He nodded, and then he walked away, because if he stayed near her for one more second, he was going to do something disastrous in front of three hundred witnesses.
He found a wall and leaned against it. It was possible the wall was the only thing keeping him upright.
I think about you. Every minute of every day.
He'd said that. He'd actually said it. Out loud. To her face.
Sebastian pressed his fingers to his forehead and fought the urge to groan.
The supper dance was in an hour. One hour until he met her in the garden, where he would say—what? What could he possibly say that would fix any of this? What could she say?
All of the reasons this secret rendezvous was a terrible idea raced through his mind. And yet…
He couldn't quite bring himself to regret it.
She'd asked him for one true thing, and he'd given it to her. And the truth of it was still echoing through him like a gong.
Every minute. Every day.
21
Estella was quite certain she had never been this happy in her life.
I think about you. Every minute of every day.
The words played through her mind on a loop, warm and precious. She pressed her fingers to her lips as if she could feel the shape of them there. He'd said it with that rough voice of his, as though the confession had been pulled from him against his will.
Which…she supposed it had. She’d all but forced him to dance with her and then had put him on the spot. Had she been reckless and foolish? Yes. But it had paid off.
"I take it the experiment was conclusive?" Thea appeared at her elbow, one eyebrow raised.
"Quite," Estella managed. She couldn't stop smiling. It was becoming a problem because her cheeks were starting to ache.
"You're glowing," Thea observed. "It's conspicuous."
"I don't care."
"That much is evident." But Thea's expression softened into a smile of her own. "What happened?"
Estella pulled her to the edge of the room, away from the nearest cluster of guests. "He told me. Not everything, but—he said he thinks about me. And Thea, his face when he said it…" She pressed a hand to her chest, where her heart was leaping for joy. "He's going to meet me in the garden after the supper dance. We're going to talk."
"And what will you say?"
"I'm going to tell him I know. About his feelings, I mean. And I'm going to tell him that I don't care about guilt or obligation, and that I—" She stopped and drew in a breath. "I want him, Thea. I want him."
Thea studied her for a moment. "You're certain?"
She nodded. "More certain than I've ever been about anything."
"Good." Thea gave a short nod in return. "Then go tell him."
Easier said than done. She still had forty-five minutes before they were supposed to meet. How was she supposed to survive forty-five minutes?
Estella turned back to the ballroom. The music had started again, and couples were forming on the floor. She spotted Sebastian across the room, back in his usual position against the wall. Even from this distance, she could see the tension in his shoulders.
She wondered if he was regretting his words.
Probably.
