Bard needs to know I’ve succeeded.
I stare at the crystal, its surface catching the faint moonlight shining through the small bathroom window.
After everything I said today, I wonder what Noël and Theron think was a lie and what was not.
50
MAMINKA, SYSTRITSY, AND BRATYA
“Women are the earth’s oldest prayer. Soft as moss, fierce as fire. They carry seasons in their blood, stars in their bones, and rivers in their breath. To be a woman is to be the first miracle the world ever knew.”
—Eyleen Ársa
Noël
Isit on Theron’s belly as he sleeps beneath me. Usually, he wakes before I do, but the past two days have worn him out. The room is quiet, the hushed sounds of the forest outside barely breaking the silence in our home. It’s still dark, though the sun will likely rise in an hour or two.
For the past two weeks, I’ve relied on the sun, moon, stars, and weather to tell the time. At first, it felt strange not having a clock in every building, something I hadn’t realized I took for granted. But I’ve grown used to it. I’m no longer running after time, no longer chasing hours that slip through my fingers. It’s... refreshing.
So much has changed in me over the time I’ve been here.
I lost my mother. I discovered who my father is. Arnold is gone. Gregor returned. I became the leader of a prophecy and met my other half. Never in my life did I think I’d say that—I have someone I will spend the rest of my life with. It’s strange, but not in a bad way. I’d even say... it’s good. Different, but good.
Tonight is the bonding ritual, our version of a wedding. In just two weeks, I’ve experienced more than I ever thought possible. A lifetime of events condensed into weeks. And from now on, I know things will only get scarier and infinitely more serious. But in a way, I’m doing what I’ve always wanted, what I could never do before. I’m a leader. Lidéren.
My body rises and falls with Theron’s steady breaths. He looks so peaceful. A massive wolf who could tear lives apart, now resting soundly in the nest-bed. The thought tugs a smile to my lips. When did I become so unhinged that the idea of him doesn’t terrify me anymore?
Theron has changed me. More than I ever could have imagined possible.
And I’m grateful for it. I thought I was strong before I came here, but tonight, I’ll become stronger. I’ll awaken, fully bonded, and finally be able to harness the power within me.
I lift my hand, focusing on the living wooden wall to the side of the nest. A beautiful blue rose takes shape in my mind, its petals vibrant and lush, just like Mother used to love.
Within moments, the wall responds, and small blue roses bloom into existence. Seven vibrant flowers unfurl, their color deep and rich. My smile widens as I watch them, their elegance takes my breath away. I love them. They’re so beautiful to me.
Then, I close my palm into a fist, my gaze fixed on the little bush. The flowers shudder, and thick, dark thorns twist from their stems. Some curve at their edges, transforming the serenebeauty into something dangerous. A flicker of satisfaction sparks within me. Dark thoughts stir. I shake my head. No. Not that.
Soon, Theron will wake, and we’ll part ways to prepare for the ritual. For our “wedding.” But what if... A grin spreads across my face. Theron’s shaft is already pressing against my lower back. I could??—
The grin grows even wider.
Reaching for his tail, I run my fingers through the silky fur. Last time, I couldn’t help myself. It’s just so irresistibly soft. I trace my nails along the length of his tail, brushing against the skin beneath the fur. Theron’s eyes snap open. With a jerk, he sits up, and I laugh as I tumble backward from the sudden movement.
Before I can fall too far, his large arms catch me and pull me back to him. His eyes, still heavy with sleep, meet mine. “My mate,” he murmurs, his voice raspy with drowsiness.
A shiver runs through me at the sound. Goddesses, am I really this desperate? The damp heat pooling between my thighs answers for me.
“You’re wanting,” he says as he tugs me closer. His arms wrap around me, and my body clings to his, drawn to him as if it’s beyond my control.
“Why do I react like this?” I ask, placing my hands on his chest, feeling the rhythm of his heart beneath my palms.
“Why do you find your mate desirable?” he asks back, a teasing glint in his tired eyes.
Leaning in, he traces his tongue across my face. I hum, savoring the warm, wet glide against my skin. The sensation, once strange when he healed me after our first meeting, has become something I enjoy, something that leaves me “wanting.”
My gaze roams over his face. His beautiful eyes, the glistening wetness of his nose, and the gleam of his fangs.He’s so majestic.
I wanted to give him a gift, but I don’t have much here yet. A thought occurs to me. “Theron,” I whisper, leaning toward him.
