Elizabeth was happy to see they did not rush headlong into an engagement or marriage. She thought the result about 75% inevitable, but they both required healing and learning. They had all the time in the world, but if they started out on the wrong foot, it might take years to correct. Better to make adjustments early, when it was easier; and better to reduce the penalty for the still possible failure.
Elizabeth said, “Jane, I am entirely satisfied with the outcome, but you know perfectly well you did not need me at all.”
Jane laughed. “I fear you must have mixed up your box with someone else’s. You picked up some false modesty, and I for one do not care for it.”
“Well—”
“I am not like you, Lizzy, but I am also not a mathematical simpleton either. Shall I give you my analysis?”
Elizabeth shrugged; Jane laughed lightly.
“You are 2 for 2. 100%success rate. 0% failure rate. 4 courtships per annum since entering the trade. 20% complete in your task of marrying off the Bennet sisters. #1 most successful matchmaker in Meryton. ∞ times better than our mother. 9 months from completing your task at the current pace. 10/10[xv] average over two samples in Lizzy’s Affection Scale. Favourite sister for 2/4 Bennet sisters… oh, dear, I need to simplify to 1/2. Shall I continue?”
By then, Elizabeth was laughing hilariously. “Do not forget first spinster.”
The two chuckled longer, and Jane finally asked, “By the way, whatisthe answer? What came first, the chicken or the egg?”
“Why, the answer is obvious. It was clearly the egg.”
“So, you are wiser than Aristotle and all the ancients?”
“As a matter of fact, I am… though I must confess, my wisdom is limited to listening to a 5-year-old’s answer and adopting it as my own.”
“How so?”
“Emily Goulding’s father makes a study of fossils and talked of them often with her, at some length. I listened to part of the discussion, and it was fascinating.”
“And?”
“Her grandmother asked her the age-old question, and Emily said, and I quote, since it was so perfect, ‘The egg, of course.’ When asked to explain her reasoning, she said, ‘There were all sorts of creatures like fish, ants, and insects long before there were chickens—and they laid eggs.’”
Jane gasped, and Elizabeth continued wistfully.
“Like many conundrums, the question is aframing error. Nobody ever says it must be achicken egg. It is aninvalidating assumption.”
“So?”
“So, it made no real difference what I did. You and Mr Jameson knew what you wanted but did not know how to get it—or more likely, just did not see how to get past your fear. Asking me to help was a trick you both used to do what you knew in your heart you wanted to do but were too… chicken to ask.”
Both laughed heartily.
“It almost did not matter what I said. Had I chastised you both for half an hour in Spanish, or made the two of you learn chess or choose a puppy together, it would have had the same effect.”
Jane smiled.“Protest all you want, Miss 2 for 2.”
Parsonage
“Lizzy,yourMr Darcy has arrived at Rosings with his cousin, Colonel Fitzwilliam. They will call in a quarter of an hour,” William Collins said with an almost straight face.
Elizabeth laughed gaily. “William, for the rest of my life I will rue the day Mary and I decided to teach you to tease. He is most assuredlynotmy Mr Darcy—unless, of course, you mean something more likemynemesis, or possibly the bane ofmyexistence,myhandsomeness evaluator, or perhaps the source ofmyfrustrations. If he calls today, it is from basic politeness, curiosity, or because Lady Catherine has driven him mad with boredom already—a not unnatural surmise.”
“That would explain it,” Mary said, “for we all know thatMr Darcy is all politeness!”
Elizabeth sighed. “I always wondered whether you heard that. Sir William was truly more insufferable than usual that night.”
“You missed the best part. Before you arrived, Sir William spoke of the refinement of dancing or some such nonsense. Mr Darcy said, if I quote him rightly, ‘Certainly, sir; and it has the advantage also of being in vogue amongst the less polished societies of the world. Every savage can dance.’”
Elizabeth smiled. “That sounds like something he would say. It is difficult to tell sometimes whether he is being condescending or just has a subtle and sarcastic sense of humour like our father. I suppose he must have been quite annoyed when, but a minute or two later, Sir William presented him with Meryton’s principal savage and tried to force him into the detested activity. I am amazed he kept his response to his usual scowl. I think I would have had words with Sir William.”
