Candace sneaked a glance in my direction and grinned before looking away. Sudden nerves buzzed beneath my skin, and a part of myself long-left ignored came roaring to life.
A normal person would notice her signals—the way she fiddled with her keys and delayed getting into her car. Any other man would see Candace nibbling on her bottom lip and think she was anticipating something.
She didn’t know I wasn’t a normal guy. That I didn’t do this sort of thing. I didn’t have drinks with women in my hometown or otherwise. I didn’t go around waiting for signs and making moves. It had been a painfully long time since I’d kissed anyone.
Candace didn’t know any of this because I hadn’t told her. As far as she knew, I was two years off a divorce and a single dad who probably had some baggage. If she knew the truth, she’d know that my baggage had baggage, and nothing about my life was as it seemed.
That selfish, spiteful part of me reared its ugly head once more. Why shouldn’t I get to act my age? I should have been able to lean in and kiss this woman. To still her nervous hands and slide my palm around her waist, tug her close, and breathe in her lavender scent. Feel the soft hairs at her temple as I pressed my lips there first.
Instead, I was thinking about how Candace didn’t know the truth about me, and how if anyone saw us together, it would reflect poorly on her.
But I deserved to be happy.
And right now, nothing would make me happier than closing the distance between us and tasting the cider on Candace Judd’s lips.
My heart pounded out a vicious beat—an internal alarm, warning me of the danger ahead. But I didn’t care. I wanted this. I wanted her.
So I shifted forward a half step and whispered, “Candace.”
She stopped messing with her keys and glanced up at me through her lashes. “Mark,” she answered shyly. Then her full lips spread in a grin as I leaned close.
Candace’s fingers gripped my nape as she rose up on tiptoes to meet me halfway. My nose brushed hers gently, and my hand did manage to find the dip in her waist as I worked to steady myself.
Then suddenly, a car door slammed somewhere nearby, followed by loud, abrasive laughter. Candace gasped in surprise, and we broke apart abruptly, like two teenagers caught in a backseat.
She met my gaze and then huffed out a little laugh.
“Sorry,” I murmured and pulled my own keys out of my pocket.
“Why are you sorry?” she asked with a sassy twinkle in her eye. “They should be the ones apologizing.”
I’d almost kissed Candace in a parking lot of a popular establishment where anyone could have seen. I knew how fast gossip traveled in this town.
What had I been thinking?
With nothing more than the promise of a kiss, I took an even bigger step back.
I could still feel her hand on my neck, her breath warm on my lips, the way she’d whispered my name—both a question and an answer.
Squeezing my fist around the key ring, I forced myself to look at her. To remember my place and what I had no business wanting. “I should get going.”
Her embarrassed amusement gave way to confusion. “But?—”
“Good night, Candace. I’ll see you in the morning.”
It took everything in me to turn and walk away. I didn’t wait for my statement to land. I could hear the finality in my tone, and I knew she heard it too.
It was instinct to want to open her door and make sure she got on her way safely. But I didn’t want to see the disappointment I’d caused. I didn’t want to hear her questions or have to spell this out for her. I was a coward.
The night ended in something crueler than disappointment. It was a painful reminder. A wake-up call. I wasn’t a normal guy, and I didn’t deserve to be happy if I stole it from someone else. I would only mess things up for Candace.
The town pariah didn’t kiss the hometown sweetheart.
And I needed to remember that.
When I got to Main Street the following morning, everything was already set up and ready to go. The volunteers must have been through at sunrise because neat rows of white tents lined either side of the street as vendors worked to unload their goods and set up their booths.
The Judd’s Orchard tent was large and positioned directly beside the one for Grandpappy’s. Will Clark was busy, unloading apples onto their tables.
