Shit.I rack my brain, trying to figure out if I told my mom anything about how I was struggling with Robyn’s schedule. She’s going to be pissed that Robyn dumped me. I swallow past the bile and the lingering vodka haze.
I decide to tone it down; I still believe I can fix this. Robyn loves me and I love her. “Well… we’re… Things have been kind of hard for a few weeks. Robyn asked for some space.”
Her gaze hardens, and the warmth in her voice cools to steel. She leans forward slightly, tapping her fingers against the countertop.
“Don’t worry, Mom. I know you love Robyn for me, and we’ll figure it out. It’s just… it’s rough having such different schedules.”
Her eyes narrow, and the shift is subtle but unmistakable. Disappointment coils into anger in her glacial eyes. “Yeah. I know firsthand how hard it is to share your life with a liar.”
Shock knocks the air from me. Before I can speak, she pulls out her phone and clicks something, and the low bass beat of a song pulses from the speakers in an uplifting rhythm. I’ve heard it before but can’t place it. She sets the phone in the center of the island between us, and my stomach drops.
On the screen is Tessa and me in the car. We’re not touching yet, but I know what happens next. My stomachlurches. I can’t believe this fucking thing keeps following me around like a scarlet letter.
“What the fuck, Mom? Why would you bring that up?”
“Becauseyoudidn’t,” she snaps, voice sharp. “And because I’m embarrassed to have raised a son who would do this to a girl he claims to love. At least your father kept things private before he left us.”
I recoil, disgust curling through me at the comparison. My father leftusbecause he hated that Mom’s job mattered more than him.I amnothinglike him.I haven’t left; I stayed.I back up a step, my hand scraping the edge of the countertop.
“I—” My voice comes out brittle. I take a step forward and stop, gripping the edge of the island with both hands. My knuckles whiten, pulse hammering. “Mom, I didn’t—This isn’t what it looks like!”
Her blue eyes don’t flinch. She leans back against the island, arms crossed, and I feel small in a way I haven’t since middle school. My stomach twists again, and I taste whatever’s left of the vodka rising up.
“You know how I’ve seen this?” she asks, her tone more clipped. More accusatory. “Margieinformedme it looked like our kids finally got together.”
I pace in a half circle, and the hardwood floor creaks under my weight. Brushing my hand against the smooth back of a chair, I take a deep breath before slamming my hand onto the countertop, rattling the glasses. The sound echoes in the kitchen, sharp and accusing.
“I’ve never been nor will I ever be with Tessa,” I spit out.
Mom tilts her head, lips pressed into a tight line, watching me like I’m a child again—caught, guilty, unworthy of trust.
“You don’t behave like you’ll never be with Tessa, Nate.” She leans forward, grasping the edge of the island, knuckles pale, fingernails pressing into the wood. Her blue eyes drill into mine, sharp and unrelenting. “Ever since that day whenshe overheard the news about her grandma passing and you took up comforting her… you’ve acted different with her, always.”
I shift under her gaze, feeling the weight of her hands on the counter across from me.
“Remember Kristy?” she asks, voice rising slightly. “That girl you dated in high school? She told you to stop canceling on her to hang out with Tessa. And what did you do? You took Tessa to the school dance instead. Kristy broke up with you—finally. And still, you wereproudof yourself that night, weren’t you?”
I grit my teeth. You’d think there was no more vodka in my stomach, but something sloshes at the memory.
Mom isn’t done. She leans closer, the faint scent of her perfume mixing with the lemon water. “And that kid you tutored? You bailed on helping him with that engineering project because Tessa needed help with math. So you left that kid twisting in the wind.”
I flinch, remembering the way Josh—my friend—stared at me, disappointed. Not unlike Robyn, except the betrayal and pain in her eyes had hit a thousand times worse.
“And you did it again,” Mom says, leaning back slightly, her hands now crossed over her chest, the tension in her shoulders obvious. “Only worse. Robyn’s supposed to matter more than anyone else. It’s not just a mistake—it’s a pattern.”
Her words land like hard knocks in my chest, her impatience and exasperation making my body shrink, but it’s not in my nature to just take it. “That’s not fair. Robyn and I have been together for years, and we’ve never had a real problem.”Aside from her schedule—and this endless waiting for her to choose me.
My mom clicks her tongue, exasperation written over her features. “I wonder what’s changed lately.”
I sink onto a stool at the island, shoulders slumping, facein my hands. What hasn’t changed is I wasn’t worth staying for,again. For a second, I’m nine again, standing in the hallway watching my father storm out of the house while mumbling that Mom can keep her career; there are plenty of women out there happy to have him.
“I-I can’t—” I choke, then shake my head, trying to force the words out. “I’m not a liar, Mom. I didn’t… I didn’t do what she thinks I did.”
Her silence is worse than words. I focus on the clattering of the ice maker, then every ache in my body: the hangover, the shame, the tightness in my chest where Robyn’s absence gnaws at me.
A knock at the door startles me, and I jump enough the stool taps against the island. The glasses on the counter wobble but don’t spill.
I head to the door and fling it open. Tessa’s voice floats through before I can even spot her. “Hey—the door downstairs was open, and I thought I’d check on you! We could order in, catch some movies, or… Oh! I’m sorry, Mrs. Leighton, I didn’t realize you were here.”
