“I…have been.” I let out a deep breath. Before I can think, the truth flows out of me. “The past few days, there’s a guy, he just got here, but I canfeelhim, I cansensehim. It’s consuming me. I’ve gone to the forest?—”
Orian holds out a hand, frantically waving it side to side. “Wait, wait, wait—are youstalking him?” The cackle he lets out causes him to toss his head backward. He grips the dresser with one hand, the other flying to his face and covering his eyes as his laugh grows stronger. Behind him, his tail whips against the wood, thumping loudly.
“Can you knock it off, asshole?” I shout, curling my fists and standing on the mattress.
When he pulls his hand from his eyes, he smirks more as he sees me standing—pajamas and all—on the mattress. “You look as tough as always, dear sister. Those geometric-patterned pajamas really screamfear me.”
I glance down, letting my fists loosen at my sides. He may have a point. In this moment, I am definitely not threatening at all. But he’s wrong about my pajama pattern.
“First of all, it’scrystalpatterned, not geometric.” I point with intent at various parts of the pattern on my pants. “Second of all, can we please focus? I’m having a major crisis, and I didn’t call you here to make fun of me.”
He raises his hands defensively in front of his chest. “Okay,fine. I’ll catch up on the sibling teasing later.”
“How do I control something stronger than any feelings I’ve experienced before?” The question sounds dumb coming out of my mouth, and evendumbersince it’s directed at my brother.
We’ve been in competition our entire lives—all shadow demons are—so why would he help me be, well, better?
He pushes off the dresser and moves to sit on the edge of the bed, patting the duvet. Hesitantly, I sit down, crossing my legs, my tail curling around me.
His eyes scan my face, and his lips thin for a moment before he lets out a sigh. “I wish I had an answer for you, Orie, I really do. I don’t, though. What I can offer you is my support and ideas. I’ll stay here for a while with you until this either all blows over or you get control over it.”
I blink at him, looking for signs of insincerity…but I don’t see any. Arguably, he looks the most serious he ever has.
“Really?” My voice is quieter than ever, and I feel strange.
My eyes…hurt? But there’s no pain. My vision blurs. Have I been put under some sort of spell? Has Orian done something to me?
Through the blur, I see him nod. “Of course, you’re my sister. Or, have you forgotten that since we integrated with the human world?”
There’s a tightness in my chest as his words loop in my head. I haven’t forgotten that he was my brother—mytwin, no less—but I didn’t think that mattered. It never mattered before.
We’ve always been at odds. We’ve always fought, always tried to best each other, and even tried to sabotage each other occasionally. Now, he’s implying thatI’veforgotten that we are family?
“I didn’t realize our blood connection mattered so much to you,” I scoff, narrowing my eyes at him, which also doubles as trying to fight off this blurry vision.
He shakes his head. “The strain on our relationship wasn’tjuston me, Orie, so don’t sit there and act like it was. We are grown now. We’ve taken a new path for shadow demons, so why don’twetake a new path and actually be siblings for once?”
I touch my face, my fingertips hesitantly reaching my eyes and coming back wet. Bringing my knuckle over my eye, the same sensation smears along the backside.
Am I crying?
This is a strange sensation. Yet another thing I can’t control. My life feels like it’s spiraling out of control. The peace I’ve surrounded myself with is slipping away.
All because of my own mind.
“Let me meet this guy before we decide anything.” Orian’s voice breaks me from the invasive thoughts. “If he gives me bad vibes, we—or I—will deal with him.”
I wipe away the tears, bringing back my clear vision. “What if he doesn’t give you bad vibes?”
He gives me a small smile. “Then we figure outwhyyou're feeling the things you’re feeling, and how you can manage them.”
Even though I called him for help, I wasn’t expecting such…understandingfrom him. He’s different from before. The years have changed him, or maybe he really has become grounded in his humanity.
Maybe I was never better than him, like I thought—though I won’t be admitting that.
All I know right now is how grateful I am. That much I can tell him.
“I am truly grateful you’re here, brother,” I choke out, the words feeling like a foreign language.
