what to say after everything. I really do miss you, Shorty. I…” Hisvoice cuts out for a few seconds. “Just call me back. I want you to visit soon. I could use some city backup here. Garret and Steve have gone native, and the only place to get a decent takeout pizza is almost an hour’s drive away.”
Sarah snorts laughter at that before murmuring a quick goodbye and hanging up. Her eyes close and a tear slips free, catching on the edge of her jaw before it falls and leaves a dark spot on my shirt. Her body quivers as she leans into me.
“Fuck…I’ve been dreading that call for months. I thought he’d hate me. Not that I could even blame him if he did. I was just so mad and frustrated that he took that asshole back after everything…it just…Fuck!” Her body is shaking and my arms tighten around her. It feels strange to me how quickly I’ve gotten attached to her.
I don’t people well. I can talk to anybody, a personality trait I inherited from my mom. The ability to carry on a full conversation with any random person I meet, but mentally I don’t get attached to anyone. We moved around so much growing up. Every time I’d start to make friends, we got uprooted again and took off. My grandparents were retired and couldn’t decide where they wanted to live, so they changed their minds a lot. My dad was worried about his parents, so we followed them. I was in ten different schools before seventh grade. After a while, I just stopped trying to make friends because we always left, and it hurt.
My mom’s still mad at me that I moved away after graduation. She doesn’t understand my need to escape and have something for myself. The pay here is pretty good; room and board are included for a nominal cost, so I’ve been saving up everything extra for my own place. A place where I feel secure, where no one is going to make me leave. Where if I want to paint my bathroom lime green at three in the morning, I can and nobody can sayshit about it. Not that I plan to do that, but I want the option, dammit.
My music career also wasn’t going to go anywhere while I stayed at home. Music was the only constant I had growing up. No matter what, it was always there. Why not try to make a living with it? Well, because Southern Arkansas isn’t exactly a music industry hub. I could either pack everything up and move to Nashville, which would keep me relatively close to my parents, or take off for parts unknown. So here we are in Los Angeles, and I’m still not doing anything with it. Which fucking sucks.
My skin suddenly feels too tight thinking about all that shit. I’m twitchy and on edge. The unfamiliar surroundings and scents suddenly too much as my mind scrambles to pull itself out of a nosedive. Sometimes everything gets overwhelming, and while I love being around the action and other people, there has to be a break to recharge my internal batteries. I haven’t had any time by myself for hours. I always have to be “on” when I’m around others, and I can feel my mask starting to slip and fracture.
Getting myself out of the downward spiral is easier if I focus on my surroundings: Five things I can see—a small spotted bunny currently glaring at me, an ugly as sin beige couch, a pair of drumsticks lying on the end table, a stack of Monty Python Blu-Rays, and a…is that a bra hanging off the top of the mini fridge? Ok.
Four things I can touch: the fluffy green rug I’m sitting on, the hardwood floor it covers, the small woman curled in my lap, and…what the heck, my phone—because if I try to get up to reach anything else, it’ll disturb her cuddles.
Three things I can hear. I close my eyes for this one so I can listen. A strange teeth-clicking sound from the rabbit, someone talking loudly out in the hallway…and a quiet purr muffled against my chest. Oh…I wasn’t expecting that. My eyes open tofind Sarah staring up at me. Her brows draw low as she meets my eyes. “Sorry, you got really tense, and I didn’t know what else to do. I’m not sure if that was right. I just…”
Her voice trails off as my hands come up and cup her face, holding her gaze. “No, it’s fi—” I stop myself. It was more than fine. “It was nice. Nobody’s ever done that for me before. It just surprised me, but it was good.” My palms slide away from her cheeks, tightening around her shoulders and holding her close. Just feeling her small body against mine. I could try to carry on the countdown with two things I can smell, but the sweet and tangy strawberry shortcake pheromones coming from the woman in my arms are everything right now, and the one thing I want to taste is her.
As if reading my mind, she slowly rises up on her knees, bracing against my thighs. Her hands cup my jaw, pulling me close and pressing a soft kiss against the corner of my mouth. It opens in surprise and she presses closer, licking along my bottom lip before nipping lightly with her sharp little teeth. Fighting back a wince at the pain, I wrap my arms around her shoulders and pull her body against me. Her legs rise up, winding around my waist so she can leverage her body higher, rubbing over my stomach.
Hands tangle in my hair, her mouth insistent on mine, demanding entry as her whole body undulates against me. The sweet and tangy scent of strawberries and cream fills the room.
I am in so much trouble for this.
Worth it!
At least it would be if she wanted me and I wasn’t just a substitute for an alpha who isn’t here. But nobody wants me for long; everybody leaves at some point. That’s why I don’t make friends. Nobody sticks around, or…life gets in the way. I don’t want to just be a warm body this time, using each other to get off before going our separate ways.
Well…Shit!
Chapter 8
What is it about this big beta that makes me want to just roll around all over him? Maybe Teddy’s right and I actually did get two scent matches. I feel better when I’m with him. Well, ok, super horny now, but not sick like I was when I woke up. And unlike the alpha from the mixer, he actually wants to have a conversation, not just talk about himself. Even if I couldn’t care last night, it sucks ass in the light of day. Who the hell wants to be in that kind of one-sided relationship? He just smelled so damn good.
Fuck being an omega, with the stupid scent match bullshit.
Nope.
My arms tighten, pulling against his neck, holding him closer as I try to kiss him again, but his whole body stiffens and pulls away from my hold. It feels like my chest is cracking open. Doesn’t he want me?
Goddamned fucking omega bullshit.
I don’t get upset over guys.
What the actual fuck, brain?
I stare hard into his eyes, but he just looks sad now. Clearly, I missed…something.
“I’m not against a hookup, Sarah. Truly. I mean, sometimes you just need that release. But that’s not you. I want to...I do…Fuck, I want you so fucking much. Something about you just…I don’t know. But I’m not an alpha. I’m not whoever you scent matched with last night. I don’t—” Greg unwinds his arms from me and I’m suddenly too cold; my whole body starts shivering from the loss of his heat. He runs his hands over his hair, pushing the dark brown bangs backward and grabbing the base of his ponytail when he reaches it.
