“Meaning?”
“Meaning, my understanding of the proportionality of the offence and the reaction does not add up. The equations are notbalanced. From this, I must conclude that I do not possess all the information you have.”
“No sir! You do not.”
He sounded even more contrite. “Tell me how to restore what I may of your equilibrium. It sounds like I am due a kick or two, so feel free. It will be no less than I deserve. If a scolding is more to your liking, I will listen. If you prefer, I will walk away and never mention it again. I am at your service and your direction. Just tell me how to proceed.”
Somewhat calmed by his obvious contrition, Elizabeth asked, “Am I witnessing the fruits of the younger son’s training?”
“When the heir is an insufferable, vindictive lout, grovelling is a skill best mastered early and practised often. Then there is the highly educational experience of being shot at. Basic infantry principles dictate that when you blunder into hostile fire, at the very least duck, then do your best to either dig in or take yourself elsewhere.”
Elizabeth allowed some humour to seep through, her ferocious frown fading. “I hope that occasionally the idea of shooting back occurs.”
The colonel chuckled.
“I apologise for my bad humour. You caught me unawares,” she said contritely.
“How so?”
“Look around! Spring has arrived! The gardens are beautiful. The sun is shining. I was lulled into complacency, and was not entirely prepared for you to tell me that eithermy sister,my family, or perhaps evenmyselfwere consideredso unsuitablethat it was necessary for Mr Bingley to dance the opening and supper sets with my eldest sister; at a ball that appeared to neutral observers in her honour; after assiduously courting herfor weeks; then to leave the county without a word, never to return, a mere 6 hours later.”
The colonel stared in stupefaction. “He did what?”
He collected himself. “I would ask you to repeat that, but I fear it would be even worse on a second hearing. That is in every way horrible.”
“It is! Still inclined to boast of it?”
He at least mustered the grace to look chagrined. “Does Darcy know that he left without a word?”
“He left the same day, within hours, so I assume so. He danced a set with me, then I never saw him again until you called at the parsonage.”
The colonel let out a heavy, frustrated breath. “It is not my place, but I should like to have strong words with both of those clodpoles, and your idea of a boot to the shin has merit. This is unconscionable, and they should be called to account for such ungentlemanlike behaviour—not that I can boast of anything better.”
The colonel's strong words and supposed self-condemnation seemed a crutch to avoid truly unpleasant feelings, so Elizabeth dug in.
“And yet, you were perfectlywilling to boastabout it to a virtual stranger before you knew any of the particulars. Do you assume thatany womanabandoned deserves her fate? I hope that is not the attitude you are instilling in your cousin. If so, the poor girl does not stand a chance.”
The colonel was more confused than contrite or angry.
“No, madam. You make a good point. Do you suppose I could introduce you to her? She could use your good sense. God knows she gets little enough from us.”
“Are you mad?” Elizabeth nearly shouted, then continued more calmly. “You most certainly may not! I doubt I will ever see you or your cousin again, and I can see no need to introduce Miss Darcy to suchunsuitablecompany.”
A little tired of the abuse, the colonel said stridently, “You make my case!If Georgiana has nothing better than my cousin’s common sense and mine to guide her, she is doomed. You would be an exceptional influence on her.”
Elizabeth’s anger ebbed. “It makes little difference, sir. Our circles do not overlap, nor do they need to. Wish Miss Darcy well on my behalf, but it shall not be me she receives guidance from. If she needs wisdom, bring her to Rosings, and she can partake of sensible conversation with my sister. She is as clever as I am, and learning to deal with Lady Catherine will do your charge no harm if she intends to enter society.”
The colonel nodded, looking defeated. “May I at least take my cousin to task over this debacle?”
“You certainly may not!My aim is to havelessdamaging gossip,not more.That would be putting out a fire with lamp oil.”
“It shall be as you say, but Iwouldlike to knock some sense into him.”
“Feel free, but not on my behalf, anddo not daremention my sister. She has endured enough at their hands.”
They reached the parsonage, and with a headache threatening, Elizabeth curtseyed and did her best to send the colonel on his way with at least basic civility. With any luck, she would never meet him again.
Mary and William were out on parsonage business. They had errands that did not strictly require them both, but it was hard to separate them. Things were exactly as they should be for a loving couple married but a few months.
